The Legend Of The Holy Grail
by Akii-1
Summary: Dean has been turned into a demon by the Mark of Cain, and has disappeared in Hell with Crowley, who's training him to become the new commander of the Knights of Hell. Sam and Cas then begin a quest to find the only person who can save him, God. But, God hasn't been seen in thousands of years... Fan Story about Season 10! Don't forget to comment! Comments are my fuel :)
1. Obsidian Eyes

**_Dear readers,_**

**_This is a fan vision of what Season 10 could be. It takes place right after season 9, and is linked to my other stories, Firestarter and How it All Started. So some characters are original._**  
**_I hope you'll enjoy reading it as much as I'll enjoy writing it! As usual I love comments, and I consider my readers inputs and point of views very interesting. So please express yourself, propose your ideas, your interpretations so this becomes your story as much as mine._**

**_Thanks in advance for your kind support :)_**

**_NB: I'm not an English native speaker, so I apologize in advance for my mistakes._**

* * *

Crowley doesn't answer. Sam has trouble remaining focused on the ritual, but he's decided that he's not going to move an inch until that son of a bitch answers him. And if he doesn't answer, Sam will chase him and stick Ruby's knife in his throat for tricking Dean into bearing the Mark.

"Crowley, I swear to God..." he says, pacing around the room.

He's restless and in the meantime extremely tired. His head hurts - too much bourbon and way not enough sleep, his eyes hurt, his whole body aches with adrenaline rushes and nothing, nothing can possibly calm him down. Nothing until he knows he has a plan to save Dean, Dean who's lying dead on his bed, Dean whose body must now be completely stiff with rigor mortis.

Why the Hell does he even think about that kind of things?

"Crowley, answer me you son of a bitch!" he yells, as if he could be heard.

His voice his coarse from too much crying, and yes, maybe he should start screaming like a maniac, maybe that would calm him down a bit. There were a few moments in his life when Sam felt close to turn completely crazy, and this is one of those. He can almost physically feel his sanity crumbling like a demolished tower. If something doesn't happen very soon, all that's going to be left of him will be a big pile of rubble. And when it's done, the only decent thing left to do will be lying next to Dean upstairs and blowing his head off.

"Crowley!"

He sits on the ground, in the middle of the devil's trap. This is it. Crowley must be laughing his ass off... Sam should have killed him when he was trapped on this chair, instead of lending him his knife like a fucking boy scout.

"Sam?"

A woman's voice, who's that? Sam grabs his gun and aims at... what's her name? Hannah?

"What the hell do you want?" he grunts and Hannah raises her hands, trying to show she's not a threat to him.

"Castiel sent me... To see if I could be of some help."

Sam lowers his gun and says

"Tell him Dean's dead." and tears begin to fill his eyes again, "why did he sent you anyway?"

"His... Grace is fading Sam. He healed Gadriel yesterday and it... Plus the shock when he heard your brother's fate... I'm sorry Sam but Castiel is dying."

Sam laughs bitterly.

"Awesome...", and adds, "so Metatron..."

Hannah completes

"Metatron is locked in Heaven's cells"

Sam yells

"Locked? Locked?!"

Hannah tries to come closer to Sam but he raises his hand to keep her away.

"He. Killed. Dean.", he angrily wipes a tear away, "He killed my brother right in front of me with one of your fucking angel blades! And you lock him? Now you respect the damn angel Geneva Convention? Who are you kidding people?"

Hannah sighs, she looks genuinely sad for Sam.

"Sam... I know it's hard for you to hear. But Metatron used to be God's scribe. We... need his knowledge."

Sam rolls his eyes at the cynicism.

"Oh yeah? And for what?"

Hannah walks a few steps closer

"You may have noticed we're less powerful than we used to be. Our power is fading Sam, it's fading by the hour. One of us was killed by Metatron's followers yesterday, by human followers. He was beaten to death."

Sam frowns

"By humans?"

"Yes, by humans. So we need to know what he's done so we can all replenish our Graces. Sam...", she takes his hand, "I'm truly, deeply sorry for your loss, but if we kill Metatron, I fear we may all die soon, and Castiel first".

Sam looks at Hannah's hand and keeps it in his before letting it go. Her contact makes him want to be comforted and he can't afford crumbling just now. Not yet.

"I'm sorry about that Hannah but hum... I'm not really..."

"I know, I know... I just came to express Castiel's and our sympathy, along with our deepest apologies for the way you two were treated a few days ago. As far as I'm concerned, Castiel is still our commander, and I trust his judgement. You are his friend, therefore, you are mine. So please tell me if there is anything, just anything I can do for you."

Sam sighs.

"Can you bring Dean back?"

Hannah lightly touches his shoulder.

"I'm afraid not... I'm afraid... No angel has enough Grace left for that Sam..."

Sam slowly shoves her hand away.

"Then I think you can leave. Tell Cas I'm sorry about his Grace. Tell him we'll see each other soon."

Hannah tries to catch his sleeve, her eyes telling she perfectly understood what Sam meant

"Sam...", she suddenly violently grabs his arm, "Sam! I feel a demonic presence!"

He grabs his gun and whispers "Where?"

Hannah replies "Upstairs".

They both silently climb the stairs, and after a few steps, Sam hears a voice, a deep voice, in Dean's room. His heart begins to race, but he can't just rush to his brother's room like a puppy, Hannah said she sensed a demon, and they have to be careful. He sees Hannah has taken an angel blade with her, and is holding it strongly in her right hand.

"Open your eyes", he hears. A Scottish accent. Fucking Crowley. He came after all.

"And let's go take a howl at that moon."

He enters the room, aiming at Crowley with his gun

"What are you doing here Crowley?" he groans, Hannah standing right behind him.

"Oh hello there Moose", he answers, smiling a wicked little smile. "Well you called me remember? And I figured quite quickly why you did. I mean, you die, Dean sells his soul. He dies you try to sell yours. Kinda seems predictable, right?"

Sam is slowly lowering his gun.

"Can you do it?", he asks, trying to control his voice, "You owe me, you owe him. So no soul trade. Just fucking do it if you can or I sware to God..."

"Sammy?"

Was it... Dean's voice? Crowley adds

" A deal won't be necessary", but Sam doesn't hear him, he's knelt close to Dean's bed and stares anxiously at his brother. His eyes are closed and he is holding the Blade. Sam takes it from him, and puts it away on the night stand. He gently takes his hand.

"Dean?", his voice begins to shake, "Dean is that really you?".

He feels Dean's hand holding his strongly, and fights hard to repress his tears, his face buried on Dean's chest where he was stabbed a few hours earlier. His heart is beating again. He feels Dean's other hand running in his hair and his throat gets tighter and tighter. If they could just all get out of the room for five fucking minutes...

Dean sits and now Sam's head rests on his lap. Sam could remain like this for hours, eyes closed, just listening to Dean's bloodstream flowing in his every vein, and feeling the warmth of his body invading his own.

"Good God..." whispers Hannah, but Sam doesn't pay attention so she raises her voice a little, "Sam, his eyes..."

Sam rises and looks at Dean. Dean's eyes are closed, and Sam brushes them with his fingers.

"Dean? Dean open you eyes buddy..."

Crowley coughs

"Maybe I should warn you..."

"Shut up a second" snaps Sam, "Dean? You with me? Open your eyes...Hannah what did you see?"

Hannah's eyes are widened with what seems to be shock and disgust.

"What have you done to him?" she murmurs, turning to Crowley. "Tell me what you've done!" she adds, with a higher voice, grabbing Crowley's sleeve.

Crowley shoves her away and protests "Nothing. I didn't do anything!"

"Out!" yells Sam "Both of you!"

Dean doesn't respond to anything and Sam's starting to be seriously worried. Hannah and Crowley stop arguing but don't get out of the room. Dean's just started to breathe really fast and Sam suddenly sees his brother hand groping the bed sheets, trying to find... to find the Blade? Sam hands it to him

"Is that...what you're looking for?"

Dean grabs it and sighs, obviously relieved.

He opens his eyes.

Sam is frozen.

Dean's eyes are black like two obsidian stones. And he's looking at him. Or is he?

Sam stutters

"De...Dean?"

His brother's hand is clenching the Blade's handle and Sam hears Hannah whispering to him from across the room "Sam... Sam get away from him"

Sam turns to Crowley and his voice sounds like a wolf's growl

"What have you done?"

Crowley raises his hands and says

"Nothing! I've already told your feathery friend!"

Sam rises from the bed, leaving an almost catatonic Dean, and draws Ruby's knife out of his jeans.

"You're gonna tell me right fucking now. What the hell happened?"

Crowley rolls his eyes and says

"What happened is your darling brother's alive Moose. Changed, but alive. You of all people should understand that."

"Don't fucking tell me what I'm supposed to understand you trash" replies Sam, putting the knife on Crowley's neck, "what happened to him?"

Sam sees Crowley's eyes turning to something behind his shoulder and he notices Dean's hand, still bloody, catching his wrist and pulling his arm back. He's not violent at all, but Sam can feel he could snap his arm with two fingers if he wanted to.

Sam turns around and mumbles "Dean...what..."

But Dean doesn't say a word.

"It's the Blade Moose, not me. The Blade saved him."

Hannah's hand is on Sam's arm, pulling him towards the door. She says "Stay back Sam, it's not your brother. He's..."

"The new commander in chief of the Knights of Hell!" claims Crowley, with a self satisfied smirk. "Responding to one man, and one man only. The King of Hell! Meaning yours truly. Right Dean-o?"

Dean remains silent.

"I guess we'll have to work on that complicity, punch line thing" says Crowley.

Sam is shivering with rage, but Hannah's grip on his arm is strong. She repeats "He's not your brother Sam...". But Sam doesn't agree

"No... He is... Dean? Dean if you hear me..."

Dean's face is still blank.

"Dean if you can hear me, I'm not giving up on you okay? You're gonna be fine, I swear. I'll find a way to save you, please... Dean?"

Sam's voice is filled with tears. Crowley looks bored.

"Well, it's not that I don't like a nice rom com moment but hum... I have a Kingdom to put back in order. Right mate?"

Dean doesn't move.

Crowley pushes him with his elbow.

"Right?"

Dean opens his mouth and says

"Right."

Sam pleads "Dean please... Come on..." tears now running on his cheeks.

Dean blinks and for a second his eyes are back to green.

He whispers sadly

"Sorry Sammy..."

And vanishes with Crowley.

Sam collapses on the ground in Hannah's arms. The angel is holding him against her and keeps on repeating "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Sam". Sam looks at her and notices the tears in her eyes. She's different from all the others angels he's ever met.

He feels sick and runs to the bathroom, throwing up bile in the sink, his insides burnt by the acid.

Hannah brings him a glass of water and a towel and Sam finally says "Thank you".

She smiles a little and replies "Not all angels are dicks with wings Sam", and Sam makes a little half smile before drinking a few sips of fresh water.

"I need to sit down" mumbles Sam, and indeed he feels like he could pass out in a minute. Hannah helps him to walk to his bed and he sits unsteadily, holding his face in his head.

"What am I gonna do?" he says and Hannah sits right beside him, putting her hand on his shoulder. But before she can say anything, the whole bunker is shaken by a tremor and they both fall on the ground.

Suddenly she hears a very high and very shrill noise. She yells "Close your eyes!" to Sam, before putting her hand on his eyes for more safety. A human can't handle what's coming and she needs to shield him from whatever it is.

She sees an intense white light through her eyelids, and a supernatural wind is filling the room. She feels her skin burn, and tries to hide Sam from the light as much as she can, turning her back to the light and hiding his face against her chest.

This can't last too long or she's going to disappear.

But it stops.

And Hannah lets Sam go before falling on her side, half burnt.

Sam kneels close to her and mutters "Oh God, oh God Hannah can you hear me?"

Hannah answers in a painful voice "I'm fine... Are you?"

"Yeah... Yeah I am... Thank you...", Hannah hisses "That's good" in pain, and Sam adds "What the Hell was that?".

Suddenly he sees a silhouette in the threshold. A shadow dressed with a trench coat.

Sam whispers

"Cas?"

And the shadow walks closer, it's Castiel, but his eyes are shining with some kind of blue light. He touches Hannah's forehead and she instantly heals.

He then turns to Sam and says

"My Grace has been replenished"

Hannah whispers

"By..."

"I think so yes" answers Castiel.

Sam gets up and asks

"Can someone just explain to me what's going on?" and Castiel walks towards him, his eyes fading back to their normal color. He puts his hands on Sam's shoulders and says "God intervened yet again in my favor Sam", and he pauses a few seconds before adding, his eyes not betraying his feelings, "Where is your brother?".

Sam just hugs him, unable to say a word, and Hannah explains to her commander what has just happened.

Castiel slowly shoves Sam away and says

"I will keep my promise Sam. I will save your brother."

Sam frowns, breathes in deeply and replies.

"OK, where do we begin?"


	2. God, a Prophet and a Witch

"I have absolutely no idea"

Well way to go Cas, thinks Sam, and the angel casually walks out of the room followed by Hannah. Sam walks with them to the library and says

"Guys? Cas?", and starts to feel angry, "Cas I swear if you go all beam me up Scotty I'm gonna..."

"I'm not... teleporting anywhere Sam. I just need books. And the books are right here."

Sam is surprised Cas recognized the Star Trek reference. Hannah obviously didn't and she's standing beside Cas, looking really confused.

"Commander?" she asks, "What do you want me to..."

Cas cuts her

"Go back to Heaven Hannah, and... rule it in my name for the time being".

Hannah says, quite shocked

"But Commander... I'm not..."

And Cas comes closer to her, looking at her with his unsettling blue eyes

"Hannah, you've been giving me the best advice anyone's ever given me in Heaven. You can do it. I need to stay here save Dean."

Hannah frowns, obviously thinking Castiel can't jeopardize Heaven's future for just one man.

"We are weak right now. All of us. I've been saved and I don't know why yet, but what I do know is I don't want us to face the new Knights of Hell with almost all of our energy gone"

She nods.

"I understand."

"For our sake, I need to stop Crowley before he re-creates this army, especially with someone like Dean Winchester commanding it. That could be the reason God healed me and brought me back here."

Hannah takes Castiel's hand

"I understand Commander. I'll do as you wish"

"Interrogate Metatron. Try to know what's happening to us and how we reverse the process", he pauses, "and Hannah? Try to know it by any means necessary", he adds, with something hard in his eyes.

"Yes Commander", replies Hannah before turning to Sam, "Good luck Sam", she says, and Sam smiles at her, thanking her again for her help and her concern.

She then disappears in thin air, and Castiel can finally drop his commander mask and heavily sits on a chair.

"Cas..." whispers Sam, sitting close to him.

"I'm okay Sam", he answers, trying to smile. "I just thought I could... I don't know, do something..."

Sam sighes. He knows how much Castiel loves Dean, and how hard it must be for him right now to see he arrived just a few minutes too late. But he has to know something,

"Did you know? About the Blade I mean?"

Castiel frowns

"No I didn't. Sam... until recently I was just a simple soldier... An orderly... There are a lot of things I don't know... That's why I thought maybe... I could find something here, something about the Blade's history among other things. But the Word of God is locked away in secret vaults. Vaults which locations are only known by Metatron..."

There are so many things Castiel doesn't know about Heaven, about his own kind. Until recently he didn't really bother him, he was after all, just a member of a garrison. He only had to know what his superiors thought necessary. But since he rebelled, since he was involved in all those power struggles, he realized his ignorance was far from being a blessing. It is on the contrary an important handicap if he can be double-crossed even by someone like Crowley. All the more since he can't really trust his own memories. They were after all altered, at least one time, by Naomi.

So right now, if he wants to be efficient, he needs solid knowledge. Word of God solid.

Sam raises an eyebrow

"The Earth's Vaults?"

"Yes. That's partly why I didn't kill Metatron. Hannah..."

"She told me. I understand Cas it's ok" says Sam, patting Cas's shoulder. Cas has a sad smile, and he adds

"For what it's worth Sam, I really, really wanted to kill him. I owe it to Hannah not to..."

Sam looks surprised

"She kinda seemed to think it was your idea"

Cas smiles

"Not really. I'm no leader Sam, I know it. Hannah's a good person."

"Not a good soldier?" asks Sam, smiling a little.

"No, a good person. That's why I need her up there. I'm done with this military nonsense. This is exactly what lead us where we are now."

Sam asks

"And what about Gadriel?"

Castiel looks down

"He sacrificed himself" and he starts to explain to Sam what happened while Dean was fighting Metatron, how Gadriel unleashed his grace to free Castiel so he could ultimately save Dean. Castiel feels really bitter about Gadriels's death, because he felt like he could have been a very interesting asset. He made terrible mistakes, but he was righteous and loyal, a lot like him before he met Dean and was taught about free will. Gadriel was still a hammer, but who knows who he could have become if he had the time to develop his own personality? He also had a lot of knowledge, useful knowledge, now gone.

Castiel doesn't mention it to Sam, but he knows Hannah won't torture Metatron or his angel followers. And even if he would really like to see them suffer, he knows it isn't a proper long term solution if he wants Heaven to be a peaceful place, to avoid further tragedies. Right now, what Heaven needs is not a Commander, it's not a general, or a providential man, it's a common and collective project. Doesn't matter if Hannah needs his image and his so called authority and legitimacy to build it. The important thing here is that knowing Heaven is in Hannah's hand eases his mind.

"Sam, I'm really sorry. I can only... imagine... what you're feeling right now and..."

Sam closes his eyes and says

"Cas... I appreciate it. Really I do.", he breathes in deeply and adds, "But right now, I need to do something you know? I can't..."

Cas nods

"I understand. I suggest you take some rest while I read those books. It can't take me more than a couple of hours."

Sam smiles.

"I searched this place a hundred times Cas, there's nothing more than what we already know about the Blade. The only person who could tell us more is... Cain himself I guess."

The angel gets up.

"Then we should go right now. If he can help us Crowley is going to send Dean to kill him, we have to go there before them. Take my hand."

Sam hesitantly takes it.

"You want to..."

"Beam you up, yes" replies Cas, and suddenly Sam feels like passing out before dizzily falling on wet grass.

"This is Cain's house", states Castiel. They're standing in front of an old wooden house and there are a dozen of beehives in the yard.

"Bees" mutters Sam, "resurrection and immortality".

"What?" says Cas, and right now he really sounds like Dean. Sam explains

"Bees are a symbol of resurrection and immortality. They're complimentary to the Snake... The Snake represents the fertile decomposition, how what's dead fathers a new life. And that new life is represented by the Bee."

He never thought taking a few art history classes back in college would prove to be any kind of useful.

"Lucifer is the Snake" whispers Castiel

"Who gave birth to the immortal Bee. And bees are also workers... and soldiers" adds Sam.

"And suppliers of life" completes a deep voice behind them, "you have ten seconds to tell me what you're doing on my yard. I guess you didn't come to discuss symbolics"

Cas and Sam turn around and notice an elderly man, dressed as a beekeeper, looking at them with wary eyes. Sam raises his hands and say

"Don't worry, we don't mean any harm."

The man doesn't move though, and looking at Castiel he claims

"If you cam to avenge your brothers angel..."

But Sam cuts him

"Listen, I'm Dean Winchester's brother. The one you transferred your Mark to. He needs your help... I need your help."

Cain looks a little less defiant and replies

"All right. Follow me. But the angel remains outside."

Castiel reluctantly agrees to let Sam enter Cain's house alone, and starts to guard it. After all, Crowley, and most of all Dean, could be there any minute.

Inside, Sam is struck by how normal Cain's house seems. The older man told him to sit on the couch, and old one, which flowery decor is worn out, barely visible. It smells like fire wood and tobacco, and looks like how he'd imagine a lumberjack's house. Cain comes back from his kitchen with two cups of coffee, and hands one to Sam, who's so surprised that he doesn't take it at first.

"You don't like coffee maybe?" says Cain, with a very serious tone. Sam snaps out of his unease and takes the cup, thanking his host and trying to look natural, even if everything is really, really confusing.

"So you said your brother had problems?"

Sam sighs and explains what happened to Dean, how he was turned into a demon and was now forced to follow Crowley's orders. Cain closes his eyes.

"Seems familiar", he says. "I warned him though, your brother. I told him the Blade came with a great burden. A burden I once carried."

Cain tells Sam about when he tried to take his own life with the Blade, and how he was born again as a demon, compelled to do every single thing Lucifer ordered him to.

"You have to understand that Lucifer had an extensive knowledge of magic. Knowledge he got from God himself."

Sam frowns

"God?"

"Yes. The Blade is not only a weapon, it's a spell. It's blood magic, the oldest form of magic."

Cain says that as if it were obvious, when Sam's eyes are wide open in awe.

"Blood magic involves blood of course, and also death. And the spell is usually completed by the death of the caster. The Mark was designed for two things, creating a powerful warrior, powerful enough to fight angels, and instantly turning a human into a demon without having to undergo the usual process."

Cain pauses and looks right into Sam's eyes.

"I don't know how many... souls... were used to even create the Mark itself."

Sam whispers

"God..."

Cain has a sour laughter, and then continues

"I don't really... know for sure how it works but I suppose the first step was my brother's murder. So first step: sibling sacrifice. Then Lucifer bound the Blade to my body and soul, and it started to slowly turn me into..."

"A demon" mumbled Sam.

Cain nods

"Yes, the more I used the Blade, the better I felt. Healthier, more confident, happier even. I didn't feel guilty about Abel anymore, or about anything for that matter. But I also needed to kill more, and when I didn't, I suffered atrociously. This was the second step: taking as much lives as possible."

Sam thinks about Dean. Did he suffer too?

"So I realized the Blade was transforming me. That I was going to become a demon, a monster. I turned it against me and when I woke up, I was a demon. Third step. By committing suicide, i actually cast a demonization spell on myself. I died, and I was reborn a Knight of Hell"

"But Dean was murdered. He didn't kill himself. Does it... matter?"

Cain frowns

"Magic is an art of precision. It must certainly matter in some ways."

Sam asks

"How... were you when you woke up?"

"I was...", Cain's gaze become vague, "I was a monster. Truly and completely obedient to Lucifer. Blood thirsty. Violent. A man I don't like to remember."

Sam gets up and starts walking around the living room.

"Dean acted like... He was forced, like he was following Crowley's orders reluctantly... He even apologized to me..."

Cain looks genuinely surprised.

"It took me centuries to acquire just a glimpse of conscience", he says, obviously troubled. "I'd say this is a sign the spell wasn't properly completed"

Sam turns to him and tries hard to hide his emotions. Maybe Dean can be saved, maybe...

"So can I save him?" he asks, and his voice is still a little unsteady.

Cain gets up and pats his shoulder.

"I don't know boy. After I killed the Knights of Hell, I tossed the Blade in the Mariana Trench, and I fled from all those who would ever want to use me. But when I did that, Lucifer was in his cage and couldn't order me directly."

Sam looks at his feet and mumbles

"So there's nothing I can do?"

Cain replies

"I didn't say that. There is not may ways to get rid of the Mark. Your brother could transfer it like I did, but..."

"Crowley will never let him..." sighs Sam

"Exactly, but there are two people I know of who could take it off his arm."

"Who?" says Sam, a little too excited.

"Lucifer, who created it, or... God." answers Cain.

Sam falls back on his chair, he can't be serious? No one has enough power to free Lucifer from his Cage, and even if someone had, if someone doesn't want Lucifer out, it's Sam. He doesn't have any kind of leverage to make him do any thing in his favor, and with Raphael and Gabriel dead, he would be the most powerful angel living.

So...

And as for God, Castiel tried to find him once, and many other angels also did. The man's gone!

Cain notices the despair in Sam's eyes and says

"I'm sorry for what happened to your brother. I gave him the Mark so he could kill the last Knight of Hell. I thought he was well aware of what he was putting himself into."

Sam looks at Cain and says

"He didn't. He was tricked... And now I need to find God!" he adds, bitterly laughing.

"For now you most certainly need a witch. If you want to deal with that kind of magic, you can't continue whatever you think you're doing without basic knowledge."

Sam fights against the mad laugh bubbling in his throat

"A witch?" he asks, trying not to sound sarcastic.

At this moment, Castiel burst into the room saying

"Sam we need to leave, Crowley's here... with Dean"

Sam looks at Cain, and begins a sentence but the old man interrupts him saying "I was waiting for him. He's here to take my life. Go now, both of you."

Cas catches Sam's arm, and before he can say anything, they're both back in the bunker's library. This time, Sam manages to remain on his feet.

"You could have let me talk to him!" says Sam, with a trembling voice. Castiel looks sad.

"Sam I... I couldn't guarantee Crowley wouldn't send him on you... or me...", and he walks closer to the younger Winchester. Sam breathes heavily

"I know... you're right...", he sits down and drinks what's left of Dean's bourbon. "By the way, you didn't use to be able to transport someone before, did you?"

Castiel sits in front of him and answers

"No. I guess that's a little improvement. So, what did Cain say?"

Sam starts to tell the Angel what the Father of Murder told him about the Mark. How they had to find a witch, and most of all God. Castiel laughs bitterly.

"Now I feel like drinking a liquor store again."

"You want some bourbon? I'd really like to get wasted right now. Screw responsibilities." adds Sam, obviously despaired.

A voice in the hallway scolds him

"I do not think this is the best thing to do"

Castiel turns around and mutters

"Ga..Gadriel?"

He is standing at the entrance of the library, and he carries a few tablets with him. He smiles

"Hello Castiel, hello Sam... Apparently God..."

Castiel gets up and walks towards him

"Intervened..."

Gadriel adds

"Yes Castiel. I came back not long ago and I brought you these."

"Is that..."

"It's part of the Word of God. Metatron once showed me one of his caches containing these. I can't read them and Metatron won't help, but if we find a prophet maybe we can learn what they're about."

Gadriel walks toward Sam and says

"I briefly went back to Heaven and learnt about your brother Sam... I'm deeply sorry."

Sam nods

"Thanks."

"I intend to stay true to my promises of help so, with your permission, and Castiel's, I would like to help you. God allowed me to come back, and I see that as a chance to redeem myself."

Sam looks at Castiel, and the angel seems to agree to the idea.

"You can stay..." he says, and he sees Gadriel politely smiling, and even...bowing?

Dear God... This is like meeting Cas again.

"But I'm still having my drink" he adds, heading to the kitchen. "You weirdos want something?", he pauses, "I guess not".

In the kitchen, Sam's first move is to reach for a bottle of Bourbon and to pour himself a drink. He sits on a chair and looks at his glass, staring at his reflection in the liquid. Maybe alcohol will just shut down the pain? He can't think straight right now, he can't... He's so tired. He knows he needs to sleep but he's afraid the only thing he will see if he closes his eyes are Dean's eyes, blank and dark as a starless night.

They were so close. So close to end this all. And everything feels so déjà vu.

Though, if he's completely honest, this time he's not alone. It's not like after Dean killed Dick Roman, when he had lost everyone he had ever cared about. He still has his home, and yes, he insists on still calling it home, and he has friends. Powerful friends, willing to help him. So maybe he's been around this block before, but not with the same company.

He looks at his glass and thinks he should try to be stronger too. He's always told Dean he should let him take some decisions, that he was able to take care of them both. Well now is the time to prove it. Not the time to get wasted and try to die the quickest possible because his brother is gone. He's not. Not completely, and even if it means tracking God down, it doesn't matter. He said it before, no one is hurting Dean again. So he's going to save his brother, and Crowley is going to pay for everything he's done.

But for that, he needs a clear mind. So he pours his bourbon down the sink and turns the boiler on.

Gadriel turns to Castiel.

"Weirdos?"

"Vernacular" explains Castiel, "it's hum...ok Gadriel. How's Heaven?"

"Fine. Hannah is doing an excellent job. She didn't let me torture Metatron though."

Castiel has a little half smile. Gadriel asks

"You're okay with that? She said it was your orders."

"I... I think old methods didn't bring us anything but conflict and suffering Gadriel. You were tortured for centuries, millennia even. What did it bring you? Nothing... Maybe Hannah's ways will change things for the best. I don't know... but I'm willing to try."

Gadriel nods.

"I understand."

Shortly after, Sam comes back from the kitchen with a smoking mug of green tea instead of a new Jack bottle. He sits at the table and notices the angels surprised stare.

"I figured getting plastered wasn't the best idea guys, that's all" he says, trying to smile. Cas and Gadriel sit close to him, and Sam sips some tea before saying

"So, we need a witch, a prophet and God. Easy-peasy right?"

"Vernacular?" asks Gadriel

Cas nods

"Vernacular."


	3. God's Tablets

Sam has spent the last hour telling Cas and Gadriel about his discussion with Cain, and the two angels seem utterly dejected. So Sam tries to lighten the mood, asking Gadriel about the tablets he brought.

" So uh Gadriel... Do you have any idea of what those tablets are about?"

Gadriel frowns, and lightly touches them. There are four tablets on the table, covered with some kind of cuneiform.

"I do not know precisely. What I do remember is that Metatron bragged about owning them he said they were", he bites his lip, trying to remember the exact words, "he said they were God's Tablets"

Castiel is shocked

"God's Tablets? Like...The Angels' Tablet?"

Gadriel nods

"Not really. Apparently these describe God's project concerning his Creation, and maybe, and that is just a mere supposition, a way to summon him, or at least to reach him. Metatron said that they were 'God's dear diary', he seemed pretty... contemptuous about them".

Sam carefully takes a tablet.

"I hear you Gad but..."

Castiel whispers to Gadriel's ear

"Nickname, it's customary" and Gadriel nods.

"Why would Metatron talk to you about those I mean...That was hum..." Sam says.

"Strategically stupid" completes Gadriel, "but if Metatron has one flaw, it is his ego. He was indeed God's scribe, but he was just a simple angel. Not even a seraph, contrary to me. I suppose it was a way to prove his legitimacy, to prove he knew... everything."

Castiel gets up and begins to walk around the room.

"Why didn't he destroyed them if they were designed to summon God? He had absolutely no interest in his return..."

"Indeed", replies Gadriel, "But maybe the tablets explain other things like... our origins. How angels were created."

Sam interrupts him

"What?"

"Think about it" says Gadriel, "A lot of angels have died since God left Heaven from what I gathered".

Castiel nods, he looks dark.

"But have you ever seen any newborn angel Castiel?"

Castiel's eyes are widened with surprise, he's actually never thought about this.

"No. No I don't think I did."

"Me neither. I don't even... remember being born. I don't think any angel does." Gadriel hesitates, visibly troubled by his own ideas. "Maybe those tablets could give us the explanations we need."

Castiel sits down, shocked, and Sam drinks some tea, suddenly regretting his healthy decision. Castiel tries to go back into his own memories, what is his first memory? His very first one? He's not quite sure. He remembers standing on a shore, looking at some fishes, fishes that could get out of the water for a couple of minutes. And one of his brother said "these are important fishes Castiel, don't step on it". But since he's met Dean, he's been thinking those memories sound completely fake, though he never dared talking about it, or even thinking about it for too long.

How could he have stepped on a fish without a vessel, since human didn't exist then? Who named him? Who was the "brother" talking to him?

Another old memory is seeing the Tower of Babel, the Tower God was supposed to have destroyed because men, after the Flood, had built it to reach Heaven. Babel, coming from Bab, the door, and El, God. The door to God. If it ever existed, if God came as far as destroying it, it had to be something very powerful yet he remembers it as a 37 feet high, mud-brick tower. Insignificant. Built by apes. It seems totally inconsistent and he has a thousand memories like this. Like postcards or... like... Total Recall?

"I don't remember being born either" whispers Castiel

Gadriel shrugs his shoulders, sympathizing

"I had a lot of time to think about it when I was imprisoned. I thought about what I knew about myself, the world and even... what had happened to me. I clearly remembered having been sent to Heaven's Cells for letting Lucifer enter the Garden of Eden. But..."

He looks puzzled

"I couldn't remember why I did it, or what Lucifer did, or why he was even there. And I didn't understand why it deserved such a harsh punishment."

Castiel frowns

"We've never been raised at wondering why we were punished..."

"Exactly", completes Gadriel, "And my cellmate, Abner... I never knew why he was there, neither did he. Not because his imprisonment was arbitrary but because he simply didn't remember why he was there"

Sam interrupts the angels

"You're telling me you have no idea of... who you really are?"

Gadriel sighs

"I'm afraid so Sam. My... questions... were so provocative that I spent... millennia... being tortured by another angel, named Thaddeus. Every time I asked for an explanation he tortured me."

Gadriel doesn't like to think about his time in Heaven's Cells, about Thaddeus, and mostly about Abner, whom he killed, ordered by Metatron. He wanted so bad to be forgiven then, to be restored in his right place in Heaven that he did what every angel was raised to do, he obeyed. He obeyed and he forgot about his doubts, leading him to trust someone clearly deranged and to kill the only friend he'd ever had. But when he stabbed himself, unleashing his Grace to save Castiel, he did his first autonomous action. He discovered what free will was, and all his doubts and questions came right back to his mind. That conviction he used to know something important. Something so important it lead to him being locked away for eternity, even if he couldn't remember what that thing was.

When Metatron showed him the Tablets, Gadriel briefly thought these could be the explanation he had been waiting for. But he didn't dare to think about it, or to ask about their content. Metatron seemed to think this would prove God to be...what did he say? "Nothing more than a Trickster". So when Gadriel woke up in the middle of a field, in his healed vessel, and his with his Grace restored, he immediately thought about finding these Tablets, and about bringing them to the only angel he trusted, Castiel.

Sam is biting his nails, thinking. Something's not right. He asks

"Wait, wait, wait. If Metatron had these tablets in his possession, why didn't he use them? Or at least hid them better?"

Castiel mumbles

"We're talking about a man who hid the Angel Tablet inside his typewriter."

Sam rolls his eyes

"Indeed..." he says, "But guys... How does it... help us saving Dean?"

He feels like a whiny child saying this, but truthfully, he couldn't care less about Heaven's future, the declining Graces and basically everything related to the Angels. Plus he's tired, and it doesn't help him to follow that kind of conversation. If the Angels don't know who they really are, and what's their actual purpose, there's no surprise the majority of them are just hammers, waiting to be ordered around. He may be a flawed, mortal, and let's be honest, pretty fucked up human, but at least he knows who he is and where is going, when Cas and Gadriel just look completely clueless about... everything. And that's not reassuring at all.

"Cain said we needed to find God, Sam.", answers Castiel. "I've never seen him in person, I've never...succeeded in contacting him. You remember?"

Sam mutters

"Yeah."

"So if those tablets can tell us how to find him, then we'll be able to ask him to save Dean and also to... save us all. It's uh... what's the expression? Shooting two birds with one stone."

"I see" replies Sam, but inside he feels like one of the birds is soon going to be much more strategic than the other.

"Absolutely" adds Gadriel "We were all injured in the Fall, but our global power is declining, and fast. So anything possibly able to restore our former glory is of highly strategic importance. I didn't mention those Tablets to anyone else. Maybe we can keep them here?"

"In that case", replies Castiel, "We need to ward the place against other angels, if you agree Sam."

Sam nods

"All right. Every angel out except Cas and Hannah", he hesitates, "and Gadriel I guess".

Gadriel sighs

"Thank you for your trust Sam."

"Don't make me regret it" answers the hunter, who's just got up to stretch his legs.

Sam's kind of gloomy. His encounter with Cain didn't give him much hope. Indeed, Dean isn't an ordinary demon now, even if it's painful to even think Dean and demon in the same sentence. As long as he has the Mark, there is clearly nothing that can be done. If the Blade didn't kill him, then Ruby's knife won't either. And if injecting a demon with human blood may cure him, on the other hand, it won't take the Mark off. Cain has been, or more accurately now, was on Earth for quite a long time, and if there had been a simple way to get rid of that Mark, then he would have done it.

So yeah. Plus, watching Gadriel and Cas talk about Heaven makes him feel like soon enough they're going to think Heaven's future is way more important than Dean's. Well, if he's being just plain logical, it does make sense. They could take those tablets with them and try to restore Heaven the way it was. Wipe out Hell. Wipe out Dean...

To that kind of beings, Dean and him are expendables, variables.

It makes him think about John, and God, he doesn't need that right now. Though he appreciates the irony. John had always considered he would be the one to turn to evil and then, well look at that, Daddy dearest, it's your favorite student who became a demon. What does it say about your glorious education, I wonder? But it's unfair. Unfair to Dean, and it's clearly not the moment to dwell on the past.

He feels a hand on his shoulder. Cas.

"What?" he mumbles.

"Come with me" says Castiel, walking to Sam's room. Sam follows, intrigued.

Once they arrive, Cas points at his bed and Sam sits on it, wondering what the angel wants. Actually Castiel would like to have a talk with Sam, pretty much the way he figured Dean would if his brother was out of sort. But he really doesn't know how to do this. Comforting people is not really his area, but he always tries his best even if it often results in him being really awkward.

"I uh... I won't leave you Sam" he says, hesitantly.

Sam looks confused, and maybe a little amused

"Cas? What do you..."

Castiel sighes

"I told you I'd help you, I told you I'd help Dean and I want you to trust me Sam."

Sam's going to protest but Cas cuts him and says

"Don't tell me you do because I can see you... don't. At least not fully. So listen... Why don't you take some rest while Gadriel and I try to figure something out about these God Tablets?"

Sam wants to say he's fine but actually he's exhausted. He just really, really doesn't want to sleep if it means he's going to dream. He's torn between going to Dean's room and crying his eyes out and staying awake and active so he doesn't crumble. Thinking about Dean makes him want to scream.

"I can make you sleep if you want", whispers Cas, sitting on a chair close to Sam's bed.

Sam's hands are clenching his bed sheets, and Castiel wonders what he can do to ease his pain. Him too is devastated by Dean's fate, but he's way stronger, even more since his Grace was restored. Sam on the other hand is visibly tired and desperate, and Castiel feels stupid to have had that long conversation with Gadriel about the God Tablets. Sam must have thought he was more interested in Heaven than in Dean, and he can't really blame him. When Sam jumped in the Pit, Castiel had no better idea than to start a war with Raphael instead of helping.

"Saving Dean remains my personal priority" he says, bending over to Sam.

He sees Sam nodding.

"Thanks" he mumbles. "Thanks Cas I... I'm sorry."

"About what?" asks the angel.

"I'm not very useful without Dean"

Castiel smiles

"Dean used to say the same thing about himself."

Sam represses a sob and says

"I think I really need to sleep, can you make me...", he hesitates a little, "not dream?"

"Of course", says Castiel and as he touches Sam's forehead, the hunters falls in a deep sleep.

Castiel looks at the asleep Sam and allows himself to look as worried as he is. This is going to be much more complicated than he ever thought it would be.

"How is he?" asks Gadriel, who remained in the library.

"Not that good" answers Castiel, sitting in front of him. "So how do we decipher those tablets? If Metatron won't read them, who can?"

"Truthfully, I do not know. As I said, I interrogated Metatron but he wouldn't say anything. But how do we find a Prophet if we have no God?"

"And how do we find God if we don't have a Prophet..." says Castiel. Suddenly his expression changes and he claims "We need Kevin Tran."

"Kevin Tran?" asks Gadriel, "He is... dead... I..."

Gadriel remembers very vividly killing the young Prophet and it makes him terribly guilty to even pronounce his name.

"He is indeed" answers Castiel, "But with the Gates of Heaven barely opened I don't think the Reapers have had the time to lead all the souls trapped in the Veil to Heaven. Which means he's certainly still here."

Gadriel opens his eyes wide

"You want to resuscitate him?"

Castiel nods and adds"It wouldn't be the first time an angel saves a prophet. And he is our best shot"

But the other angel doesn't seem convinced.

"I doubt he will accept to help us if he sees I'm working with you..."

Castiel takes a few minutes to think. Then he explains to Gadriel that he could go upstairs and ask Metatron to translate the tablets, but it would disclose their existence to the other angels. And clearly, with Heaven being barely working, it's something he really would like to avoid. Plus, if he did that, and Metatron refused to cooperate, it would raise all kinds of question about how he would be supposed to react, and his reaction would bring even more questions about his legitimacy as Heaven's current ruler.

"Kevin Tran is our best shot" Castiel says

"All right" replies Gadriel, "after all he is a Prophet of the Lord and you represent Heaven."

Castiel looks at Gadriel with a slightly disappointed gaze

"Gadriel... no. I won't force him. Kevin Tran's always been an intelligent boy. I'll just explain to him what's happened and we'll see what he decides to do."

**"NO."** answers Linda Tran. "Let's be clear. If you resuscitate my son I'll be eternally grateful to you, but if it's to send him back to risking his life, then it's no. I forbid it."

Castiel has just arrived at Mrs Tran's house. He drove there, for more discretion, and he came alone. Gadriel is at the bunker watching over Sam, and bringing him wouldn't have been very productive, if not completely distatesful. But maybe he shouldn't have begun his speech by "Your son is needed by the Lord". That's in that kind of moments he realizes that before, Dean was the one to do the talking.

He was so glad Kevin hadn't been caught yet by a Reaper that he didn't think about what he was saying, and now Linda Tran is standing right in front of him, arms crossed and with her eyes saying if you want to do anything to my son you're gonna have to go through me. When he was still a "good soldier", he would have had no problem with smiting Mrs Tran if it meant respecting his orders or doing what's right for Heaven. But he's been since trying to be a better person and apparently, respecting people's consent can be a real pain in the... As Dean would say.

"Mom..."

Kevin Tran has just appeared behind his mother

"Mom can you at least let him explain himself?"

Linda has tears in her eyes and she doesn't look like she's backing down anytime soon.

"Kevin, if he can revive you then he has to do it without condition. He owes you, they all owe you. "

"I'm well aware Mrs Tran" says Castiel, and he touches Kevin's forehead. The young man's eyes become white and a bright light suddenly emanates from his body, so bright that his mother has to hide her eyes not to be blinded. When she opens them, she sees Kevin, in tears, stuttering

"I... I'm back..." and then saying, almost ecstatic, "Mom! I'm alive!".

Linda burst into tears and hugs her son, touching his face, his hair and holding him so strongly Kevin has to push her away, laughing.

"You're smothering me Mom!"

Linda smiles through the tears and says

"You missed it i'm sure!"

And they both laugh while Castiel is nostalgically looking at them. It might seem silly but this is something he really misses. A family. Not in its angelic meaning, closer to a garrison, but a real family. That's why he's always been close to the Winchesters. Before he met them, he had hundreds of people he called "brother" or "sister" but no one who would do for him just 1% of what Sam and Dean would do for one another. Being part of their family is maybe the most important thing that has ever happened to him. Not only because it's a family he chosen but also because everything he's lived with Dean is unaltered in his mind. Those are his most precious memories and when he doubts about who he is, he always has the last five years to help himself figure it out.

So today, he's going to do what Sam and Dean's friend would do. He's going to reunite the kid with his mother and ask for nothing in return. Do what Dean would do: screw the natural order and give Kevin his life back.

"Goodbye Mrs Tran, goodbye Kevin" he says, walking away. But he feels a hand grabbing his coat and he turns around. It's Kevin, with a little worried look.

"Tell me what's going on" he asks, and Castiel smiles at him shyly before turning to Mrs Tran who is ruffling Kevin's hair.

"Why did I raise you to be responsible, I wonder..." she says, her eyes shining with pride. "Please come in", she tells Castiel. On their way to the living room she adds "Thank you, from the bottom of my heart" and it makes Castiel feel somehow better.

Once they're all sit down, Castiel explains to Kevin what happened to Dean, and unsurprisingly, Kevin looks quite sad when he hears it.

"How's Sam?" he asks, obviously worried.

"He's... devastated" says Castiel, "they had huh... managed to sort their differences out and... Dean died in his arms"

Kevin sighs

"Poor Sam... I can't possibly imagine what it's like for him to go through all that all over again" he says, looking at Cas, trying to convey... what? He continues

"I remember when I lost Channing he told me... it gets better. I hope it does for him... for them..."

Kevin is doing something with his eyes, opening them a little too wide. What does he... Oh! Of course. Castiel replies

"Yes... Yes you can imagine how he feels" while trying to do the same thing with his eyes, only resulting in Mrs Tran saying

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

"No Mom, nothing at all" answers Kevin, discretely winking at Cas. Castiel thinks he really has to work on that non verbal communication thing.

"So... To save Dean you need to find God, no less." adds Kevin.

"Yes" says Castiel, "and for that we need your help Kevin. I won't... force you. But hum... Dean and Heaven's future might be in you hands"

Kevin laughs and says

"No pressure!" , with a big smile. He pauses and holds his mother's hand before saying "I'll help you." and Castiel sees Linda Tran's hand clenching her son's. She asks

"Can you guarantee his safety?"

Castiel hesitates a little. Guarantee is a strong word, and Kevin has been hurt before.

"Guarantee I cannot tell but I will do my best to keep him safe."

Linda closes her eyes and after a few seconds she says

"Not enough. I'm coming."

Kevin laughs, protesting

"Mom!"

And Linda Tran adds

"What are you going to eat? To wear? Where are you going to sleep? That's the kind of things I also care about!"

Kevin rolls his eyes and smiles to his mother

"I'll be fine Mom..."

But Linda doesn't agree

"Kevin dear, you might be a Prophet of the Lord but as far as I'm concerned, I'm still your mother and I'm not letting you sleeping two hours a night and feeding yourself with nothing but Doritos."

Her son sighs and tells Castiel "You heard the boss?".

Castiel nods, thinking Heaven would definitely need a Linda Tran.


	4. Help

"How long have I slept?" Sam asks Gadriel.

The angel is surrounded by books and he seems completely amazed by what he's reading.

"Gad? You're with me?"

Gadriel blinks and say

"Oh uh... yes", he looks around, "apparently we're in the same room"

Sam chuckles and asks again how long he was asleep and where is Castiel. Gadriel answers he slept for almost twenty four hours, and that Castiel went to look for Kevin. Sam's eyes are widened in surprise,

"Castiel wants to bring Kevin back?" he asks

"Indeed. We agreed on keeping the tablets a secrets for the time being, and Kevin being the last remaining Prophet..."

Sam sits and admits it does make sense though he's not sure Kevin will help them after everything that's happened.

"That's what Castiel said" replies Gadriel, "But he also mentionned him being honorable".

"He is", confirms Sam, "I'd really... like to see him again... alive I mean."

Gadriel frowns and apologizes again. He explains Sam he has a lot of regrets about having used his body in such a terrible way.

"I am only starting to realize how... hard it must have been for you.", he pauses, "I cannot ask your for your forgiveness, because I know it is way too early. But I would like you to know that when I accepted to heal you, I wanted to do right by you I wanted..."

His gaze become vague.

"I wanted to be a good... person. And being in your mind showed me... what it meant." he says, now staring at Sam, who feels a little uneasy. Gadriel looks very sincere though. He really reminds him of Castiel in the beginning. And that's kind of a problem. Because Castiel used to be full of good intentions, but last time he checked, it wasn't the road to Heaven which was paved with these. So Sam wants to yell at him that he doesn't care about his regrets, that they're all the same. People, angels, demons, acting first and thinking later, and then whining about the consequences of their actions, saying they will do better nex time. As if it could possibly make up for everything they destroyed. As if...

"Sam?"

Sam realized tears are falling from his eyes and he incredulously wipes them with the back of his hand. Dean died two days ago. Only two days ago. And everyone is in battle mode except him. It makes him feel guilty but also angry at the same time, angry at the world and at everyone around for being able to function when Dean is suffering somewhere, living his worst nightmare.

There's an hysterical laugh building itself in his throat. He died again. Here we are again. Well, I shouldn't be so sad because... by now I should be used to this right? Used to loosing, used to be... Useless! We could even make fun of it right? Oh my God! You killed Dean! You bastard! Just like in South Park. Or it could be a terrible scene in a terrible soap opera where people die, and come back without explanation. Maybe some nip tucked old actress is going to appear soon and say it was all a dream, or that it wasn't really Dean who died, but his long lost twin who had been kidnapped at birth and raised by buddhist monks to be the next Dalaï Lama.

He misses Dean so terribly it's physically painful, and not knowing where he is, how he is and what he's doing only makes it worse.

He slept without dreaming and it felt really nice, this sweet, and deep oblivion, but the moment he was awake he started to be harassed by visions of Dean being tortured, Dean being forced to kill people, Dean loosing his soul, being lost forever. Everytime Dean's hurt, Sam feels it as if he was the one to be hit. It was already like this when they were kids. Sam used to pinch himself when John hit Dean, to sympathize, to show him he wasn't alone. And Dean always told him he didn't have to do that, that he didn't want him to be hurt. So Sam stopped, but he kept on feeling Dean's every injury as if they were his own.

So if he suffers like this right now, how's Dean?

He can't think straight, he can't have a minute of peace and yeah, you know what could be useful Gadriel? Burning my brain and my eyes with you magic fingers so I don't get completely nuts. Who is he kidding anyway? He's never been able to take care of himself alone. Running away, that, he can. Trying to forget everything in a girl, any girl's arms, pretending he's someone he's not so he doesn't drown in sadness, he's done before. But facing reality, doing something, fighting for a cause and not for dying in battle, he just can't...

"Sam... tell me what I can do..."

Gadriel is really worried, because it's been several minutes now that Sam is crying in silence with his eyes wide open. His fists are clenched, his whole body is tense, and the angel doesn't know what that means. He looks like someone who could be ready to attack, or ready to bash his head on the table. Gadriel has suffered before, he has been sad, he has felt betrayed, but he has never felt what Sam is experiencing. That being said he's been in his head long enough to know how much Sam loves his brother, how deep their bond is, deep enough to kill both of them if it's cut. And right now, Gadriel doesn't know what to do to ease Sam's pain. He could force him to sleep, but Castiel said it wasn't a good idea to force people to do things. Humans are complicated. Too complicated.

Fortunately, that's the moment when Castiel choses to come back to the bunker, alone. And before Gadriel can say anything, Castiel is crouched beside Sam and he asks him if he wants to sleep again. Sam nods and Castiel puts him to sleep, before asking Gadriel to carry him to his room. When he comes back, he finds Castiel looking visibly puzzled.

"I can't keep doing that to him" he says, visibly concerned. "I know he's grieving, I know he's worried, but I have no idea what I'm supposed to do or say."

Gadriel nods.

"I think you did what was best Castiel, he's a human, he needs to rest."

Castiel has a sad half smile.

"He's not physically tired Gadriel..."

But the other angel doesn't seem to understand, and to end the awkwardness he asks Castiel about Kevin's answer, and Cas tells him he's coming in a couple of days, just the time for him and his mother to arrange a few things. Castiel also tells him he didn't inform Kevin about Gadriel's presence and that it would be good if in the beginning, Gadriel came back to Heaven.

"I had a lot of difficulty to make him accept to help us, and I'm afraid that if he sees you he will refuse to help."

Gadriel looks a little disappointed but understands Castiel's point.

"Plus I think Hannah is going to need some help up there, and I could use some extra ears. Especially about what's going on in Hell at the moment, if you could take care of this."

Gadriel replies

"I'll be honored to help."

Castiel smiles and tells Gadriel he would like to have regular reports on Heaven's situation, and that he'll come soon to see it for himself. But for now, he can't just leave Sam alone, or Kevin.

"When everything is settled you can come back." he says, and Gadriel leaves, after thanking him again for his trust.

Once he's alone, Cas sits on a couch and almost regrets his time as a human, when he coud get wasted. How is he supposed to heal Heaven and make it work again if he can't even heal one human? That requires a knowledge he doesn't have, and to pass the time, he decides to read the entire Men of Letters Library. He doesn't find anything about human psychology, but he does read a great deal of books about various subjects, including angels. One book taught him an interesting thing about Metatron, something he should tell Gadriel to check soon. In an old hebrew book called Sepher Hekhalot, he reads the transcript of the meeting between a jewish wise man, Rabbi Ishmael, and the "archangel Metatron", who tells him he actually is the Patriarch Enoch, son of Jared, raised in Heaven by God himself to be his scribe. If this story is true - apart from the archangel part, but now everybody knows Metatron is a show-off - it would not only prove that Metatron is far younger than what he pretends, but also that angels can be created using human souls. And that, that is something interesting.

The next morning, Sam wakes up, looking a little better, and he thanks Castiel for making him sleep again. He promises he will try to get better soon, but still anxiously asks if Cas has heard anything about Dean, or Crowley, or anything. The angel can't miss the sadness in his eyes when he tells him that he doesn't know anything yet, but he tries to reassure him by telling him he sent Gadriel to investigate.

"Sam, I know it must be terribly painful for you to be ignorant of your brother's whereabouts... But I'm doing everything I can, all right?"

Sam nods and tries to smile. He still feels terrible, but a little less, and he really has to push himself to do something. He lighten up a little when he hears Kevin is alive and has accepted to help. He has always liked him, and admired his mother for being so protective and supportive of him. Linda Tran is a real tiger, but also a very loving mother. The kind he would have liked to have. If Kevin comes, he will have the opportunity to make it up to him, and maybe he'll find some answers in those God's Tablets that could help to save Dean. So if they don't have God yet, they have the Prophet.

Now they need a witch. Problem, all the witches he's ever met were vicious or crazy or both. Wait. Not all. There was this one... during the Trials... What was her name?

"Who's Saskia Jager?" asks Castiel

Sam doesn't really remember her features precisely, but what he does remember is the tattoo which covered her whole back, a cherry tree branch, made of dozens of different spells. He had never seen this before and would have loved to study it. Saskia had said she came from a witch family, and that she used to be a hunter. Sam remembers her powers to be really impressive as she was able to kill a ghost with her mind. But it also made her extremely sick.

But he was sick as well then, he was doing the trials, and was terribly weakened by them, feverish, constantly exhausted and unable to sleep. Saskia had proposed Dean to take them to her home so she could try to heal Sam.

Sam recalls she was living in a tiny but really pretty white wooden house, and that she made him a tea that knocked him out in maybe ten seconds.

In the morning they had left with Dean, and Saskia had barely said goodbye. At that time Sam had wondered if Dean hadn't try to hit on her while he was asleep, and God knows he can lack subtlety. All the more since the girl was supposed to get married soon.

But she's the only witch he's ever met who wasn't the proverbial witch. Well, she did took advantage of her knowledge and power to make a little extra money, but that was pretty much it.

So when he found her name and number written in Dean's hunting journal, he decided to call her. Maybe she knows things about magic, and precisely blood magic, maybe she could teach him. Sam feels a little guilty about barging in her life like this. After all it's been almost two years, she's certainly married, maybe with a kid, and she must want to leave in peace. But he needs to give it a try, he needs to do something for the team, so he dials her number, and puts his phone on speakers, so Cas can hear the conversation.

"Nan's Treasures, this is Nicole speaking!" says an elderly female voice.

"Good morning Madam, could I speak to Saskia Jager please?"

"Saskia? Saskia doesn't run the shop anymore mister...?"

"Uh... Knopfler" says Sam, and Castiel whispers "Dire Straits?", and Sam nods, smiling.

"She still owns it though Mr Knopfler but maybe I can help you?"

"Uh...yes. Saskia and I met on a fair a couple of years ago, and I'm a antique dealer myself. I would really like to have her input on an ancient chinese wardrobe I recently bought, so I wonder... Maybe you have her cellphone number?"

Sam hears the woman sigh and he sees Castiel marvelling at his ability to tell lies with such a straight voice.

"Well. I do have it, but I must warn you Saskia might not want to help you. She took a sabbatical leave."

"Oh I suppose she did that after her wedding?" he says, to prove he did meet her. He hears a big sigh on the phone.

"Dear Lord", she says,"I might as well tell you, I'm Nicole Devereaux, I was supposed to be her mother in law."

"Su...supposed?"

The woman begin to speak very fast, and let's be honest, with a very annoying voice.

"Yes! That poor Saskia was engaged to my son Michael and I loved her! I loved her, that sweet girl you know! And I still do! She's so clever and deserving but my son... Oh God, men are so... Well don't take it personally but he... He left her! Three months before the wedding. And for who? For WHO?"

Sam wonders when this is going to stop and Castiel looks very confused.

"Uh..."

"Jessica Marilyn Carpenter, the girl he dated in highschool and that I already hated then. I told him. I told him "Mikey you're stabbing your own mother in the back", but would he listen? Of course not! So he got engaged with Jessie and guess what? She's pregnant now. I should be happy to be a grandmother right?"

Listening to Nicole Devereaux, Sam thinks Saskia is actually quite lucky to have been dumped.

"I guess so..."

"I'm not! She's going to be a terrible mother! She has the intelligence of a mussel. When that darling Saskia gave me a job! Can you imagine? Running her shop while she's away. She decided to go to college. Oh dear... Anyway that's why she took a leave, because my son is an idiot. You have a paper?"

As he had stopped listening for a moment Sam jumps at her question

"I'm sorry what?"

"A paper, for the number!"

When he's dialing Saskia's number he feels a little anxious at the witch's reaction. She took a sabbatical leave, she's certainly in college now, studying for her finals. It reminds him of his college days and how the supernatural collided with them in the worst possible way.

After a very long wait, he finally hears a young female voice saying simply

"Hello?" with a very friendly tone. Sam breathes in

"Saskia Jager?"

"Speaking", answers the voice, now a little wary

"It's uh... Sam Winchester, maybe you don't remember me but..."

"On the contrary I do, I do really well. How are you Sam? Last time I saw you you could barely stand on your own."

Sam is amazed she remembers his name.

"I'm fine thank you hum... This is a little awkward..."

"Do you boys need anything? "

Now this is getting weird.

"I can come right now if you want, just send me your location and I'll be right with you"

"Uh... All right..."

Sam types the bunker's coordinates and sends them to Saskia.

"Got it" she says, after a second. And she hangs up, not leaving Sam enough time to say anything more.

Sam is really confused. He didn't say anything about the reason of his call and now she's coming? Cas looks at him with the same expression. They don't have much time to think about what's just happened because someone is banging at the door.

Sam climbs the stairs with his gun in hand, and he opens the door, aiming at a young blond woman.

She turns to him with a smile and says "I told you I'll be right with you" and she enters the bunker, as if it were her home. Now he's seen her face he remembers her much clearier than before. She's the same, but in the meantime she's... different, she doesn't look afraid or wary like when they met her.

Downstairs Castiel is waiting for them and Saskia looks at him her eyes opened in shock and adoration.

"An angel" she whispers, slowly walking to Castiel, "You shine so bright I can barely look at you" she says, softly touching Cas's trench coat.

"He shines?" says Sam incredulously, tucking his gun at the back of his jeans.

"Yes he does..." she replies, still staring a Cas.

"I'm Castiel", says the angel, a little uncomfortable.

"And I'm Saskia" she completes, shaking his hand, "It's a real honor to meet you Castiel".

She then turns to Sam and asks "Where is your brother?"

Sam sighs and say

"Well that's kinda why I called you."


	5. Wizards

"So that's the whole story", says Sam, after spending the last half hour explaining to Saskia what happened to Dean.

The young witch sits down and begins to twirl a strand of hair in her fingers, biting her lip. That's something she does every time she thinks and this, this requires a lot of thinking. First thing first, she needs Rudi's help. This is quite complicated for her though completely awesome in a way. She's never had the occasion to study such an ancient and complicated spell. The Mark of Cain! The First Blade! She could get completely hysterical over it if it wasn't such a tragedy for the brothers. Sam looks terrible, pale and tired... She remembers the first time she saw him when he was so sick because of that power he was carrying... Which makes her think about Rudi's reaction when he's going to learn the Winchester and their friend Castiel were responsible for the angels' fall. Her adoptive father is a nice man, and the best warlock on Earth, but he's completely anti social and he resents the people who use magic without the proper training or knowledge.

"Saskia? So... what do you think?"

Saskia blinks.

"I think I need my stuff", she answers, smiling, "I think I need my books, my crystals and a place to stay because that's going to require a lot of studying Sam"

Sam sighs, obviously relieved.

"Do you think you can help us?"

Saskia gets up and come closer to him, gently stroking his arm.

"I'll do my best to help you two, I owe you so much."

Sam seems surprised

"You owe us? I uh... thought it was rather the contrary..."

He notices the confusion in Saskia's eyes. She explains to him how Dean gave her Garth's phone number, and how it helped her to meet an old acquaintance who led her to find her adoptive father, Rudi Heartfield, who's been training her for the last two years.

"Rudi is the only family I have left and if I was able to see him again, it was thanks to your brother. Rudi taught me how to control my abilities and everything he knows about magic. So yeah, I definitely owe Dean."

She smiles.

"I tried to call him a couple of times, to thank him... but he never picked up. So when you called I saw that as an opportunity to thank you two."

Sam asks

"So you're... in control? Of your power I mean... I don't want you to hurt yourself or anything."

She smiles

"It doesn't make me sick anymore, I'm strong enough and I'm not the nuclear bomb I used to be"

Sam doesn't understand precisely what she means by this, but he doesn't give it too much thinking. She accepted to help him and that's a real relief. Soon he's going to know what the Mark of Cain is really about, and maybe manage to help Dean. Kevin is also coming soon, and it feels nice, reassuring not to be alone again. During the first few hours after Dean's departure, he really had to fight hard against his instincts, he wanted so bad to flee, or to die, that he was unable to think. Now he feels a little better, a little more confident. People are not leaving him alone, leaving them alone. And he doesn't know why, but there is something really familiar about Saskia, though he can't quite grasp what. It just feels like they're... alike, in some ways.

He shows her an unoccupied room, and tells her she can use it when she comes back with her stuff. Saskia smiles and take a piece of white chalk out of her jean's pocket. She begins to draw symbols on the floor: a big six pointed star, "an hexagram" says Saskia, "powerful thing, that". Then she draw three spirals inside the star, "a triskelion", and a circle around the star, "the ouroboros". She looks at Sam and adds, "this is your first lesson, look. The hexagram is a star, but it's also two triangles together, you see?".

Sam nods, that's the star of David, a symbol he saw many times.

"Well the triangle is a symbol of unity, so when two are combined, one male and one female, or one yin and one yang if you prefer, it represents the world. Then, you can see they also form a rhombus, right? The rhombus is the symbol of passage and exchange."

Saskia continues her explanation. The triskelion represents many things depending on the context of its use. Here, it symbolizes the time, past present and future. And finally, the Ouroboros, the snake biting his tail, is the symbol of the infinite, the perfection of the divine.

"Now, what do you think this whole thing's for?" asks Saskia, with a smile.

Sam looks at the symbols and thinks. A passage... inside the world... encircled by the divine...

"It's to travel... That's what you used to come here. It protects you so you don't get... lost... in time, space and worlds?"

Saskia gets up and grins

"Congratulations Sam! That's exactly that. The spell I use to come here can work on its own, but it's better to use that kind of portal. I'm going to gather the things I need, and see if my father can help us. You'll be ok?"

Sam has a tired half smile

"Yeah I'll be fine".

Saskia shows him a stone she kept in her pocket

"A quartz crystal, it works as a catalyst, look, I'm putting it in the middle of the triskelion"

Sam sees the crystal beginning to glow, and the chalk on the ground become bright white.

"And now I'm gone! See you soon"

A flash of light fills the room and when Sam opens his eyes again, Saskia's gone. Maybe with her help he's going to figure out a way to save Dean, a more realistic one than finding God, wherever he is.

When he comes back to the library, Castiel is reading an old book and looks really puzzled. Sam asks him what he's reading, and Castiel tells him about what he learnt last night, Metatron being the patriarch Enoch.

"This is... really strange", says Castiel, "I've never heard of this of... humans... being turned into angels..."

Castiel closes the book

"We really need to know what he knows if we want to find God."

Sam frowns and says

"Yeah about that..."

But he doesn't have the time to finish his sentence because Hannah has just appeared behind Cas and is saying

"Commander, we have a problem".

Castiel turns around and notices Hannah seems distraught, he asks her what's the matter. She sighs and closes her eyes before answering.

"Metatron is dead."

"Dead?", shouts Castiel, "How can he be dead? Who killed him?". He pauses a second and adds "Where is Gadriel?"

Hannah shakes her head and replies

"Gadriel didn't hurt him. He's in Heaven, trying to calm everyone down. Metatron died of... I can't really say. His Grace... his Grace just... burnt out".

She sits down and adds "Is this what's coming to us?" and neither Castiel or Sam know what to say.

Sam tries to think this through. If Metatron was given his Grace by God... if God was the one to give Castiel his back, it means God is able to create them, to manipulate them and certainly to take them away.

"Could it be... God?" asks Sam.

"What do you mean?" says Hannah.

Sam explains what Castiel has discovered, the fact that Metatron used to be a human. Maybe he knew too much, maybe he knew things God doesn't want the angels to learn? Castiel frowns.

"Maybe not" he says. "Metatron drew his increased powers from the Angel Tablet and I broke it... Gadriel? Gadriel please come down."

Gadriel appears, and he looks even more troubled than Hannah.

"Metatron's dead... I tried... I tried to help him but there was nothing to be done"

He explains that when it happened, he was in Metatron's cell, trying to know if it was true, if he was a human before being an angel. Apparently, he's read the same book Cas read, and wanted to check the facts with Metatron before mentioning it.

"He told me... He told me it was true. He said God tricked him... I don't even know... what he meant. Everything happened so fast..."

Metatron told Gadriel that he didn't care about anything anymore, because he knew he wasn't going to live long. Gadriel tried to reassure him, telling him Castiel guaranteed his safety, but the scribe laughed and said that Castiel wouldn't be able to do anything against what was coming. He also said it was true, that he was Enoch, son of Jared, a human, coming from a tribe who had, those were his words, "remained faithful to God and his angels, and refused to live with the Elohim".

"With the Elohim? What the Hell did he mean? Elohim means God" says Sam

Gadriel goes on and says Metatron accepted to keep God's secrets, immensely honored by his attention. But when he began to write the tablets, he found out

"And I'm sorry for what I'm going to say, but he said... He said he found out that God was nothing but a wizard, the mighty wizard of Oz, he said, and that we..."

Castiel and Hannah look at Gadriel who seems almost in shock. Hannah whispers "What... what did he say?"

"He said we were all abominations. He said he threw us all out of Heaven because he wanted to... destroy it. He said the Earth didn't need it."

Sam frowns

"So... what made him change his mind?"

Gadriel bites his lip and says

"The power...I guess it's intoxicating for anyone. And then he said it didn't matter, because the Angel Tablet was destroyed and that it was going to kill him."

Castiel asks

"Why?"

"Because he linked his Grace to the Tablet to acquire more power, and when you broke it... you created an... injury? That was impossible to heal... That's what he said."

Castiel looks terrible and he whispers he had no idea destroying the Tablet would have that kind of effect. Sam whispers

"It's magic..."

Hannah asks him to explain himself

"It's just like... the First Blade or... the bone we used to kill Dick Roman it's... a spell. Linking your body or... your soul to an object... So that object gives you power..."

He continues by making a parallel with what Cain told him about God being the oldest wizard, which is more or less what Metatron said.

"The wizard of Oz was a scam", Sam adds, "So what? God isn't really God? What did he mean?"

Gadriel shakes his head

"I don't know. Before he died he just said he should never have left his village, and then... his Grace began to burn out..."

Castiel whispers "abominations" and feels extremely confused by what he's just heard. Metatron fled to Earth at some point, and so did Gabriel, to escape the "constant fighting" between Michael, Lucifer and God. He went as far as disguising himself in a pagan God and when he thinks about it, no one knows why or exactly when God disappeared. It's known for a fact that he's gone, but Castiel's never heard how it happened or when.

"Did he tell you anything about how we could restore our power?" asks Castiel

Gadriel looks worried

"No. He said he wouldn't help us, he said... He said we were doomed to disappear..."

Hannah rises and tells Castiel

"Commander, I think we should keep this information secret for now. Heaven is barely working."

Castiel nods

"You're right. We can't tell such a terrible news when we don't know what to do about it yet."

The angel then tells Hannah about the Tablets Gadriel has brought, and the upcoming arrival of Kevin Tran. She looks a little relieved when she hears there might be a way to find God and save Heaven. Castiel then asks her if she's heard anything from Crowley or Dean.

"I have... informants, keeping me updated... I thought you'd appreciate it", she says, and smiles at Castiel approving expression. Sam looks at her with a worried look, and Hannah notices. She tries to smile to him but she knows what she's going to tell him won't be pleasant to hear.

"Crowley has begun executing Abaddon's followers." she says, carefully. "My informant told me that his... 'wing man', I quote, was the most powerful", she hesitates, "demon they'd seen in years".

Sam tries to remain calm when inside, he feels like punching a wall. Crowley didn't wait before putting Dean to work, before making him his executioner. He feels strangled by anxiety. Does Dean like it? Has he really turned into a Knight of Hell? He feels Hannah's hand on his shoulder.

"He hasn't killed any human, for what I was told. There's still... hope, Sam. Dean might not be lost yet."

Sam closes his eyes, breathes in and thanks Hannah for her kind words. But his heart aches for Dean. He wants to be close to him, he wants to see him, he wants to kiss him. Oh God... This has always been his worst nightmare. Going back to Hell, going back to that place where he was so badly tortured. Becoming a demon, drowning inside himself, inside his pain... How long has he been fleeing from this malediction? And why Sam was unable to protect him again?

Hannah coughs, a little embarrassed, and tells Castiel she needs to go back to Heaven, and she looks insistently at Gadriel so he comes with her. Once they're alone, Castiel hugs Sam, and even if it a little awkward, it feels nice and Sam hugs him back. He manages to say "He's gonna be ok, is he?", terribly needing Cas to say yes, even if he doesn't believe a word of it, and the angel understands and tells him that he will, that they have the best team working for that. Sam fights again the tears coming to his eyes and says

"The worst thing is not knowing... where he is... how he is..."

Cas taps his shoulder and tells him they will soon know. And at that moment, they hear steps on the stairs. Kevin has arrived with his mother, and his first move, when he sees Sam's red eyes and his terrible expression, is to walk to him, hug him and tell him it's good to see him. Sam hugs him and tears are falling, because he spent weeks feeling terrible about Kevin's death, dreaming about being trapped in his own body, forced to witness himself killing the young prophet. He manages to tell Kevin it's awesome to see him alive and well, and Kevin smiles at Sam and says "We'll find Dean, don't worry Sam ok?".

Sam wipes his eyes, and manages to greet Mrs Tran, who's right behind her son, carrying a suitcase and a big bag of groceries. She gives him a quick hug, and then asks

"Sam, dear, when was the last time you ate?"

Sam frowns, he frankly doesn't remember when was the last time he ate something else than bourbon and cigarette smoke.

"I... don't know..."

Linda turns to Castiel and gives him a very angry stare, so angry that the angels seems startled, and then she looks at Kevin and says

"You see why I had to come?"

Kevin smiles and rolls his eyes a little, saying "I'll be in my room all right?", taking his and his mother's suitcase. Castiel awkwardly apologizes,

"I uh... forgot about the food..." and Linda says

"Don't worry anymore, I'm here. I can take care of two boys you know. You on the other hand, need to take care of the mess that was made in Heaven. So why don't you go there while I'm feeding this one back to health?"

Castiel looks at Sam, a little embarrassed, and Sam tells him

"It's ok Cas, I'll be fine, really and uh... thank you."

"For what?"

"For watching over me... I uh... really appreciate it."

Castiel comes close to Sam and puts his hand on his shoulder

"I tried to do... what Dean would have done... well not the... but you know..."

Sam laughs and says

"I know Cas, I know.", he smiles, "thank you."

In the kitchen, Linda yells "Boys! Dinner!" and Sam hears Kevin shouting back "Coming!"

Castiel smiles and says "I think you're in good hands. I'm going to go to Heaven for a little while, see what you can learn with... Saskia? Is that it? About the Mark."

"I'll do that" replies Sam

"Sam! Dinner!" shouts Linda again

"I think your presence is requested" says Castiel and Sam laughs, while walking to the kitchen. He looks at Kevin, sit down at the table, while Linda is giving him a big plate of pasta alla bolognese and he feels a little melancholic. It's always like this when he thinks about his mother, about the family he never had. But before he could dwell more in his nostalgia he hears again.

"Sam? Come on in and eat your pasta you're so pale you look like you're going to faint"

Kevin says

"Mom come on he's not twelve all right?"

And Sam replies

"No, no... it's ok"

It's even more than ok.


	6. Power Up

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

Crowley is sit in the snow, and Dean is standing a few feet away, the Blade tucked in the back of his jeans. He doesn't say a word. He's been bloody silent since the he was reborn, and that's clearly a pain in the arse. Yes he's a skilled executioner, yes his powers grow everyday, but he's not... the funny partner in crime Crowley hoped he would be, and he's pretty sure he can blame it on Moose.

"We're literally on the top of the world and you're not even excited?"

Dean turns around and looks at Crowley with contempt. No he's not excited. Mount Everest or not. Crowley's not the one he wants to travel with. The second he opened his eyes in that room he knew something was wrong. He saw absolutely perfectly, when the room was quite dark and heard every single sound. The sensation was so overwhelming he had to close his eyes a moment, and that's when he heard Sam's voice. He felt strange. Because even if his senses were perfectly accurate, his mind felt like he was in another... room. Like everything he heard, saw, or touched he sensed through a wall, or through a glass. When Sam came to him and held him, it was like he wasn't the one to touch him, like he was... wearing gloves.

The only vivid and real feeling he then felt was missing the Blade, and that... That...

It wasn't the first time he put something before Sam but this was the worst. Because he didn't want that he didn't want to be bound to a god damn donkey jawbone and certainly not to that fucking Crowley.

Crowley he would really like to skin alive with his Blade. But he can't, of course he can't, because if being a demon wasn't hard enough he also has to be Crowley's bitch.

"No, I'm not." he finally says, still turning his back on Crowley.

He remembers Sam's words. "I'll save you". But he hasn't heard from him since he left and he hopes, he really hopes Sam doesn't do anything stupid like summoning him, because if Crowley orders him to kill Sam then there will be nothing able to stop him. Nothing. Sam is intelligent enough to have thought about this but still, he knows how he is when he's concerned. He knows how self destructive he can be in that kind of situation so please... Please Sammy, don't go on a suicide mission, don't do anything stupid and...don't leave me here with him.

"Well, if you want I still have a couple... hundreds of Abaddon's worshipers you could execute. I gathered killing was the only thing pleasing you these days"

Dean turns around and says

"Executing **demons** pleases me", while looking at Crowley with the coldest stare possible.

Crowley's quite disappointed. He remembered what he was told about Cain and Dean isn't quite the bloodthirsty leader he expected him to be. He's just like the man he used to be, except he's absolutely not fun anymore and he respects his orders. Maybe he needs time. Maybe he needs to kill more, to... power up the Mark, who knows?

Dean looks at the landscape around him, and if he was human, he knows he would think it's mesmerizing. All around, there are only shiny mountain tops covered in the whitest snow he has ever see. The sky is pale blue, and if he could feel the cold he's pretty sure he would be frozen. Sam would love that. He went skiing with Jess once and he told Dean he would teach him one day. One day...

He would like so bad to ask Crowley if there has been any sign of Sam, or Cas, but he doesn't dare. He doesn't want his attention to be turned to the people he love.

"I had some news about Heaven" says Crowley, hoping to gain some reaction from Dean.

"What?" he asks, trying to keep calm

"Our friend with the trench coat is ruling it, quite well, from what I heard. But it's still collapsing."

Dean clenches his fists

"Apparently Metatron triggered something which could be the destruction of Heaven. You know what it means?"

"No."

Crowley sighs at Dean's lack of interest.

"It means we won't even have to bring Heaven down. It's going to collapse on its own. And when it has, I will be the only true King."

Dean turns around, angry

"Calm down King Joffrey, Cas ain't dead, Sam ain't dead, I..."

He stops, calling himself stupid for bringing Sam into the conversation. Crowley gets up and walks towards him, with something evil in his eyes.

"If you think I won't ask you to cut your brother's head the moment he tries to do something against me, then you're wrong. For what I know, he's been hiding in your bunker since you left and if I were you, I'd pray for him to stay there because if he goes out and try to mingle in my affairs... He'll be on your list, capiche?"

Dean nods.

"You should try to enjoy your new life instead of dwelling in the past mate." adds Crowley, "you could do great if you were not so fond of", he makes a disgusted face, "your feelings".

Dean looks at him with nothing but hate and thinks he really has to warn Sam about not making himself noticed by Crowley's agents. But who could help him do that? What friend can he possibly have in Hell?

* * *

Holy mother of shit! God damn it!"

A female voice is shouting from one of the rooms, and Linda almost chokes on her pastas. Sam recognized Saskia's voice and runs to her room, only to see her on the floor, covered by books and clothes and boxes and... stuff.

"I really have to figure out a way to make things come tidy and not on my damn face" she says, getting up, and seeing her like this makes Sam burst out laughing. Saskia protests, saying it's really not funny, but Sam can't stop and has to sit. It's been ages since he didn't laugh like this, and it feels incredibly good. Kevin and Linda arrive and their surprised stare show how stunned they are to see the mess the former empty room has been turned into.

"Hi I'm Saskia" says the young witch, walking towards Kevin. Kevin stares at her for a moment before answering. She's a little smaller than him, and is quite thin. Her blond hair is gathered in a messy bun on top of her head, and she has long bangs almost hiding her eyes. She's dressed very simply, with a pair of jeans, a white tanktop and an old leather jacket, and she could look like any other twenty something blond girl if there wasn't something... he can't quite put a name on it, about her. It's like... what he feels when he's close to a Tablet... it's like...

"You can see my magic?" she asks

Kevins stutters

"What?"

"You've been staring at me for the last minute and I'm not Scarlett Johansson so..."

Saskia smiles, and Sam introduces her to Kevin and his mother. Saskia makes the same ecstatic grin she made when she met Castiel when she hears Kevin is a Prophet. On the other hand, the Trekky inside Kevin is really excited when she explains to him how she brought her things to the bunker.

"You can actually teleport yourself? That's so cool!"

"Well it's a complicated spell and it asks a lot of energy but... yeah that's really cool"

Saskia turns to her things and asks Kevin if he wants to see something cooler. She mutters something he can't really hear and suddenly, all her things find a place in the room. Sam whispers

"There's a spell for everything..."

Reminding Magnus's words when they came to his house retrieve the Blade. Maybe he should talk to Saskia about that, about his hidden house and all the objects inside it. They didn't care about it that much after Dean killed him, but there were a lot of objects and books they could bring back to the bunker. Maybe Magnus kept some documents about the Blade. Why didn't he think about it earlier? Well he would have probably been unable to understand any of it, or so. He's so lost in his thought he doesn't hear Saskia and Kevin laughing about her Mary Poppins' spell, as Kevin just called it, saying he would have loved to know how to do that when he was a kid. Linda nods and laughs with them before she notices Sam's expression.

"You ok Sam?"

Sam blinks and says he's fine. Linda asks Saskia if she's had dinner yet, and as she hasn't, they all go back to the kitchen. On the way, Saskia grabs Sam's arm and tells him

"I'm surprised he can't see yours."

Sam turns to her and say

"Mine?"

"Your magic. Your power. It's well hidden but it's here. I see it" she answers, in a smile, before entering the kitchen. Sam wonders what she's talking about. The only powers he's ever had were those he was given by Azazel. And he doesn't have them anymore so why does she...? They definitely have to talk about this later, but in private. Life is complicated enough right now without him still having any kind of demonic powers. Instead, he asks her what she knows about weapons like the First Blade, weapons bound to their owner.

"There are several type of weapons like this", answers Saskia, "they can be bound to your body, to your soul, to your power if you have one..."

Saskia explains those weapons demand a sacrifice. You have to give something precious to receive their power, that's what is used as an anchor for the weapon.

"The stronger the weapon is, the deeper the anchor must be, especially if you want to use a power that is far greater than yours."

Sam tells her about Metatron and the Angel Tablet, and Saskia nods.

"That's a good example. He linked his Grace, and his life to the Tablet. It's like... ripping your heart out to replace it with an artificial one, you see? These objects make you completely dependent."

Sam asks "And what about the First Blade?"

Saskia eats a mouthful of pastas and answers

"Well, I can't really tell you since I haven't studied it yet, but from what you told me, it's not the weapon that's strong, it's the Mark. But the weapon is at least body linked, I suppose also soul linked."

Sam asks her why she thinks it's soul-linked, and Saskia explains him that sibling sacrifice is something known in dark magic.

"Sacrificing your brother or your sister is a way to acquire power, just like sacrificing your child. You give up what you love most so you can get a stronger power. And the pain you inflict yourself by doing that creates a... scar? On your soul. That scar is the anchor."

Sam nods, but something isn't right

"Yeah but Dean was given the Mark... Cain said the Mark could be transferred to someone worthy..."

Saskia takes a minute to think and says

"Worthy... It could mean someone with a similar scar on his soul. Did your brother do something that could have created that kind of scar? Like... Cain was a righteous man right? He didn't kill his brother to acquire a power he did it to... save him. So did Dean... have a similar experience?"

Sam sighs

"He went to Hell, because he made a deal to save my life."

Saskia looks at Sam, and when she sees Sam's sad eyes, she feels terrible for asking.

"That uh... could be the anchor... But hum... I'm not sure. And my father accepted to give us a hand with that so..."

Sam looks at Saskia and thanks her for her help. She seems to feel bad about what she said, but she doesn't have to. He could have guessed himself and actually, he kinda did. Hell made Dean worthy of bearing the Mark. He remembers Dean's expression when he said "worthy", when he told him what Cain had said. Sam thought he'd seen a hint of pride in his eyes, as if by "worthy" Cain had meant "great warrior"or something. If Dean had known it meant someone whose soul is damaged enough to anchor a terribly dark power, what would he have done?

"Saskia I'd like to show you something tomorrow. The house of the man who used to possess the First Blade. He was a warlock, and a collector, he had a lot of objects and books... maybe you can find something there about the Blade?"

Saskia smiles, a little relieved and says "No problem".

The evening finishes well, and everybody goes to bed early. Kevin decided to study the Tablets first thing in the morning, and he feels already excited about what he's going to find out. That's silly how he used to hate being a prophet, and now he's thrilled to be part of a new adventure. Sam laughs when he tells him "I feel like Bilbo Baggins", and it's nice to see him look a little better. It's not been a week since Dean disappeared, and Sam is really handling things well. He remembers how Sam left everything and everyone after Dean went to Purgatory, how he stopped answering his phone. Kevin was pretty angry at him then, but he didn't know... he didn't know who Sam and Dean actually were to each other. And now he does, he understands why Sam reacted the way he did back then. He'd love to have the words to comfort him, but he really doesn't, and he hopes he won't wake up one morning with Sam being gone.

In his room, Sam's in his bed but he can't sleep. He didn't expect to be able to anyway. Whenever he's alone he thinks about Dean. Maybe he could try to summon him. To trap him in a devil's trap, until they know more. And even if he knows it's a bad idea - Cain was never captured by anyone and there must be a reason for that - he can't stop himself from wanting to try. Suddenly, he hears someone knock on his door, it's Saskia, with a smoking tea cup in her hand.

"I thought you might need something to sleep" she says, sitting on Sam's bed. Sam smiles

"Is that the thing you made me drink last time?"

Saskia laughs

"No, it's not. This is just herbal tea it's uh... Saint-John's Wort, valerian, passiflora, and...", she takes a little paper bag out of her pocket, "this is a crushed amethyst, it's against nightmares". She pours the purple powder in her hands and closes her eyes.

"It... glows..." says Sam

Saskia opens her eyes

"You can see the glow? That's a good sign!" and she pours it in the tea, before handing the cup to Sam. He drinks it slowly, and it tastes like honey. After a minute, he feels better and his mind isn't filled with anxiety anymore. He even feels sleepy, and before he can say anything to Saskia, she has turned the lights off and left his room.

In the morning, they both drive to Magnus's house. Before that, Saskia asked Sam if there was a room were they could store all the things they would find and he showed her where he summoned Crowley a few days ago. Saskia instantly noticed the Devil's Trap was scratched and repaired it with red paint, while Sam was tidying up all the stuff he left on the ground and never picked up after that terrible night.

"Is that... blood?" said Saskia pointing to a corner of the room.

Sam came closer and said

"Yeah... looks like someone... threw up, I didn't see that... Oh my god, Dean..." he said, crouching.

Saskia crouched beside him

"He was sick?"

"No I... I don't think he was... but he said..."

He explained Saskia what Dean told him before he died, that the Blade was turning him into something he didn't want to be. Could this transformation involve him throwing up blood? Saskia sighed.

"I don't think that's what he meant... You said Cain told you that he tried to kill himself with the Blade, right? Well maybe the Blade... forces you to kill. If you don't kill then you get sick. Your brother was locked up here right? So he couldn't kill..."

Sam opened his eyes wide

"That's why Cain said that killing yourself was part of the spell. The Blade pushes you to do it..."

Saskia nodded

"Exactly. I think the spell requires a righteous soul, and a righteous person will always choose to take her own life rather than escaping death through killing innocent people."

Sam wondered if Crowley knew about this part of the spell, and when he asked Saskia if the fact that Dean was murdered could influence the success of the spell, she answers

"Magic is precision. He needed to die to be reborn as a demon but the sacrifice was important. If the... King of Hell doesn't know that, then we have an advantage Sam, that's good news."

When they arrive at the location of Magnus's house, Sam takes out the car a box of various things he used to open the door last time. Saskia finds it on her own, and turns around it, brushing her fingers on what appears to be thin air.

"This is quite strong" she says, "that... Magnus, he was a warlock you said?"

Sam replies, while installing the ingredients on the ground,

"Yeah why?"

Saskia stares at the door

"The spell... it's a concealing spell right? What language?"

Sam looks at the papers he brought and answers

"Latin, it's ingressum domi dona mihi"

Saskia whispers

"Give me the entrance to the house"

Sam begins to put the ingredients in a bowl and Saskia says

"I think we can open it without... all this, come."

Sam rises, surprised and walks towards Saskia.

"What do you mean?"

She looks at him and says

"Rudi would say this man wasn't a warlock Sam. He was a... magician. He knew spells, he knew magic but he had no power of his own. And no spell beats true magic like the one I have, and the one you have."

"I don't have..."

"Doesn't matter how you call it Sam", she adds, smiling, "you're stronger than this spell, you can break it. You just need a little... power up. Hold my hand"

Sam holds Saskia's hand and he feels a tingle, just like a little electric shock, and then a... heatwave, going up his arm and then irradiating his whole body. He feels his forehead burn, as if he had a sudden fever, and he touches it incredulously, eyes closed.

"It's your third eye Sam, now look at the door"

Sam opens his eyes and sees... the door. Where there was nothing a minute earlier, there is now a closed wooden door, glowing.

"You see it now right? So put your hand on the handle, good, and focus on what you want"

Sam breathes in, closes his eyes and say

"I want the door to open"

Saskia tighten her grip on his hand and the energy flow gets stronger.

"Now say your incantation, out loud."

Sam tries to remain focused and says

"Ingressum domi dona mihi"

The door opens, and Sam whispers "it worked... it actually worked...". Saskia lets his hand go and he sits on a chair, seemingly exhausted. She congratulates him, telling him it's normal he feels tired. But at this moment, Sam sees two werewolves running towards them with their claws out and crazy eyes. He pushes Saskia behind him and gets out his knife, but before he can do anything, the witch has moved extremely fast and is standing in front of him, telling him to stay back.

Sam grabs her arm, and when Saskia turns to him, saying everything is fine, her eyes have changed colors.

They're bright amber, with an S shape crossing the pupil.

And in both Saskia's hand, there is a fire ball.

In shock, Sam falls back into his chair while Saskia is pinning the two weres on the ceiling before burning them. She then takes back her fire inside herself, thinking it was quite easy. She wasn't expecting two angry and hungry werewolves to attack them though. She wishes she could have reasoned with them but they were too far gone. She rubs her hands and comes back to Sam who's staring at her with fear and anger asking

"Who the hell are you?"

Saskia doesn't understand.

"I thought you knew"

* * *

"So, Dean, have you thought about the people you'd like to have in your faithful garrison? Tell me a name, anyone you want."

Dean has given a lot of thinking to the choice of his team. Let's face it, his main problem is Crowley, he's bound to the son of a bitch, and as long as he's around, he won't ever be free of doing anything. So, he needs him dead, or at least locked away somewhere. And who hates Crowley enough to help Dean destroy him? Who in Hell would do anything, anything to get her revenge on the Scottish bastard?

"Meg, I want Meg."


	7. Knights

"Know what?" Sam says, taking out his gun, "you're dead! We killed you years ago!"

Saskia walks to him slowly saying "I'm not Azazel Sam, I'm like you, I'm one of his... children."

Sam stops moving.

"What? No... they're all dead. And you were not in the house with us, I would have remembered you"

Saskia sits on the ground and said

"That's because I wasn't there. You remember my tattoo? My cherry tree tattoo? My mother made it to protect me from Azazel. To conceal me."

Sam lowers his gun and stutters

"But how... How come you..."

Saskia sighes

"My mother made a deal to save my life. I was resurrected with his blood."

"Did Dean... Knew about this?"

Saskia shrugs her shoulders

"Well of course. I actually thought it was the reason you called me. I told him everything while you were sleeping"

Saskia doesn't feel like telling Sam everything about her life. She knows the effect her life story can have on people, and he doesn't need to hear it yet. Maybe later, when he'll trust her more. She just tells him she fled her group when she was sixteen, because the other hunters used her like a tool. When she arrived in Maine, she was adopted by an old lady named Nan, and lived with her for seven years, until she died. Saskia tried to live normally in North Kingston, even getting engaged, but began to ask herself questions about her choices when Nan died, leaving her everything she had ever owned. Even if she had then everything to start anew, somehow, this life didn't feel right, but she couldn't say why. She began to hunt again so she could buy old but cheap objects that used to be cursed, and that's how they met her, when she had bought a haunted wardrobe. Haunted by a ghost who almost killed the brothers.

"I remember that", said Sam, "It was vicious"

Then, when the brothers left, Saskia realized there was no way she could go on living without knowing who she really was. As Dean had given her Garth's contact, she was able to find Pivnik, an man she knew from her hunting days, and then to be reunited with Rudi, her adoptive father her mother had erased from her memory because he didn't agree with Saskia's mother education. She decided to get rid of her tattoo and to train properly, first learning to fully control her ability and then letting Rudi teach her everything he knew.

She doesn't say anything about how abused she'd been for years. She doesn't talk about Logan, about the rape, and she doesn't say a word about the Fire. About how she burnt her whole group the first time her Fire overcame the tattoo that was also made to prevent Saskia from using her powers on humans. He doesn't have to know all that yet. It's too soon.

"So... I suppose it was kind of a... blessing in disguise that your fiancé decided to cancel the wedding?"

Saskia sighs

"Uuh not really. I'm the one who left I...", she stops, bites her lip and finishes, "I changed his memories so I could change my mind and come back without everyone hating me"

She makes an embarrassed smile and looks at Sam, who's scratching his scalp.

"Well Nicole's not happy with your break up"

Saskia laughs

"Yeah I know. You talked to her? And you survived?"

Sam smiles and then she asks, more seriously

"So... what do you want to do now? Do you want me to go?"

Sam gets up and says he is sorry. Sorry about threatening her, about treating her like a monster.

"I've been there", he adds, "I know what it feels like. You came to help me literally the minute I called you so... I'm not the one to tell you if you stay or not. You are."

Saskia gets up and walks away, staring at the paintings and objects exposed in the hallway.

"You trusted me back then" she says, "when I made you open the door, you trusted me, you did it. Why?"

Sam takes a minute to think. He did listen to hear, he let her convince him he had a power, that he could do it.

"I don't know, I just felt like it was... right?"

Saskia turns around and looks at him

"It is. Sam, we share something, you and I. We have a connection. I feel it, you feel it. I can help you develop your power, I can help you training. When I was reunited with my ability it... cured me. It made me feel whole. Don't be ashamed of who you are"

"It's not that simple" he says, entering Magnus's library.

While searching for interesting books, he begins to tell her about Ruby and the demon blood. How he liked the feeling of the power running through his veins, the feeling of being in control. He tells her about how terrible his mistake was, what it triggered. The Apocalypse, no less. And Dean not trusting him anymore. Which was maybe the worst. His power frightens him, he doesn't want to have any of it.

"Well that's an impressive resume" says Saskia, before gently smiling. "Don't beat yourself up too hard. Demon Blood is highly addictive and it's poison. You owe it to your magic to have survived ingesting so much."

"I could have died?" Sam asks, incredulous

"Yeah..." replies Saskia, "I'm actually surprised you survived, to be honest."

Sam tells Saskia about how he was miraculously cured after killing Lilith, how "scrubbed clean" he had felt.

"Well, that's maybe a good sign. If we need to find "God" or whoever he is, if he's already intervened in your favor well..."

"So you're staying?"

Saskia smiles

"Of course I'm staying. Cain said you needed a witch, I'm a witch. So, let's research. But Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"If you didn't know who I was, you called me just because... I'm the only witch you knew?"

Sam sighs

"I was kinda desperate"

She laughs

"Dude! Well you're lucky. And think about training all right? This power is a part of you. Rediscovering mine healed me."

"Healed you... from what?"

Sam looks at Saskia and notices her expression has changed. She looks older, and has something very melancholic in her eyes. She just answers

"Life."

And goes on searching.

* * *

"Kev? How's that translation?"

Kevin can't quite answer his mother because there is no word to describe what he's reading. Since he began translating the first sentences, he's been hoping to be wrong. If that Tablet says the truth, then it means everything he knows about humanity, heaven, hell and basically, the whole world, is wrong. And it's a crushing feeling. He doesn't even know how that's gonna help Sam, or Cas. He hasn't found a way to contact God yet, maybe it's in another Tablet, and the one he's translating could probably start a nervous break down in Heaven.

How do you say to someone that all his memories have been wiped out and replaced by lies?

He hasn't been raised in a religious environment but it's still hard to read what he's reading. God's words. Did he really wanted someone to read that? What kind of solace, of solution something like this could bring? Did God ever wondered? Basically writing something like this something so... terrible.

"Kev? I'm talking to you."

"Yeah it's fine. I don't have uh... something understandable yet but it's fine Mom"

Maybe he should try to translate another Tablet and to forget this one. After all if they do find God, maybe he can tell them himself what he did. He puts the tablet away and takes another one, entitled "The Sacred Cauldron". That looks funnier, let's see.

* * *

"Hey Dean... It's been a while... So... You came out of the closet?"

Meg is tied to a torture rack, and she still looks the same than when he last saw her. Her meatsuite must have died long ago but she still kept that appearance, with her bleached blond hear sticking to her face with blood. She's covered in bruises and scars, and must have spent the last years being terribly tortured. Dean would like to be able to feel bad for her, but he doesn't. First he doesn't seem to have a lot of feelings anymore, and second, it's Meg. She killed Ellen and Jo and that... That blew away any kind of sympathy he could ever have for her.

"Shut up."

He unties her, and she stands unsteadily on her feet. Dean orders her to get on her knees, and Meg gives her a cocky smile he dismisses with an expression of contempt.

"Repeat after me: I here swear fealty and do homage to the Crown of Hell"

Meg repeats, a little confused.

"I swear I will always be loyal to the bearer of the Mark"

She repeats again, looking at Dean with something which looks like fear. Are the rumors she heard true?

"Meg, you have been deemed fit for a high estate. Do you now swear on our King's name that you will honor and defend Hell?"

"I... I do, I guess." she says, hesitantly.

"Then having sworn these solemn oaths, know now that I, Dean Winchester, bearer of the Mark of Cain, and beholder of the First Blade, dub you with my sword..."

Dean takes out the first Blade and holds it above Meg's head

"Once for loyalty, twice for strength, thrice for mercilessness. Arise, Knight of Hell"

Meg gets up and is suddenly surrounded by a red smoke, like a tornado. She feels the smoke forcing the entry of her body, and she screams in pain as she feels herself burn from the inside. She looses consciousness, and when she wakes up, all her wounds are healed and she feels... she feels... extremely well.

"What the Hell just happened?" she says, looking incredulously at her cured limbs. Some kind of tremendous energy is running through her veins and she feels like she could eat the whole world. She begins to laugh, and the laugh becomes more and more ecstatic, almost hysterical. In the end, she's crying and laughing at the same time, rolling on the bloody floor, enjoying the smell and the taste of blood and desperately needing to kill something.

"I need to kill" she says, grinning

Dean crouches.

"Calm down, I know what you're feeling, but calm down. You'll get to kill all right, but not now. I need your help."

Meg gets up and says

"Whatever you want. Tell me, tell me what I have to do."

Dean grins and tell her his plan to get rid of Crowley, and Meg claps her hands like an evil child.

* * *

"I found something", says Sam, carrying a big volume on the table. "It might talk about the Mark and it's... bound with human skin, because of course it is."

"Yikes" replies Saskia, approaching carefully. "Let me see it", she runs her fingers on the cover, "It's ok there's no trick".

Sam begins to read the volume, called "Arma Antiqua et Diabolica", and is happy his latin isn't too rusty. Apparently, this book is the translation of several more ancient others. After flipping a few pages, he finally find one with "Ad Cain Signum" as a title. The chapter details the spell used to create the Mark and to bind the Blade to its owner. Cain had the right instincts, and the spell is as vicious as they supposed it would be. Sam decides to write it down.

"So let's see. The spell does require a righteous man, a righteous soul, and a sacrifice for what he thinks is the greater good."

Saskia looks at the book and adds

"That's what I suspected. By making the sacrifice, the righteous man creates a scar on his soul."

Sam continues writing and describes how the Mark is then apposed on the man's arm, anchored on the breach created by the sacrifice.

"The Mark is as you said body-bound, that's how it makes the bearer sick when he doesn't kill..."

"That is basic dark magic. Parasitism."

"And it's also soul-bound."

The Mark pushes the bearer to kill so it can use the energy of the lives it took to infect the entire physical body, thus making the bearer even more eager to kill, and even more sick if he stops.

"But as the power grows stronger, the bearer is also pushed to complete the spell by turning the Blade against himself."

"Second sacrifice."

The suicide of the bearer allows the Mark to deepen its anchor into his body and turn him into a demon, and to replace his soul by a new one, the Blade with an even greater power.

"This whole spell is a trick. The man kills his brother believing to do good, and actually it was a sacrifice so he could be a killer. And then he kills himself to set things straight, and in truth he was offering his soul to get a greater power"

"Twisting a soul creates a lot of energy Sam. But remember, Dean didn't do the last step, at least not completely."

Sam goes on. As a newborn demon, the Blade is bound to his master, the King of Hell and is nothing but blood thirst and loyalty. Even in that form, killing makes him stronger as the Mark swallows the life energy of the dead and use it to strengthen itself.

"Wait... If the Mark's influence gets stronger with every killing, then we should try to get your brother out of hell real quick."

Sam sits

"Because if he stays too long..."

Saskia crouches next to Sam

"I don't know if we'll be able to find God Sam. But with that book and Magnus's notes about the Blade, if we find them, maybe I can try to make a devil's trap powerful enough to imprison your brother."

Sam adds

"There's a cure... for demons... injecting them human blood, do you think that I could..."

Saskia sighs

"I don't know Sam. He's not any demon. And even if it worked, it wouldn't get him rid of the Blade, and then... not killing would kill him again."

Sam looks desperate, but Saskia insists

"We're going to bring that book back, with everything we can find, and the I'll call Rudi. We'll make a trap together. I don't think we can honestly bet too much money on the finding God here..."

Sam gets up and goes to Magnus's office

"We'll do that. Capture him. Find a way to stop the Mark from spreading... And Saskia?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm really interested in that training you talked about."

After an day spent researching for documents about the Blade, Sam drove back to the bunker and Saskia modified the house's door to transform it into a portal to the bunker. She got rid of Magnus's body, and all the other creature's, and worked at undoing all the spells he had put in his house to trap or kill unwanted visitors. She then spent a few days gathering all the information she needed about the Mark and the Blade, taking also some time to begin Sam's training. And as he already knew a few things about magic, he was a fast learner. But his power was still very weak and she knew she needed help to awaken it.

She called Rudi so he could come and help her design a trap and find a temporary solution to help Dean. Rudi was really happy to come though he wasn't fond of the idea to be trapped underground with people, it had been a long time since he last had an occasion to use his powers at their full extent. Training Sam seemed also very interesting, so he said he would gather a few books and come when he'd be ready.

When she got out of the house and walked into the bunker's storage room, she thought the place was way too silent, and she ran to the library, only to find Kevin, sit at the table, surrounded by papers, with his mother, Sam, Castiel, Gadriel and Hannah looking somewhat traumatized.

"What happened?" she says, worried.

"You're not gonna believe this"says Sam, "apparently we need to find the Grail"


	8. Amber

"The what?" asks Saskia, who's pretty sure she's heard "the Grail" but doesn't want to believe it.

"The fucking Grail" says Kevin, before correcting himself when he hears his mother cough. "The holy Grail".

"No shit...?" says the witch, and Linda abandons the idea of having anyone speaking correctly.

Kevin gets up and starts explaining what he's found in the Tablet he translated, the one entitled "The Sacred Cauldron".

"In the beginning, I wondered what it was about, because I really couldn't understand a thing. Basically, it talks about an object forged by God, a cauldron with a set of different powers"

The young Prophet explains the Tablet tells how God made the first heavenly artifact, a cauldron, or a jar, it's unclear, which contained the Elixir of Life. The Elixir of Life is supposed to give immortality, and anyone who looks at the inside of the Cauldron can see the world and its future.

"The tablet has several names for that object, Sacred Cauldron, Jar of Life, Jar of Immortality... The last part talks about how in the 'End', the 'King Who Failed' would sacrifice himself by drowning in the Elixir, to 'Purify the World and bring it to a new era'."

Saskia frowns, confused, and Kevin adds "Yeah I know, it makes no sense, but it started making some when Sam read it."

Sam explains

"There are several myths, in almost every part of the world, that talk about magic cups, jars or cauldrons that are supposed to bring power or immortality. The first one I thought about was an old Irish myth, the Dagda's Cauldron."

Saskia opens her eyes wide.

"Of course! The Dagda is the god of the druids! I remember that story."

Sam continues

"Well that myth was used by the Christian to forge another one, the Legend of the Holy Grail, the cup supposed to have received the blood of Jesus when he died. "

Saskia nods

"In the book, the real power of the Grail is to reveal something. The only knight who looked inside the Grail, Galaad, wished to die afterwards, because after what he saw he couldn't live anymore. So I thought about what Kev said, the fact that the 'Elixir' contains a knowledge that a human cannot handle."

The witch nods again but says "Yeah but I don't see..."

Kevin interrupts her

"That's when it becomes pure genius. You're a genius."

"Thanks Kev." says Sam, a little embarrassed "Well, I think the Grail is actually... God's vessel."

Saskia shouts, startled

"What? How?"

"Think about it, the cauldron basically symbolizes eternal life and knowledge. And it can also resurrect the dead. The medieval name of the Grail is Graal. A graal is a dish, all right, but there's also another name Sangreal which means..."

"Saint Graal?"

"Or Sang Real, Royal Blood"

Saskia looks skeptical

"That's getting a little Da Vinci Code here, no?"

Sam laughs

"A little maybe but... if the Elixir is the Royal Blood, who's the King?"

"God?"

"So the cup, or the cauldron or the jar... is the recipient of God's blood."

Saskia looks stunned and mutters "Oh dear...The Grail is the vessel that can hold... God's Grace?"

Sam smiles and says "I think so yeah."

Saskia laughs

"Kev's right, this is genius. Damn Sam, you deserve some vacation now dude."

Kevin gets up and high fives Sam and Saskia, when the angels remain terribly still.

"God is on Earth." whispers Castiel

Sam comes close to him and pats his shoulder

"Yeah Cas, Joshua told us, you remember?"

Cas doesn't look at him

"I do. But it was never... clear. Now we have proof. And he never made himself known to us. Many angels think he's dead."

Hannah continues

"God created a vessel... that could hold his Grace it means he planned... to leave us, to leave heaven. And what the part about the sacrifice means? Did he... sacrifice himself? When? Why? For what... purpose?"

She sits, looking traumatized. Gadriel sits close to her and takes her hand.

" I don't understand it more than you do sister. But if we wants those answers, then we need to find him. Kevin?"

"Yeah?" replies Kevin, visibly a little nervous.

"That's an excellent job you did, thank you very much."

"Uh ok thanks Gadriel." he says, while Linda gently hold his arm and pull him close to her. Gadriel sighs, says he has to leave and disappears. Linda snaps at Castiel.

"Why did you bring him here? That man murdered my son in cold blood."

Saskia looks at Sam, wondering what the Hell is going on.

"I'm sorry Mrs Tran but... Gadriel is the only angel left, with me, to have a full Grace. He sacrificed himself to save Heaven, and me, and God resurrected him he's... willing to redeem. He was... misguided."

Linda doesn't seem to feel any better.

"If he gets misguided again, I will kill him myself." she says, before adding, "Kevin decides if he wants to have him around or not, but frankly Castiel, you should have asked before bringing him here."

Hannah walks towards Linda and tells her she understands her feelings and she promises Kevin will be safe. Kevin intervenes

"Mom I won't say that I'm comfy around Gadriel for now but... For what I've seen... Angels are...", he tries to smile at Castiel, "soldiers... Gadriel had a bad commander and..."

Linda smiles at her son

"Honey, I can't tell you how many crimes were committed in the name of 'I was merely respecting orders'. People have a conscience. And my point is, do those people have?"

Castiel looks at his shoes, but Kevin defends him.

"They do, they try to have one of their own... Mom... Gadriel takes his orders from Castiel, and he brought me back so... Can we just... put everything aside? We need to be united if we want to succeed."

Linda swallows the tears coming to her eyes and she ruffles her son's hair

"As you like." she whispers, and she sees in Castiel's eyes a mix of guilt and admiration. Sam gives him a friendly pat on the shoulder that makes him jump, and everyone seems okay apart from Saskia who's discretely left the Library. Seeing Linda ready to defend her son, ready to kill an angel even if she perfectly knows she would be the one to die made her think about her mother, and now she needs, really needs to smoke. Maybe an entire packet.

Ellen, Leni, Rose... or Mama, when she was a kid. Ready to tattoo Saskia's back with her own blood to conceal her from Azazel, but unable to protect her from the violence of the group they lived with. She was never proud of her. She looked at her with a half weary, half scared gaze, even more when Saskia killed something or managed to do a perfect spell. She said "that's good", and then seemed to drown in anxiety.

She spent ten years trying to protect Saskia from herself, binding her power so she would never be able to attack humans, but she never thought for one minute that her daughter could suffer in the hands of others. That without her power, she was just a slender girl, unable to defend herself, and that her weakness would be used over and over again until she reached a point of no return. When Rudi took out her tattoo, and unleashed her powers, all her scars were healed. Outer scars. She doesn't have cigarette burns, or gunshot wounds, or knives scars, but the scars on her soul are still there. Sometimes she can't feel them, and sometimes they hurt like hell.

She lights a cigarette and is so lost in her thought she doesn't hear Sam came in.

"You're okay?" he says, gently, and he sees Saskia standing in a corner of the room, surrounded by smoke. Her hair is tied on top of her head and Sam notices her back is covered with... black birds.

"You have a new tattoo?" he adds, trying to make her react, and when she turns around, he can see her eyes flicker from green to amber and back to green. She whispers that she does, it's several protection spells hidden under nightingales.

"Sorry", she mumbles, "Family moments make me..." she rubs her eyes and tries to smile. "So uh... How do we find that Grail?"

Sam comes closer to her and ignores her question

"Me too." he says, trying to show her he understands. Saskia appreciates the intention, and discretely nods. It's not the time to dwell in painful memories, especially not for Sam who has enough on his plate.

"I'm fine", she says, "I'm just a little tired. To much reading!"

"Okay then, Linda's making tea for everybody and Kev is gonna tell us about the rest of the Tablet, come when you're ready."

Saskia smiles

"I'm ready.'

* * *

"Can I get you anything?"

It's not very brave and he knows it, but right after hearing for the second time that God is on Earth, and has actually planned his escape millenia's ago, Castiel didn't feel like hearing how they were supposed to find him. He thought for a moment that if he had God in front of him, he wouldn't be in awe, but would pretty much slap him and call him a son of a bitch, à la Dean.

So he asked Hannah to listen and to make him a report afterwards, pretexting he had to go to Heaven to supervise the questioning of the remaining of Metatron's followers. Truthfully he just wanted to be alone for a moment. Dean would know what to say, Dean would have something funny and spirited to qualify this situation.

"Sir?"

"No thank you" he mumbles, folding and unfolding his napkin.

He needs God's help to save Dean. He needs God's help to save Heaven, and frankly, he would really like to be able to do that on his own. He's maybe flawed, he made mistakes, but he wouldn't abandon all the people he cares about. Did God care?

"You seem gloomy Clarence, did someone break your halo?"

Castiel looks at the waitress, who casually sits in front of him. She looks maybe thirty, has long and curly red hair, and light blue eyes. She could look like the most innocent and kind woman, but her smirk betrays her real nature.

"Meg?"

She smiles and ruffles her hair with both her hands

"You like my new look?"

Castiel is stunned, last time he saw Meg, it was before he disappeared in Purgatory. When he came back, she was nowhere to be found, presumed dead, killed by Crowley. He wouldn't admit it in front of anybody, but he felt some kind of connection to Meg. She was maybe the only demon he thought would be able to redeem some day.

"But how... I thought..."

Meg sighs

"I was in Hell Clarence... And guess who freed me? Your boy toy! Well he's not much of a boy anymore. And if he's still a toy, he's not yours anymore."

Castiel mutters

"You saw Dean?"

"More than that", she says, showing him her wrist, burnt with "Knight" written in Enochian, "I've got a little special juice from him"

Castiel lowers his right hand and holds his angel blade.

"Don't worry. He sent me to talk to you, so listen, I don't have much time. We're gonna take down Crowley, my general and I. As long as he's around, Dean's his bitch."

Castiel nods and says he knows.

"How are you going to proceed?" he asks

"You don't have to know. The only thing Dean wants you to do is to protect his brother. Don't let Sam summon Dean or try to contact him, at any cost. And don't let him get out of the bunker."

Meg looks more like how she used to be, the few times they had a conversation. She seems concerned.

"Why?" says Castiel, bending a little over the table.

"Crowley said that if Sam tried anything against him, he would make Dean kill his brother. So give us a little time."

Castiel bites his lip

"How is he?"

Meg tilts her head and says, looking a little sarcastic

"Pretty resentful... But he's still himself if that's what you were wondering. Don't worry too much, he's the most powerful demon I've ever seen."

At this moment, Castiel notices everyone in the coffee shop has stopped moving. Meg turns around and sighs.

"Apparently I've been followed"

A male demon yells "capture her! Inform the king!"

Before Cas can do anything, Meg's eyes have turned black and she has a short blade in her hand. She begins to kill the demons one by one, with tremendous strength. She even manages to catch a black smoke and to shove it back into a human body before stabbing it several times with her weapon. Her face covered with blood, she turns to Castiel and says

"Protect Sam and wait for my heads up before you do anything ok? Take care Clarence."

Before vanishing.

* * *

"We have to do... quests?"

Kevin explains that's what he gathered from the rest of the tablet. The problem is the content of the quests is not explained.

"It only talks about um... 'looking for the castle' or house it's unclear... 'hidden in the secret mirror'... "

Sam rolls his eyes

"Why do they have to be cryptic like this all the damn time?"

"Because they're assholes?" says Saskia, while chewing on an apple. She managed to calm herself and to come back to the Library. "That wouldn't be fun if it wasn't a little complicated" she adds.

A deep male voice adds

"And now you have one more person to help"

Sam turns around and sees a sixty-something tall man, with grey-blond hair, and mischievous grey eyes.

"I'm Rudger, Saskia's father, but you can call me Rudi."

Sam walks towards him and shakes his hand. Rudi stares at him from head to toe and says

"You were right sweety, he does have an interesting power. I'm surprised you didn't feel the seal though."

Saskia comes closer and says "What seal?"

"Well hidden, but not so well for the trained eye, do you want it removed Sam? Saskia said your power wasn't dangerous to humans."

Sam hesitates. He's still frightened by his old abilities, by what it made of him. But these last days, while practicing with Saskia he felt like someone who had been trapped in a wheel chair and was suddenly able to walk a few steps again. He had always thought this feeling of powerlessness he had been bearing for so many years came from his inability to protect Dean, from his inability to be the person his father, as much as he resents him, wanted him to be. Practicing basic magic, feeling this very special heat running through his veins made him feel, somehow better, hopeful even. It scared him a little of course, because when he was "training" with Ruby, he had more or less the same feeling, this conviction he had the ability to save the world, to save Dean. But with Saskia, there were no tricks, no demon blood, no deals just... basic homework. Plus she has a power way scarier than his as her whole body was resurrected with Azazel's blood, she could burn an entire city if she wanted and yet, she's kind and... normal. She's the living proof someone can grow up good and strong with her roots planted in a rotten soil.

When he asked her if his power could help Dean, she told him what he already knew, and she was right, he did. He just didn't want to admit it, he didn't want to see the guy who trusted Ruby in the mirror again, the Boy King, the one who started the Apocalypse.

But as she said, it's a part of him. And when his power was taken away, it made him weak and defenseless. You need to embrace your nature, she said, you need to be fully yourself, unafraid, unashamed. You need to be strong again so you can defend yourself and your brother. And who knows, maybe his ability could be useful to trap Dean if needed.

Sam looks at Rudi's eyes and sees nothing but kindness. He's the one who helped Saskia control her Fire, he doesn't see her, he doesn't see them as monsters but as, as Saskia said "miracles". To Rudi, she told him once, she is a miracle. She came back from the dead with enough power to kill hundreds of people, but she remained the same kind-hearted child she had always been. They conciliate light and dark magic in the most balanced way, and for that they are extraordinary.

"I... I want it removed, yes." he says, hesitantly, and Hannah cuts

"Sam are you sure..."

But before she can finish her sentence Rudi takes one of Sam's hands in his and asks Saskia to do the same, before taking her remaining hand. He closes his eyes and says

"We're forming this circle to free our brother, Sam, from the seal restraining his power"

Saskia closes her eyes, and so does Sam, who begins to feel his hands tingle, just like the time Saskia gave him a "power up" at Magnus's.

"Sam, I want you to focus, you hear me? The seal is placed on your heart, not your physical heart, but the energy point that's right there ok?" says Rudi, in a very calm voice.

"Ok" answers Sam, a little anxious.

"Now, visualize it, it's green, it irradiates, and there is a lock, right in the middle of it, you see it?"

Sam closes his eyes tighter and tries to imagine a green circle. Naturally he thinks of Dean's eyes, his deep green eyes, and he feels his chest becoming warmer and warmer. He visualizes a lock in the middle of the pupil. "I see it" he says, still a little hesitant.

"Good, now, Saskia and I are going to give you enough energy to open it. Just focus on the lock and repeat 'by the power of this circle I command you to release me' "

"How..." Sam opens his eyes a little, and sees Saskia and Rudi, eyes closed looking very focused. His arms are burning hot, and he begins to feel a little scared. Even more since Kevin has his eyes opened wide in what looks like shock, and so does Hannah.

Rudi opens his eyes and smiles to Sam before saying "Don't worry son, they just begin to see your energy, and there's a lot to see, believe me"

Sam nods, not really convinced. Rudi continues

"There's nothing to be afraid off, we're right here with you now, close your eyes, focus and r epeat 'by the power of this circle I command you to release me' "

Sam repeats a first time and he feels the energy flow in his body getting stronger. The second time, he says it with more intent and he begins to feel his head hurt a little. It's hard to remained focused on the image of Dean's eye, but the energy soon invades his heart and he feels lightheaded, like suddenly he's not completely there anymore.

"You're close" whispers Saskia, "Come on..."

Sam repeats the sentence a third time and he feels like he's been struck by thunder. His whole body jerks, and he feels extremely hot and extremely cold at the same time. He feels Saskia and Rudi have let his hands go, but the energy is still running wild in his veins, like an adrenaline rush but a hundred times stronger. He has trouble breathing and is gasping for air. He hears Linda yelling "What's wrong with him?" and Rudi saying with his impressive calm voice "Nothing. He broke the seal, and now he's hit with a tsunami of energy. Help me lie him down."

He feels several hands lifting him and carrying him to his bed, but it's like he's not even here. He's extremely conscious and unconscious at the same time, and most of all he feels extremely well. Healthy, strong, even somehow omniscient. After a minute, after hours, he cannot say, he wakes up with Saskia, Rudi, Kevin, Linda, Hannah and Castiel, who came right back from wherever he was, at his side.

"How do you feel?" asks Saskia, while taking his hand.

Sam sits, his eyes still closed and says

"I've never been better in years."

He opens his eyes.

They're bright amber.

With an S shape crossing the pupil.


	9. Unholy

"This is unholy"

Castiel is standing close to the edge of Sam's bed, and he has trouble containing his anger. He has just come back to the bunker, called by a very distraught Hannah, telling him the witch and her father were trying to revive Sam's powers. He had just left Meg, he had just promised her to protect Sam and here he was, failing before being even able to try. He should have seen. He shouldn't have let Sam invite this witch in. Witches are abominations, witches are opportunists, ready to do just anything to acquire more power, deals, sacrifices and who knows what else.

When he arrived to the bunker, Hannah was waiting for him, terribly anxious, apologizing over and over for not having been able to stop what had happened. She told him Sam went into some kind of seizure, and Castiel ran to his room, only to find him sit on his bed, holding the witch's hand, and saying he had never felt better in years. Kevin and Linda were standing in a corner of the room, visibly shocked, and when the angel walked closer to Sam he understood why. His eyes had changed color. They were golden, and the witch's too. She was smiling, telling Sam everything would be fine from now on, that he was whole again, and he fell right back into a deep sleep.

Then Saskia told him, apparently quite proud of herself that she and her father had managed to remove the seal which blocked Sam's magic."We're the same" she said, "I'm one of Azazel's children as well". He wanted to slap that smile out of her face, but he just muttered through his clenched teeth "You have no idea of what you've done", while looking at Sam. And then he added, with pure hatred in his eyes,

"This is unholy"

An older man is standing at the opposite corner of the room, and Castiel notices him at this moment. He is leaning against the wall, looking at him from across the room with an insolent gaze. Castiel remembers when Saskia saw him for the first time, how she could see his Grace and the look of pure adoration she had then. How it fooled him. But this man is different. Is he the father Hannah mentioned earlier? He stares at him with what looks like sarcasm, and he repeats, after a few seconds

"Unholy?"

With a contemptuous smirk, while he casually walks out of the room. Castiel follows him out, outraged and once they're far enough he snaps

"These powers triggered the Apocalypse. These powers were given to him by a demon and they destroyed him. They destroyed his brother and they almost destroyed the world."

Rudi sits in an armchair, and still look utterly unimpressed.

"They were sealed by God himself. What you did is pure blasphemy."

The warlock laughs.

"This seal wasn't made by your God, angel, or he's not very powerful for someone who's supposed to have created you. The kid made it."

Castiel frowns.

"Seal on the fourth shakra." he says, pointing at his heart, "He mentioned to Saskia that trusting a demon over his brother, Dean, is it? Broke his heart. Has he ever been... I don't now, sad, bitter, prone to self hate?"

The angel looks lost for a second and Rudi continues, sighing

"Effects of the seal. This kid has been so traumatized by what he did, that he unconsciously turned his own power against himself."

He gets up and starts walking around the library, adding

"You say his power is unholy because it comes from a demon, right?"

Castiel feels angry again and mutters

"What do you think?" fighting hard against his instinct to fry this man's brain for good.

"He's not dangerous to people. A demon gave him the power to smite demons. That's kind of ironic when you think about it, right?" he replies, with a cocky smile that strangely looks like Dean's. He sits back in his armchair, and points his index finger to the table. Suddenly, a pen flies from it, and floats in the air until it stops, right in front of the angel's eyes. Rudi snaps his fingers, and the pen breaks into two parts. Castiel jerks a bit.

"I was born with this power, and no demon blood was involved", says Rudi, "I can do that to pen, I can do that to bones."

He moves his fingers and the pen parts start to fly around the room before they stop again, this time in front of Rudi. He snaps his fingers again, and the pen turns to dust. He looks at Castiel, raising an eyebrow, and the angel mumbles, "This is..."

"Unholy?" he completes, smirking again.

* * *

"So, have you thought about your other recruits mate?" says Crowley, comfortably sat in a large leather armchair.

Dean is standing across the room, arms crossed and his black eyes on. Meg's come back a few minutes ago, and she told him she was followed by Crowley's minions. He doesn't like that. Crowley doesn't trust him, of course he doesn't, and the more wary he is, the less easy it's gonna be to get rid of the son of a witch.

"Not yet, though Meg has given me a few names."

Crowley lights up a huge Havana cigar, and exhales some smoke with a very content sigh

"Meg, Meg, Meg... I really don't understand your taste in girls Dean.", he says, "well, in boys either, I have to say."

Dean clenches his hand around his Blade and tries not to jump over that desk and slit the bastard's throat. He doesn't get to talk about Sam. Sam... Cas said he would protect him, that he would keep him safe inside the bunker, and since he has his juice back, he might succeed. Dean hopes Castiel will be subtle though, because if he pushes Sam too hard, Sam will slam the bunker's door in his face and call him an asshole. He has a long record of door slamming and dramatic leavings so please, please Cas, don't give him orders. He hates orders.

Dean had always thought demons had no souls, and therefore couldn't love. He was completely wrong or he is a very special demon. Because being away from Sam fucking kills him. He tries to forget the look on his face when he saw his eyes. He tries to forget his first days as a newborn demon, spent screaming his throat out while cutting heads, screaming his pain, his disgust, his anger, screaming for every single time he should have and he didn't. Killing brought him some kind of peace of mind. Or maybe it just makes him numb. But he feels way better now than two weeks ago, more focused, more powerful, and as a matter of fact, he kinda likes the fear in the demons' eyes when he walks through them. He used to be a denial jedi, now he can look coldly at all these memories which used to destroy him. All these memories he used to drown in bourbon so they wouldn't haunt him. He doesn't feel haunted anymore, he doesn't care about John, about the beatings, the fear, the despair, the loneliness. He can remember every single girl he fucked in back alleys and gloomy bathrooms without feeling disgusted. He can think about the couple of guys who sucked him for ten dollars when he was short on money without feeling like burning his brain.

The only thing that make him feel something is Sam. Sam memories are still very vivid. They make his veins burn and his heart, if he still has one, ache.

But he can't afford thinking too much about Sam right now, except to remember his words, "focus on the trajectory". I'm focusing, Sammy, I want Crowley dead or locked forever, and I think I just know how. Be patient babe, I'll be home soon.

"If I complete my Round Table... Can I ask you a favor?" he asks, trying to keep his voice calm and even

Crowley puts his cigar in the ashtray and looks at him with surprise

"Bloody Hell, that thing had a politeness program? Speak your mind mate, what do you want for that?"

Dean remembers how he used to practice looking carefree when he was younger, especially when Sam was gone and he had to pretend he didn't give a damn, when he was dying inside a little more every single day. When he didn't want John to figure out just how much, how much Sam was important to him. He relaxes his body, giving away no sign of tension or expectation and he answers

"I'd like you to get Adam out of Luci's cage."

Crowley laughs.

"Adam? You want me to crawl in the most dangerous cell in Hell to drag the little bastard out? You can't be serious Dean-o, he spent years as Michael and Lucifer's chew toy, I don't think there's anything left of him."

Dean rolls his eyes

"Why do you care? I just want him out. I don't ask you for a fucking Lamborghini or a night at the Playboy Mansion..."

"That would actually be easier..." cuts Crowley, "how do you think Hefner still has so much stamina? Anyway... All right."

Dean tilts his head.

"All right?"

Crowley gets up and walks towards him

"I'll get the little bugger out. But I want my dream team. We need to be strong if we want to bring Heaven down."

Dean jerks involuntarily

"I thought it was collapsing?"

Crowley shrugs his shoulders.

"It is. But not fast enough. Plus your feathery boyfriend is snooping a little too much these days." he smiles a wicked smile.

Dean tries to remain detached-looking, but he feels anxious. He doesn't care that much about Adam, he cares about Crowley opening the Cage's doors, so Meg can push him the oven, just like the evil witch in that fairy tale which used to terrorize Sammy, Hansel and Gretel. Wow. A few days ago he wouldn't have admitted so easily that he can't care less about Adam. Before when he heard Adam's name, he used to feel acid jealousy bubbling in his stomach, and he didn't want anyone to call him his brother, he had only one.

He remembers when they first met Adam, how angry he was, in their motel room's kitchen, but he couldn't say a word, it was like his throat was too tight or to many thoughts were fighting to get out. He could just drink. Drink and drink. And Sam had crouched right beside him, kissed him in the neck and took his glass away saying "I'm here, I'm right here with you. I love you and only you okay Dean?". He felt tears coming to his eyes and falling on the table. How a dead man could still hurt him so much? Sam whispered "He didn't care about that kid more than he cared about us love.". Dean rubbed his eyes and muttered "I just... why...", not knowing precisely what to say, and Sam knew, as always. He said "nobody heals from childhood, baby, we can just live with it. I love you, I've always loved you, focus on that, remember that". Sam kissed him, mumbling in his mouth"try to forget the old man", and then added "the kid's not responsible". Dean agreed, and let Sam make him feel better. But he never managed to be fair to Adam. In a way Sam was right, you can't heal from your childhood.

Dean feels Sam's lips on his own as if he were really here with him, and it tears him inside so much he wants to kill something just to feel a little less worse, if that even exists.

Anyway Crowley has some of his DNA running in his veins so he could believe in this family man act. he could. Or he could ask him to attack Heaven with his team before he'd free Adam. The King looks like he's expecting something he doesn't talk about, and Dean doesn't like that. It makes him feel like something's gonna happen to him when, let's be honest, what could possibly be worst that this?

But right now, what frightens him is that if he has to attack Heaven, Cas will be forced to protect his people against him.

Maybe even protect himself.

* * *

Sam is comfortably lying in his bed, eyes closed with his arm over his eyes. He smiles at the feeling of kisses on his inner thighs, and he hears a chuckle

"Why are you hiding babe?"

He opens his eyes, and sees Dean across the bed, smiling at him, his right hand lying flat on his stomach, making little circles around his belly button. Sam shivers and says

"Because if I look at you I won't last long"

Dean laughs openly and replies, while kissing him through his boxers

"I know."

Sam groans, and bites his wrist, old reflex. He doesn't know why Dean's here, he doesn't know if they're home alone or not, he doesn't know if he's dreaming or not, but he frankly doesn't care. He needed that, he so desperately needed that.

He shuts his eyes tight and tries to control his hips moving on their own, and he represses a laugh when he hears Dean saying

"Steady there cowboy!"

When he finally comes, he opens his eyes and sees Dean taking it all, with a smile, his black eyes, deep as a sea of ink, locked in Sam's.

His black eyes. Yes of course. Sam isn't even surprised.

Dean kisses him and it's terribly dirty in a very exciting way. He whispers in his ear "Do you want it baby? Do you want it in your mouth?" and Sam frantically nods, yes, yes he wants it, he needs it, right here, right now, and he feels he's being hard again.

His brother kisses him again and says "You promise you won't bite this time?", and Sam begs him. Yes he promises, everything you want love, but please please please...

Dean grabs Ruby's knife on the nightstand and slices his wrist. Sam desperately suck on the wound like a starved newborn, moaning, forgetting his promise. He bites in Dean's soft flesh and feels his ruby red blood filling his mouth, his throat and his whole self. He could come just from that, from the taste of iron on his tongue, and Dean laughs and laughs at his greed. When he takes away his wrist it feels like a sacrilege.

Sam's face is covered in Dean's blood, and he sees in Dean's eyes he likes what he's seeing.

"You're mine" he says, with a little smirk and Sam looks at him like he's the only God he will ever worship, straddling him and begging

"I'm yours, make me yours, take me, take my soul, take everything you want"

Sam wakes up shocked and covered in cold sweat. His room is empty and everything is silent. He doesn't think about anything else than his dream. He's afraid. Because this wasn't a nightmare. Definitely not. If Dean appeared in his room right now, it could happen. And Sam would sell his soul, mind and body to Demon Dean a thousand times. He would drink his blood as if it were the nectar of the Gods. He would sit beside him on the throne of Hell if Dean asked him. They would reign on the underworld.

The most frightening thing is Sam likes the idea.

Without thinking, he walked like a zombie to the storage room, to the devil's trap, and he begins to pick ingredients to summon a demon. He needs to talk to him. It's been too long, it's been two weeks and he can't stand it anymore. Maybe Dean will ask him to follow him into the dark, and he will walk with him. He will go down that Pit.

"Sam?"

He hears Saskia's sleepy voice, and he turns around, only to see her standing in the threshold, wearing ridiculous PJs with a mustache decor. When she sees what he's doing, she comes inside the circle and takes his hand, whispering "No, no, no".

He looks at her and sees she has perfectly understood what he was trying to do. He lets go of her hand and says, harshly

"I need to talk to him."

She smiles and shakes her head

"I know you're worried Sam, but you're not strong enough for that yet. Your powers have just awaken, you're still weak."

His powers. Yes. He had completely forgotten about this. They were forming a circle and he... he lost consciousness.

"How long was I out?"

Saskia takes back his hand

"Two weeks."

He tries not to shout

"Two weeks?! Two weeks! What the Hell..."

" Your power is way stronger than we had anticipated Sam." she says, adding, "and it's good news, Sam... I think I can use it to trap your brother, Rudi and I spent these last days designing the trap, it's almost done. And Kevin has translated a second tablet"

Sam sighes

"What about Cas?"

Saskia looks embarrassed

"Hum... he was angry at us for... you know. But Rudi and I managed to... more or less... talk him through it. Plus... there were things in this new tablet which kinda changed his view on witches."

Sam opens his eyes wide

"What about it?"

"We'll talk about that tomorrow okay? I can't wake Kevin up in the middle of the night can I?"

Sam shakes his head, and Saskia walks to the door, waiting for Sam to follow. He doesn't, and she smiles at him again, gently.

"I need to know he's okay" he says, and he wishes his voice didn't tremble.

"I understand" she replies, "I'd be worried too if I were you"

She leaves the room, and wait for him in the hallway. He certainly needs some time alone, but she can't leave him in this room without keeping an eye on him. He's still fragile.

After a few minutes, she hears him sob and cry Dean's name.

Let's hope the trap will work.


	10. Unicorn

"Gadriel we have to tell him"

Gadriel is in Hannah's, well Castiel's office, and they've been arguing for hours.

"Do we really need to bother Castiel with that?" he insists, "He is trying to find God, does he really have to be bothered by missing reapers?"

Hannah looks at him and tries to repress her anger. She's tired. Nothing is working like it should. When Castiel destroyed the Angel Tablet, the Gates of Heaven were open again, and she thought all the souls trapped in the Veil would be soon gathered and brought to Heaven by the Reapers. But first, a lot of Reapers have apparently disappeared, and second, an even bigger lot of souls is simply missing. Not trapped. Missing. And the Reapers have no explanation for that, they're actually more worried by the disappearance of Death.

Death is nowhere to be found and without him, the Reapers have no leader, and therefore no goal.

"Souls are missing Gadriel, and a lot of them. This isn't a good sign. And even if our brothers and sisters are coming home, we are not getting any stronger. Castiel has to know."

She sighs

"I don't know how long I can hold everyone together. Especially with those rumors... "

Gadriel asks

"What rumors?"

"About Dean Winchester being the new Cain? Creating new Knights of Hell?"

Gadriel shrugs

"How do they..."

"I'm not the only one to have ears in Hell Gadriel. And I've been told Crowley is planning to attack Heaven." replies Hannah, angrily, "I'm doing my best to avoid a new Civil War here."

She sits down behind her desk

"Castiel wants to protect the Winchesters, again. But he needs to understand his friends are not exactly popular in Heaven."

Gadriel frowns

"Those humans never asked to be caught in our problems Hannah. Michael and Lucifer are responsible, for wanting to bring their war on Earth, for forgetting humans have free will and can refuse to be used as puppets"

He doesn't know where this sudden love for humankind comes, but he feels the injustice of the situation extremely shocking. Hannah smiles sadly,

"I know Gadriel. And I agree with you, I do. But you know how the factions are. If Dean Winchester and his knights attack us, Castiel will have to lead us against them. You will have too as well. And if you show mercy..."

Gadriel sits, understanding.

"Some will see that as weakness and will refuse to listen to us any longer."

Hannah nods

"This balance we have, it's fragile. I told everyone Castiel was trying to find God, and it gave people hope. But I don't have anything else to say. I can't disclose the content of the second tablet, can I?"

Gadriel shakes his head

"No, that wouldn't be wise. I still have difficulties to process the information. Have you found anything in the Intelligence Division?"

Hannah gets up and sits on her desk, looking desperate

"Apparently Naomi's division was keeping records of every time they altered our memories. I saw that room Gadriel it's... huge. It's going to be very long to process all the data, I asked two friends to begin investigating it, Eli and Anael, they're trustworthy."

Gadriel rises and pats Hannah's shoulder

"God certainly had a good reason to do that."

Hannah holds his hand and replies.

"What could be a good reason to wipe all our memories and replace them with lies Gadriel?"

He doesn't know what to answer.

* * *

It's been maybe fifteen minutes that Saskia is sit in the hallway, waiting for Sam to get out of the storage room, and she begins to worry. Sam is still crying, and it's really not what she had anticipated. When she regained her powers, she felt genuinely happy for the first time in... actually for the first time ever. She honestly thought it would be the same for Sam. Since she first saw him, back in her shop, and especially since she knows they're both the same, both Azazel's children, both rejected by their families, she feels connected to him. She's never had a brother, or a real close friend. She's not good at comforting people or finding the right words. But she could try to do something, even something awkward, instead of staying in that hallway, her knees tucked under her chin like a four years old.

She gets up and walks back inside the room. Sam is sit in the middle of the devil's trap, and his eyes are red, swollen. He's not crying anymore, just... maybe weeping. He looks at Saskia through the tears, she's walking towards him, and then sits right in front of him, her legs crossed. She bites her lip and finally says

"What can I do? Tell me what I can do to help you Sam..."

Sam stares at her and whispers

"I can't stop it..."

He looks so helpless. When he was asleep, Saskia asked Kevin how close the brothers were, and she remembers the Prophet seemed a little embarrassed. He answered they were "extremely close", that they had basically grown up in their car together, with no one else to rely on. He told her Sam mentioned their father a few times, a cold man, wary of him and violent to Dean.  
Somehow, Sam and Dean make her think of Logan, and she knows how unhealthy it is. Power or not, she can't escape her old Stockholm Syndrom, and she can't escape her guilt, and the vision of his face melting, the smell of burning flesh. And her laugh. Filling the room.

"I don't know what's happening to me... It won't... stop..."

Saskia sighes

"You miss him..."

Sam nods, and he begins to cry again, smothered by sobs, unable to move. Saskia closes her eyes for a moment, calling herself an idiot for not being able to find a way to comfort Sam. She comes closer and hugs him, a little awkwardly. She's not at ease with physical contact, but Sam needs help and she just can't leave him on the floor like this. She does her best to hold the hunter's large body in her tiny arms, and Sam hold her back, trying to calm down. Both their hearts touch and suddenly, Sam stops moving, holding her closer.

"Sam?" asks Saskia, unable to get herself out of Sam's embrace.

Sam can't answer. He's somewhere else.

There's a house in flames in front of him, and he thinks it looks pretty. A red haired woman is standing beside him, and she's crying.

Then he's in front of a chimney, and a fire is burning. He's proud, thinking it's his fire, and it's beautiful.

Hotel lobby, his eyes are burning. His mother shouts "No!".

Old factory, he makes a ghost burn and a man with a shot gun calls him "little devil".

Hunting hurts. Hunting gives fever and nosebleeds. But no one cares, no one cares he's sick and he cries himself to sleep in the tiny bed at the back of the RV.

His back burns. This tattoo is taking forever to be made, and every time the needle touches his skin it hurts like a bee sting.

His mother cries and drinks and drinks and cries. A young man laughs. Calls her a useless bitch.

The man has long black hair and angry black eyes. Sam thinks he's very handsome even if Black Hair doesn't like him. Today Black Hair has a black eye for talking back to his dad.

He his crying and screaming, knelt on the ground. His mother is dead, she burnt in an old log cabin.

Black hair chains him in the RV and calls him "demon". The others laugh. His wrists are bruised.

He wakes up in the middle of the night and Black hair is close to his bed saying he's sorry. Black hair's drunk, he smokes a cigarette, and when he's finished, he crushes it on Sam's wrist.

Insults, beatings, chains. Fevers, nosebleeds. He wants to die. Why can't he sleep and never wake up?

Black hair has raped him yesterday. He will do it again, he's sure.

BURN! Everybody is on fire and it seems so, so, so beautiful. They can all melt, they can all disappear.

He trades his body for a lift to the next town. It feels soul crushing and disgusting, but that's what he deserves. He's a monster.

He sees the ocean for the first time. He wants to drown.

An old lady has taken him in. She cooks nice things and she doesn't ask questions.

Funeral. Why does everybody die?

He has a fiancé and he's lucky. He's lucky right?

Two men enter his shop, posing as FBI agents. One is... himself.

"Aaaauuughhh..." Sam has just let her go, and he's breathing heavily, staring at her with his eyes wide open, eyes which have turned yellow. Saskia rubs her arms. This embrace lasted for maybe twenty seconds but Sam is so strong he almost crushed her.

"What's wrong?" she says, "Sam talk to me? What's just happened?"

Sam mutters

"I saw... I saw... your life... I think"

Oh shit. How is that even possible?

Sam is completely out of breath, it's like he's been hit by a truck of emotions. And so much pain... It's a stupid thing to say but it doesn't... show at all. She's so nice and outgoing, he would have never... In a way she's like Dean.

"Sam I'm so, so sorry, I have no idea how it happened." says Saskia, really embarrassed, "I'm gonna get some help", she adds, getting up. But Sam catches her wrist to stop her from going.

"I don't judge you" he says, and Saskia feels tears coming to her eyes. She quickly nods and runs to get Rudi. Five minutes later, she's back in the room and Sam has turned back to his original eye color. He also breathes normally.

Rudi kneels in front of him and stares at his heart.

"Saskia dear, find me a peridot please"

Sam frowns and Rudi explains

"This" he points at his heart, "is open too wide, the stone will help you keeping it normal."

Sam nods. At this point he would give just anything to have some peace of mind. He notices Rudi doesn't touch him, and also that he has a little satisfied smile. Why on Earth is he smiling?

Saskia comes back with a green stone, and Rudi gives him to Sam, telling him to hold it on his heart. After a few seconds, he feels better, his emotions don't smother him anymore, and he can even think of Dean without feeling like screaming.

"Thank you" he says, relieved.

Rudi gets up and says

"You're welcome son." he smiles and turns to Saskia, "I think he's an empath"

"What?" shouts Sam

"You've always been a warlock dear. This is your real power, empathy."

Sam gets up, confused

"Empathy?"

Saskia comes closer

"Yeah... You feel and share other persons' emotions. When we touched you... connected with me and saw my memories. That makes sense..."

Rudi pats his shoulder and Sam begins to laugh. He turns to the older man and says

"It makes you that happy?"

Rudi smiles and replies

"No, I was laughing internally at the irony of the situation. You were both supposed to be evil, and here you are, with power that are the epitome of light magic, empathy and healing."

He continues

"That's why you were chosen by the demon Sam, because of your magic. Your ancestors were hunters and Men of Letters, so if we found you have a few witches in your genealogical tree, that wouldn't be a surprise."

Sam smiles and then adds, a little nostalgic

"When Dean's gonna know that, count on him to call me Hermione for the rest of my life"

Rudi laughs and says

"Then, let me be your Dumbledore. Saskia will be an young version of Mrs Mc Gonagall."

Saskia burst out laughing

"You said you didn't read those books! That they were for children!"

"I lied." replies her father before leaving the room, laughing.

"I can't believe it" says Sam, "It's just..."

"Empathy is a very strong power Sam... And rare."

She smiles. He has no idea how powerful he's going to become.

"How strong? I just feel... weak right now. I've just found out that apparently, being an emotional mess is a superpower..."

No idea. In a few weeks he will be able to smite anything that crosses his path.

" Because it's not trained. But a good empath is also a telepath and a psychic. He can make other people feel things, see things, think things... That's certainly why your power was so strong, why you could kill demon so easily. By just imagining them dead."

Sam is confused

"A power which is also a weakness is the strongest power possible. I know it's hard to understand, but it's how magic works, how... light magic works."

Saskia explains to Sam that light magic is based on the idea of balance. Light powers always start as weaknesses, for example, and empath suffers from the sadness of others, and a healer is always tired because he constantly uses his own energy to instinctively heal other people. Turning this weakness into a strength requires a lot of training, a lot of meditation, just to be able to live normally. But when the warlock is finally able to control his ability enough to master its light side, he can work at learning its dark side.

"Healing has a dark side?" asks Sam.

"Of course, the dark side of healing is taking away any living thing's life energy, and the dark side of empathy is mind control"

Sam frowns

"Yeah but... What about the price?"

Saskia smiles

"You don't understand? You've already paid the price. It's your suffering, it's... all these emotions smothering you since you were a child. Light magic is about paying the price first and acquiring the power later, when dark magic is power first, price later. That's why people prefer dark magic, because it seems easier."

Sam realizes

"So God uses... dark magic? How's that any good?"

The witch sighs

"It's not. But with what Kev found out, I'm not even surprised."

* * *

"You need to relax Clarence, it's just me."

Castiel has been waiting for Meg on an isolated bench for... he doesn't even know how long. He knows he shouldn't see her again after what happened last time, but he needs to know how's Dean, what Crowley's planning and he kind of want to see Meg too, even if he won't admit it.

"I was more careful this time"

She says, sitting next to him. She's possessing a man's body this time, and it really feels strange to Castiel who's always seen her as a woman. The man is plain, maybe thirty to thirty-five, wearing a baseball cap and a worn out red t-shirt. He could be just anyone, and that's probably why Meg chose him.

"I don't have a lot of time though. So hum, the team is almost complete."

Castiel jumps

"What?"

"Dean has chosen the five other knights, he's will turn them tonight."

Castiel is surprised at how quick Dean was to reform the Knights of Hell. He knew thanks to Hannah that it was Crowley's goal but still, Hell is going too fast when they're stuck here with not enough information.

"So Crowley is planning to attack Heaven?" he asks

"Yes. But Clarence...", Meg smiles a little, and he can recognize her through the man's features, "We won't... Dean won't let it happen. He has a plan to get rid of Crowley before he has to attack you."

Castiel nods, knowing that Meg won't be able to tell him any more details. He hopes Dean knows what he's doing. He'd really like to trust Meg when she says he's still the same. But what Hannah's heard really sounds different. To Hannah's informants, Dean is bloodthirsty and cruel. A master torturer. Crowley's strongest Hellhound. He massacred a nest of vampires for not bowing to the new king and rumor has it he dismembered them and exposed their torn up bodies in the most disgusting way. He didn't mention it to anyone in the bunker, but he definitely agrees with the witch when she says Dean has to be captured the soonest possible.

"What are your plans?" she asks

Castiel sighs.

"I can't share that with you yet, but thanks for the head's up"

He rises and Meg catches his trench coat.

"You know, when everything is over, we really should take that vacation we talked about"

Castiel smiles at her and disappears. Meg whispers

"Goodbye, unicorn".


	11. Trust

"Well isn't that a fine team."

Meg has to bite the inside of her mouth to stop herself from screaming. She's knelt in front of Crowley, with the five other Knights Dean has dubbed. Dean is knelt too and she can feel from where she is how pissed he can be.

Choosing five other nights was kinda complicated since apart from Meg whom he just strongly dislikes, Dean hates everyone in Hell. So, to cure his boredom and his growing need of bloodshed, he began to track down and kill all the demons who laid a finger on him while he was in Hell. And there were many. He remembered them with a frightening accuracy, and here they were still working like nothing had ever happened, like they were just respecting Alastair's orders all right? So what could possibly go wrong for them?

Everything, said Dean, with his now famous evil grin.

He took a lot of pleasure dismembering them, and every time one was down, he felt a little stronger. It was like heroin. He had tried that once, just once, when Sammy was in Stanford. And he had always remembered to never approach a needle again, because there were a lot of chances he would end up a back alley junkie. He had felt so... relaxed. So good. And killing was just the same, except killing also made him stronger. That's when he heard Hell's prisoners cheering when heads were flying that he decided who he would choose. He opened all the doors and said

"Who would serve me? Who would fight for me?"

And they all screamed and danced in their torturers' blood and torn up bodies, saying they would go anywhere, and do anything for him, for their savior. He had never felt so recognized, so valued. They were throwing themselves at his feet, begging him to choose them. Promising to be the most loyal, the most cruel, the most obedient. He saw a group not sharing the common hysteria, and he asked them why they were not celebrating. A dark haired man said, spitting blood on the ground,

"I ain't a sheep. I don't serve no one. I won't jump from a fucking cliff because you asked me to."

And the others nodded. They looked wary, defiant, seemed to be the kind to insult their torturer until there was nothing left of them. They were exactly what he needed, and how many he needed.

"If I offer you power? Enough power to get back at your enemies?"

He said, getting closer to Dark Hair. The other man combed his bangs back with his bloody hands and replied

"Well then yes...", he had a little smirk, "Sir.". And he added "The name's Logan".

* * *

" God erased your memories?"

Sam is shocked at Kevin's revelation and Castiel, Gadriel and Hannah look completely depressed. The hunter is sit in the library with a steaming cup of coffee, and is surrounded by the whole Scooby Gang as Kev has just named them, making Saskia laugh and say "I demand to be called Buffy". After his consuming experience of the night, Sam spent the remaining hours until morning talking with Saskia about her past, and about magic and the possible developments of his ability.

"So you really don't judge me?" she said, looking a little emotional.

"I was literally in your shoes Saskia." he answered, trying to smile a little.

Saskia sighed and replied she was sorry for putting him through this, adding she knew her life story was really hard to hear. "I want you to know I didn't want to lie to you, or to hide you who I really was. I wanted to spare you", she explained, twisting her hands. Sam reassured her and told her he understood. After all, he couldn't really blame her. He had himself done his share of mistakes, sometimes terrible mistakes, and if he now knew absolutely everything about her, she, on the other hand didn't know much about him. About his relationship with Dean, for a start. He was the first to always tell Dean they should be themselves out in the open, but there he was, completely unable to disclose this to someone he had just broken into.

She told him Dean didn't judge her either when she told him everything, that night, in her house, when she had in fact almost burnt him alive after Dean threatened to shoot her. "Your friend Garth had just called to tell him who I was, what I had done...", she explained, saying she managed to direct her fire in her kitchen's sink, before grabbing Dean's gun. "He wanted to check on you, so we went to see how you were doing, and then, I told him everything". She was tired then, tired of trying to conceal who she was, tired of lying to everyone, and she desperately needed to tell her story to someone, even if it was just to see fear and disgust in their eyes. "Once I was done I gave your brother his gun back, and I told him to do what he wanted. I honestly thought he would shoot. He didn't.". More, he even said he understood. That some humans also deserved to die. That's when he talked to her about his past as a hunter and Sam's abilities. "When he called Azazel 'Yellow Eyes' I just... wanted to throw up. Back then I used to wear contact lenses to hide my eyes. I knew there was something deeply abnormal about them, but you know what? I had never done any research about yellow-eyed demons. I guess I was too afraid to find something.". After that, Dean gave her Garth's phone number so she could find the man who tipped him about her, Frank Pivnik. "He used to be Rick's - the leader of my group - sidekick. He was in love with my mother, and he had kept some stuff, notably a notebook". In this notebook were written three Rainer Maria Rilke's poems, one being a spell to contact Rudi. "He showed at my hotel room's doorstep almost in tears, and i held him at gunpoint", she said, while lighting a cigarette. She told him everything and accepted to go with him after a little stay in North Kingston, the time for her to rent her house and to ask her ex mother in law to take care of her shop. "Nicole is a shark. She doesn't buy haunted stuff like I did, and she makes way more money than I ever did.", she adds laughing. After that she came to Rudi's weekend house, where he took her tattoo off, and later trained her.

"Since we're fully disclosing everything Sam... There are two things I need to tell you. First, I... slept with your brother."

Sam swallowed with difficulty, he definitely knew there was a reason for this morning awkwardness when they left Saskia's house.

"It didn't mean anything really. We were I suppose too... angry, tensed or whatever and it just... happened." she adds. "I didn't came here hoping to uh... rekindle anything. I really came here out of gratitude."

Sam nodded. They've never been faithful when it comes to having sex with women along the road. But it still hurt a little.

"Second thing, when my tattoo was removed, I accidentally killed someone. He... beat his wife, he was... yelling at her... in front of me and uh... I came back to my car, I really, really wanted to leave as fast as possible. And then he came to my window and called me a cunt. I blacked out and when I woke up his car had exploded."

Saskia looked really ashamed, and Sam asked

"Are you still dangerous?"

She shook her head

"No. I remained a whole year in Rudi's cabin without seeing anyone else than him and his few warlock friends, until I was in complete control."

Sam smiled and said, "Then it's fine. Thank you for... being honest with me. We're not all... able... to do that".

He put the boiler on and kept talking, half to himself.

"I wish Dean and I had more... I don't know relied? On people... Dean used to say... that everyone close to him died. And that's true, we lost a lot of friends, close friends."

He grabbed a tea bag and watched the hot water in his cup slowly turn brown.

"I've always depended on him for..." he smiled, "everything. He saved me countless times. For once I'd like to be able to save him... I'd like to be able to make a difference."

Saskia whispered

"You can."

Sam turned to her and drank some tea.

"What's in it for you Saskia? In helping us... gratitude left aside... That's what I didn't see... What I'd like to know"

The witch got up and began to pour cold water in a cup.

"When I met you two I realized I wanted to be around people who would accept me... whole", she blinked and looked at Sam with her amber eyes, "with these eyes". Then she held her cup and the water started boiling, "with my fire". She dipped a finger in the boiling water until it became burnt and blistered and then took it out. Sam saw the skin heal itself and turn back to white. "And with my healing".

"I can't ask you to be my friend Sam, but the simple fact you can witness that without freaking out... means a lot to me."

She took his hand

"Trust your empathy. Trust what you feel."

Sam held her hand and felt a wave of different feelings, of different thoughts, memories, all collided in one powerful stream. What every single person carries everyday without even thinking about it. Billions of drops and he could detail them all. After a few seconds he understood what was in this for her, a family. She just wanted a family.

He smiled.

"I trust you. I understand."

Saskia smiled back

"Good." she said, slowly sipping her tea. "Your power is going to be... really impressive Sam. Believe me. You're not just a vessel. You're not a tool."

"How long is it gonna take for me to control it? I mean I don't have two years."

Saskia laughed

"You won't need two years. You're better than a few hours ago Sam, it means you've already started controlling your empathy. As for demon smiting I'm sure Rudi can train you in a very short time. In the meantime, you can wear the peridot as a necklace, or a bracelet. And I can make you a tattoo similar to mine to protect you."

Sam frowned

"What are the spells you used?"

"A lot. The most important are anti possession and anti location. I can't be possessed by angels or demons, and can't be located by anyone. This one could really come in handy for you."

"Why?" said Sam

"Well... If the demons have a way to find you, I guess the King of Hell could ask your brother to kill you. You're protected here, not outside. And you need to go out to train."

Sam accepted, and they waited until the morning to organize a meeting with Kevin, Linda and the angels, so they could plan their next move.

Looking at the angels faces, it seems like their world is crumbling and maybe it is. Kevin is twisting his hands, saying he had read this Tablet first and then decided to translate the one about the Grail after, to spare them for a few days. But in the end he had no choice but disclosing the truth.

Castiel shakes his head and says he's not surprised. He explains to the gang he has been having suspicions since he met Naomi and learnt her division altered his memory at least once.

"I asked Hannah about her first memory. We have exactly the same one. Standing on a shore and almost stepping on a fish."

Hannah nods, while biting her lower lip. She adds

"The tablet says that God did this to save us from a new apocalypse. It means it has already happened once. It means... I don't know, this is too much..."

Sam coughed

"So if we sum this up, God says in this tablet that basically... he sacrificed his Grace to erase the angels memories? That's it Kev?"

Kevin looks embarrassed.

"From what I gathered... There is a cataclysm described in the text hum... "a wave that crushed the Elohim cities", and then a battle between "those who had remained faithful to Heaven, and those who had fled on Earth to engender abominations"

Gadriel whispered

"Nephilims..."

Kevin looks up

"I guess so. So there was this 'wave', I guess it was the Flood, and then wars. Cities burnt to the ground."

Hannah completes

"Sodom and Gomorrah..."

"Yeah" replies the Prophet. "After that, God imprisoned 'The Snake', I suppose Lucifer, in his Cage, and locked his surviving followers in Heaven's Cells."

Gadriel coughs

"I don't think I was a follower of Lucifer... Though I don't... know..."

Kevin continues

"That's when it says that seeing the wrath the wars had brought on Earth, God dived in his 'cauldron', purging the angel's memories of their past atrocities"

Sam frowns

"What I don't get is... he failed. The Apocalypse almost started... again, apparently."

Rudi intervenes

"There are two remaining tablets Sam. Maybe they will tell us the reason of all this. I suppose the answer lies in the creation of the angels."

Castiel stares at the warlock

"Do you know anything?"

"Not more than what I told you before my friend. To me, and to all the witches and warlocks I know, your God didn't created the universe, or this planet, or humans. Your God is just a god. An ancient one, hiding under many names and many forms, but just a god. And a fellow warlock. Every single spell described in this 'word of God' are sacrifice spells, blood magic... dark magic, to make it simple. To me your God is a being who played too much with the laws of nature and who found himself unable to repair his mistakes."

Castiel tries to repress a "blasphemy" that really wants to get out of his mouth. Two weeks ago, when Sam passed out after Rudi and Saskia had taken off the seal on his abilities, they had a very heated argument about magic, at the end of which Rudi really calmly told him than he had always considered "his God" was no more than a warlock. A very good one, a very powerful one, certainly not from this dimension they were living in, but not an all powerful being who had created the universe.

"All proper witches and warlocks know what the Universal Energy, what Life, or Mother Nature is. And it is definitely not your God. Life is everywhere, and nowhere. It has no name, no sex, no gender. It has no identity and all the identities. You can't talk to it, you can just feel it, or be part of it. Your God angel... is no God of mine."

Castiel was of course shocked that someone could deny the existence of his creator, and they abandon trying to get along. More, Castiel was too busy trying to boost Heaven's defenses against Crowley, trying to get every single angel to go back to Heaven, hoping it would restore its energy. But when Kevin finally disclosed the content of the second tablet, Castiel had no choice but apologizing to Rudi saying that he was right. God was apparently some kind of warlock. And a liar. Surprisingly, the warlock wasn't at all resentful, and accepted wholeheartedly the angel's apology, and began to call him his friend.

That's how, at Sam's greatest surprise, Cas seemed pretty happy to see him awake and healthy, and absolutely not wary of him or angry at his decision to unleash his powers.

Rudi continues

"Sam, while you were recovering, Saskia and I completed a trap designed for your brother. It still lacks a few things, I will explain to you later, but I'm really hopeful. Kevin and I also found some time to study the Arthurian Legend to see if we could find something to help us figure out what the first tablet was about."

Sam's expecting

"And?"

Kevin grins.

"We found something. You remember the thing about a secret castle hidden behind a mirror?"

Sam frowns

"Yeah..."

"Well there is a story about the fairy Vivian, the Lady of the Lake, who used to live in a..." Kevin smiles, "crystal castle at the bottom of a lake"

Saskia mumbles

"Of course..."

Kevin continues

"Vivian was also the ruler of Avalon, the mystic island of the fairies. She raised Lancelot in her castle after his father's death, and gave Excalibur to King Arthur. And she was Merlin's apprentice."

Sam nods

"The books say that she locked Merlin in her castle for eternity, because she was in love with him and he wouldn't reciprocate."

Linda rolls her eyes

"That sounds stupid."

"Mom..." says Kevin, amused, "Though she's not wrong. Vivian was really powerful. She was actually the one to start the quest for the Grail, and to advise Arthur after she locked Merlin away. She's also the one who took the King to Avalon after he was fatally injured during the battle of Camlann. I don't think she locked him for that reason. Anyway, she's the one we need to talk to. She knows how to find the Grail. Maybe the whole Arthurian cycle is a metaphor but... Vivian, or whatever her real name, was looking for God."

Castiel sighs

"That doesn't ring any kind of proverbial bell."

Sam gets up and starts walking around the Library, thinking.

"That lake... could it be a... portal?"

"Could be, I guess" says Saskia.

"But it's in France apparently" completes Kevin.

Sam bites his index's finger nail

"Charlie..." he whispers, before laughing openly, "of course! Charlie!"

Everybody looks at him like he's lost his mind

"I know how we can go to fairy land, I think we can even have a guide!"

* * *

"My King, I present you the six Knights I've chosen: Meg, rise"

Meg gets up and tries to keep a straight face.

"Logan, rise"

The dark haired man gets up and Crowley instantly loathes him. He looks like an evil version of Moose, somehow. Black hair, black eyes, something aggressive and deeply contemptuous in his gaze. He's a little shorter and skinnier than Dean's darling brother, but he looks way more dangerous. The kind of man you don't want to overlook in a bar fight.

"Katrina, rise"

A tall and thin Black woman rises, and the King can't not notice her striking beauty. She wears her hair in long and thin braids that go all the way till her lower back, and she stares at him with two unsettling light green eyes, her arms crossed in defiance. Crowley has seen her somewhere, he's sure, but he can't quite recall where.

"Kimaris, rise"

Also known as Cimeyes, she used to command legions of demons until she displeased Alastair and was sent to his torture chamber. Oh. Of course. That's where he went for picking his new playmates. She looks like a Persian print, with her long and curly hair, henna red. She reminds him of Abaddon and he really doesn't like the way she looks at him.

"Andras, rise"

Also a disgraced demon, a master in manipulation and discord. He was locked in the... wait... maybe XVIII century? Last time Crowley's heard of him he was making a mess of the post Revolution France, dancing around the blossoming guillotines. He didn't find the time to curl his blond hair again but that's gonna come soon

"Agares, rise"

Andras's partner in crime of course. Who used to party with the infamous Marquis de Sade. He stares at Crowley with a lot of irony in his grey eyes, cold as steal. Both him and Andras were known for being traitors, shallow and cruel bastards.

Crowley looks at the whole team and wonders if their common hate for Alastair and his minions will be enough to keep the group together. Dean looks pretty satisfied though, and he awaits for Crowley's approval.

"Good job mate" he says, a little uneasy, "You deserved a little vacation now."

Dean frowns and groans

"I just want Adam out.", before coughing and adding, "Thank you, my King, it won't be necessary"

Crowley rolls his eyes. Dean is really far, far, far from being funny these last days.

"Well, a promise is a promise" he says, getting up from his chair, "I'll get him out"

Dean looks at him with his demon eyes and says

"May I accompany you?"

Crowley nods and gets out of his office, accompanied by Dean and Meg, while the others are waiting in the hallway. He knew Dean would soon turn into the Blade, but he didn't expect this to happen so soon. It's like he's almost completely gone.

Meg smiles discretely at Dean, and he smiles back to her.

Tonight's the night.


	12. True Evil

Dean was walking with Meg in never ending hallways, trying not to show his excitement. This was it, this was the moment when he would finally get rid of Crowley. The bastard was whistling, and Dean could visualize himself cutting his head off just for that. Just for that whistle. Alastair used to do that. Whistling old tunes while butchering his victims.

Crowley wasn't completely oblivious of Dean's plans. Poor Dean. He had lost in sense of humor, gained a lot of strength, but not a lot of intelligence. He had always been a strike now think later kind of bloke, when Crowley was more like a chess player. So he could completely feel their aggressiveness fill the surrounding space, and he also could guess what they were planning to do. Probably push him in the Pit. Children...

Well, he didn't blame them though. He perfectly knew what it was to want to kill your superior. After all, he didn't become King out of his outstanding loyalty and professional conscience. If he had been in Dean's shoes, he would have done everything to steal Hell's crown. Everything. That's how you raise from the gutter, definitely not by waiting for a helping hand.

Meg is certainly thinking about her revenge, and Dean is certainly thinking about Moose. About being reunited with his darling brother in their underground love nest. He can't care less about that Adam boy. He's been in the Cage for centuries now, and there's certainly nothing left of him. There had been dozens of occasions when they could have lift this poor third wheel out of Hell, and it was never a priority neither for Dean or for Moose. So yeah. Pretty obvious plan.

What Dean didn't know was that a faction of angels were preparing an attack on Hell to free Michael from the Cage, and Crowley could have bet Trench Coat didn't know that either. He had been so busy trying to be good and democratic that he forgot that his brothers and sisters were more mercenaries than aspiring citizens. Mercenaries who need a Leader, with a capital L. So that faction, the Faithful, as they modestly called themselves, were right now gathering on the warpath even more since a very convenient informant told them there was a loophole they could exploit to get inside the Pit. Well it's wrong of course, but hey, war begins with information right? He'll just have to look dreadfully surprised when demon n°542 comes to "inform" him the attack is imminent.

Right now, Crowley has trouble keeping his poker face. If Dean's Blade swallows an angel's Grace, or several if he's lucky, that will make hopefully forget about Moose, and so forget about pushing him in Luci's Cage.

Poor thing. When is he going to admit that he definitely isn't the one running this show?

The rest of Dean's Round Table is waiting for him to come back from the Pit in a room that looks like a hotel lobby from the 1950's. Logan is comfortably sit in an large leather armchair, and he's enjoying a cool glass of bourbon. That's a nice change after decades spent being burnt to ashes everyday. Demons have a wicked sense of humor. Burning him, taking her face. He won't pronounce her name, he won't even think about it, about her yellow eyes and the smirk on her face when she said "You, you burn". And her laugh when he could smell his own flesh grilling. He drinks a little more, and before he can swallow there's that blond boy, Andras, sitting on his chair's armrest.

He looks eighteen, or nineteen, and has long light blond hair brushing his shoulders. His eyes are blue, but almost lavender and he has a very pale, porcelain skin. He could be the perfect cliché angel, but having him so close feels highly uncomfortable. He begins to speak, with a very soft voice

"My, my, my... aren't you adorable."

Logan raises an eyebrow and mutters

"Fuck off fagot."

Andras smiles but his eyes are cold. He replies, with the same even tone

"That mouth would look cuter with my cock in it"

And before Logan can say anything, he gets up, stretches his arms and says "Lord I'm bored..."

The hunter rises quickly, jumping like a panther and he grabs the blond boy's collar groaning

"Talk to me like that again and I'll cut your fucking dick and shove it in your mouth, got it?"

Andras stares at him for a second, completely calm and answers

"There's no need for that darling, I'm very flexible", he licks his lips and repeats, "very".

Logan grabs the crystal bourbon bottle and is ready to smash it on Andras's face when his wrist gets caught by Agares, who whispers

"Hush hush dear boy. He's just playing with you."

Agares takes the bottle and puts it down, and Logan lets go of Andras who shrugs his shoulders and says

"Too bad"

Logan snaps

"Too bad what?"

Andras smiles

"That was getting interesting"

That man is a maniac, he thinks. And they're on the same team.

"Why are you here?" asks Agares. He looks more normal than the other. Older, but that's maybe just an appearance. With chestnut hair, long as well, and cold grey eyes.

Logan glares at him and mutters

"Why are **you** here?"

Agares makes a little half smile and sits in Logan's chair, quickly joined by Andras who sits back on the armrest.

"When I was human" he begins, gently stroking Andras's arm with his finger nails, "a long long time before you were born, my father owned a villa in Tuscany. We produced the best wine in the entire empire."

Empire... Like the Roman Empire? He tries not to look too surprised.

"I hated him."

Andras laughs and curls Agares's hair around his fingers.

"Why?" asks Logan, as a reflex. Him too hated his father when he was alive. And he had damn good reasons to. Agares smiles.

"He never let me do anything" he says, and Andras begins to speak with a high pitched voice

"Why can't I kill this cat Daddy? Why can't I hit the slaves Daddy? Why can't I fuck the farmer's daughter Daddy?" and he laughs like a maniac while Agares nods, amused.

"Anyway once he surprised me fucking a slave boy in the pantry, and he called me sick."

Andras makes a fake sad look

"Saying he's just a child Agrippa", he says, taking a deeper voice than his own, "this madness has to stop!"

He laughs but his eyes remain cold.

"I took a hammer and I smashed his skull."

Logan tries to keep on looking daring, but inside, he feels more and more uncomfortable with this unsettling couple. On the opposite side of the room, he notices Katrina, leaned on a wall. She looks at the pair with an expression of deep disgust, while Kimaris, sit on a table, is juggling with a knife completely ignoring them. Agares continues

"I said the boy did it and you know what was the law in Rome at that time, when a slave killed his master?"

Logan's mouth is too dry, he drinks some bourbon and says he doesn't know.

"They executed all the slaves" he answers, with a very satisfied smile.

"They crucified all of them, men, women and children. All the four hundreds of them"

Andras sighs

"And you loooved it." he says, biting his friend's earlobe.

Agares pushes him away, looking amused

"I heard them moan all night long."

Fucking psycho is written in Logan's eyes. He won't be able to work with that, no damn way.

"I danced around the crosses you know, i had a tambourine... It was raining... And then one of them, one who had been hiding in the bushes... slit my throat"

Andras nods and says

"Sneaky little creatures"

And Agares completes

"That's how I ended up in Hell the first time. So tell me, what about you?"

Logan crosses his arms and mutters

"There was that girl... I hated her..."

He notices a hint of interest in the couple's eyes. Agares cuts him

"Once with the Divine Marquis we fucked a servant girl on a Saint Andrew's cross, before cutting her breast and feeding it to his dogs." he licks his lips and Andras whines, "and you did that without me?"

Logan can't continue, they're... it seems stupid to even say it but they're evil. They're the face of true evil. He used to call her evil, and demon, and he's seen demons and creatures, and monsters but them... It's like they swallow all the light around them. Like there is no more air to breathe in the room.

Agares continues

"If you want your revenge darling boy, I have a lot of ideas"

Logan isn't sure he wants to hear any of them.

* * *

"Commander, we have a problem".

Castiel thinks he should create a drinking game. Every time Hannah tells him they have a problem, he will drink a liquor store. Damn it. He told them, every one of them that he was no leader and he God damn isn't.

"What?" he asks, a little aggressively. Hannah looks embarrassed.

"I've just received a message from the people we appointed at finding the missing angels and uh... they located an important group."

Castiel wonders why this is a problem. They've spent the last few days trying to get everyone together, so...

"They were hiding, hiding from us... Only communicating with human devices, concealing their Graces..."

Gadriel frowns

"Why would angels want to stay on Earth?"

Hannah stutters

"They don't they... want to restore... Heaven's true ruler on his throne."

"God?" he asks

Hannah looks down

"Michael. They want to break inside the Cage and uh... free Michael and his vessel."

Sam shouts

"What? How?"

"I'm thinking blunt force Sam" she says, biting her lip

Saskia asks

"I'm going to sound stupid I know but hum... Is that really a bad thing?"

Castiel glares at her

"Yes. Michael is the last remaining archangel. He's powerful, he wants his Apocalypse and he's batshit crazy."

Everyone turns towards Castiel with a very confused expression. He's really not handling the recent revelations very well.

"Sorry" he says, coughing a little.

Sam adds

"If Lucifer gets out with him... He's gonna come for me."

Rudi cuts

"He'll find you locked son, I'm not letting you out this place without protection tattoos"

Sam smiles anxiously at the older man.

"He's an archangel Rudi I think he can take off whatever he wants to."

Rudi raises an eyebrow

"Did you forget I was Dumbledore?"

Saskia rolls her eyes

"If I say he won't lay a finger on you, then he won't."

Sam nods and thanks him, adding, "Anyway it's better than nothing I guess."

Rudi gets up and says

"I'm going to work on the design right now."

Castiel nods

"Good job... friend."

Gadriel coughs. It's really strange to see Castiel fraternizing with this terribly disrespectful warlock. He has spent centuries in Heaven's Cells for a crime he doesn't remember, and yet, something inside him is still fiercely faithful to God and hopes for his return. Michael on the other hand... He remembers him as a hardhearted war lord. Nothing good can possibly come from him escaping the Cage, especially if Lucifer is freed as well. Plus this could give Hell an occasion to attack Heaven earlier than planned. What can possibly make these angels so reckless?

"We should go back to Heaven right now and see how we can stop this battle from happening. We need to convince everyone than trying to free Michael is only going to start a war with Hell when we are at our weakest."

Hannah shakes her head

"I'm afraid many in Heaven will think it is a good idea"

Castiel nods, he's actually afraid of that as well. Hannah continues

"Let's be realistic here, we're soldiers, well... we used to be soldiers. A lot of us are waiting for a Leader, for a savior and Michael was our Commander in Chief for millenia until he was locked with Lucifer. His disappearance brought a civil war upon us..."

She stops, noticing Castiel's unease. She stutters

"N...not because he was a good leader but because he kept the factions united under his authority, under his... violence. But even if I want something different for Heaven... I also know that a lot of us would just like to be obedient numbers again."

Gadriel continues

"What do you suggest?"

Hannah sighs

"We don't say anything to the others and we try to negotiate with them directly."

Gadriel asks

"With what leverage?"

Castiel cuts

"No. We need to inform everyone. If they want Michael back, let them."

Gadriel and Hannah shout

"What?"

Castiel answers, with a cold voice

"Disclose everything we know, about the Tablets, about our memories, about God. And if they want to be sheep, let them be sheep. At this point, every single thing we'll do will turn against us."

Hannah stutters

"B...but what about Heaven? What about saving our home?"

Castiel's voice hardens

"You can't save people against their will."

Feeling electricty in the air, Linda cuts

"What about this Charlie girl?"

Sam sighs

"Yeah, Charlie. She went to the... I don't know, fairy dimension? There is a portal we can open from here to there but hum..."

Saskia cuts

"I'll go there, I'll find her, and Vivian so we get enough information to find God." she says, looking at Castiel who seems gloomy.

Sam asks

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. You need to stay here and begin your training Sam. Kev?"

Kevin raises his head, surprised

"Yeah?"

"You want to come with me? Maybe we won't need further Tablet translation if we find Vivian in time."

Kevin grins

"You want me to go on a quest with you?"

Saskia smiles back

"That's exactly what I'm asking you Percival."

Kevin turns to Linda who smiles and nods, adding

"Just be safe. And Saskia?"

"Yeah?"

"Deep fry anyone who dares to touch my son, all right?"

Saskia laughs

"Yes Ma'am"

Castiel adds

"I'll come with you." and before Gadriel or Hannah can say anything he adds, "I leave you in charge"

Saskia shrugs her shoulders, looking at the two angels with an embarrassed gaze.

Heaven really seems to be a mess.


	13. Interlude

Hi! First, many thanks for following the story and liking it, that really means a whole lot to me.

As I added quite a few new characters, I thought it could be a a good idea to share with you some pictures, to show you what they look like in my mind. If there are artists among you, I'll be of course thrilled to see this work illustrated, so please, please, please, if you want to create something related to the story, share it in the comments, i'll be honored and very happy!

Images don't work here (unless I didn't understand how it works, which is entirely possible!) so if you want to take a look, it shows on the A03 right there: [archiveofour own DOT org]/works/1668227/chapters/3875224

Love,

Akii


	14. Mutilated

_"Are you sure you want to come with us?"_

Castiel is brooding and Saskia doesn't know if it's a good idea for him to come to Fairy Land instead of taking care of the mayhem in Heaven. She can't watch over two persons, to be honest. She proposed Kevin to accompany her because he's a sweet kid who spent the last weeks underground, ruining his eyes on old scriptures, not because of his outstanding battle abilities. Castiel is tremendously strong of course, but he also seems completely unstable. She doesn't want to carry a depressed celestial being on her back, or see him lose his mind and decide to go all wrath of the gods on a leprechaun village.

I'm a terrible human being, she thinks.

The guy obviously needs a break but he doesn't seem to understand that now isn't really a good time. It's reassuring to see Gadriel and Hannah are willing to take responsibility, though they haven't figured out yet if they're telling the truth to the Angels or not. They should really hurry though. The Knights of Hell have been reformed, apparently, and she couldn't help but notice the concern in Sam's expression. Rudi is pretty confident about trapping Dean, but well, that's Rudi so confidence in his own abilities is is default mode.

_"I'm sure. i want to know why God lied to us."_

Dang it.

They're leaving for Oz in a few minutes, where Charlie was last seen. If she hadn't been so worried by the idea of leaving Sam alone while he's still vulnerable, Saskia could have been very excited. Oz is real. But as Rudi always says, everything is real dear.

_"Behave, all right?" _she told her father, while packing her things. Rudi faked an innocent smile and said _"Don't I always?"._

Saskia laughed and added _"Don't traumatize him, ok?". _

Rudi has a little sociopath side and she doesn't know how Sam is going to react to that. Rudi's nihilist and overly sarcastic personality can be very unsettling to people. To many, he _appears_ like a self confident jerk, really often dismissing people as stupid or ignorant.

_"Be careful about that "superiority" thing. You're german."_

Is one of Saskia's favorite jokes when Rudi seems to consider a little too much that witches and warlocks are better than normal people.

Rudi tried to reassure her, swearing he would take good care of Sam.

Saskia nodded and hugged him before adding

_"Go easy Magneto, and take care."_

Rudi tried to keep his eyes from shining with tears. It was the first time in two years that they were separated, and Saskia was going to an unknown world, alone. Whatever happens, even when your child is close to thirty, you never cease to be a parent.

He never loved anyone more than he loves that kid.

And for the first time in his life, he feels like he could actually settle down with other people. He's always fled communities and covens, it brought back bad, hurtful memories of his youth. When he managed to find how to unlock the door to Oz, he had a hard time repressing a big childish grin. Let's be clear, he knows he's good, he spent thirty years traveling and studying to become the best warlock possible. And even if he had always told himself he didn't need any recognition from anyone, hearing the gang tell him how "awesome" he was really felt good.

When Sam mentioned Oz, and also the fact that the key to open the portal to go there had been taken away by Dorothy, he seemed helpless, saying they had already lost a lot of time.

_"Don't panic my boy" _said Rudi, _"show me the door you used"_

Sam took him to the garage's door, and Rudi started looking at it intensely. Sam wondered what he was seeing. He remembered how Saskia helped him to open his third eye back at Magnus's house, and he tried to do the same.  
Rudi turned to him and smiled

_"Come here son"_

Sam approached and Rudi took his hand. He felt energy flowing, but absolutely no feelings or flashes of memories like the ones he saw when he touched Saskia.

_"I'm warded"_

Said the older man, winking at him. Sam felt embarrassed for even trying to look, and focus on opening his third eye. It didn't hurt as much as the last time, he just felt a little pressure between his eyes.

Solemnly, Rudi said

"_Reveal"_

Sam felt another energy wave and saw the door covered with half erased greenish runes. Rudi was smiling and apparently reading them, looking quite content. Maybe he wasn't entirely joking when he said he was Dumbledore. That man was really impressive, and no one could guess that by just looking at him. He was like the typical next door neighbor you can't remember the name, but magic definitely brought something mysterious and almost frightening to his appearance.

He said

_"I need an image of the key... but I think I can open it, give me a couple of hours. "  
_

Rudi was about to send Sam away when he noticed this could be an opportunity to see if the kid was as promising as Saskia was convinced he was. After all, if they were to spend the next few days together training his ability, they might as well begin right now.

_"What do you think it is?"_ he asked, and Sam smiled discretely, before saying

_"That's a... trace? Of the spell?"_

Rudi nodded.

_"Exactly, the key was made to enchant the door ok? So the key contained a spell to transform the door into a portal."_

Sam looked more closely at the runes

_"Now, there are spells to create portals, Saskia used one to come here, so we have that covered. What do we need?"_

_"Uh..."_ Sam remembered Saskia's portal, and the fact she asked him for his precise location.

_"I guess... the precise symbol for the portal, and... coordinates?"_

Rudi smiled

_"Yes. And everything is written on the door. I just need to check everything with the infos you have one the key, and then I'll draw you a portal symbol to go there"_

Sam touched the door

_"I'd love to understand all of this..."_

Rudi patted his shoulder

_"I can teach you runic one day, if you want, but right now can you just get me the drawing of the key?"_

Sam answers, as a reflex

_"Oh yes sir"_

And Rudi burst out laughing_. _Sam's confused and Rudi said, still amused

_"Sam don't say that, I'm German, so I'm basically traumatized with everything army-related"_

He saw emotion is Sam's eyes and suddenly he understood. He remembered what Saskia told him about her life in the hunting group, the paramilitary craziness, what she called the "yessirs"... He knew Sam and his brother had spent their childhood drifting around with their father, a father quite wary of Sam's abilities. It reminded Rudi of his own father, Georg, and how he... how he...

_"It's ok son, listen..."_

He said, noticing Sam was trying to avoid his gaze.

_" We're going to spend some time together so we need to understand each other ok?"_

Sam looked at him.

_"I'm here to help you, not to order you around. You don't have to do anything I ask you to if you don't want to, you can call me a dick if you want and..."_

He noticed Sam smiled a little

_"...you certainly will because I can really be a pain in the ass with a bloated ego."_

Sam nodded, a thank you stuck in his throat. _  
_

_"If you want, I can show you how to make this portal, you'd like that?"_

He noticed Rudi talked to him with the tone someone would use to talk to a little kid but he didn't mind. He never had a normal relationship with a parent, and these simple intentions put him on the verge of crying, even with the peridot crystal he now wore as a necklace, to keep his fourth shakra normally open, and not swallowing the entire world's emotions. But this came all the way from his childhood, all the way from his desperate need for acknowledgment. Dean used to give him that, a little too much actually. He couldn't stop saying how proud he was of him, how great he had been in this or that hunt, even when Sam had messed up completely, because Dean knew how bad he wanted their father to look at him with a little pride, a little love in his eyes.

He went to the Library get the book which mentioned the key to Oz, and he ran on Saskia who was getting out of the kitchen, where Linda had prepared some snacks for her and Kevin. She asked him if he was all right, and Sam told him he was, noticing Saskia didn't believe him. She said

_"Rudi can be weird sometimes, I know, but he means well"_

Sam said it was fine, and laughed when Linda got out of the kitchen saying

_"I really need to learn some magic as well kids, I feel old and useless!"_

Saskia hugged her, saying she was far from being any of that, adding she was actually the one keeping them alive with her fabulous cooking skills._  
_

_"But I'll teach you some tricks when I'm back", _she added, winking at Kevin's mother. Sam awkwardly hugged her too, thanking her for everything she had done since she arrived, and went back to the garage, followed by Saskia.

_"I'm fine Saskia, seriously", _he said, smiling.

The witch gently took her arm and said

_"I know the effect of family stuff Sam, trust me, I do."_

And she walked back to her room, leaving Sam wondering if she wasn't an empath as well.

When he came back to the door, Rudi had managed to find some green paint somewhere and had begun to draw the portal symbol on the door. He asked Sam to make a transcript of what he saw on the door, while he was studying the symbols engraved on the key.

Sam focused on the door, and managed to see the symbols without Rudi's help. He heard him saying

_"You're already making progress!"_

Sam wanted to say thank you, but noticing he was already getting stronger scared him, instead of making him feel better. Rudi paused and added

_"Don't be afraid of your power son__. You are not a freak, you are extraordinary, just like Saskia. And me."_

He noticed Sam's shoulders shuddered.

_"D__on't be afraid to make a difference_"

While transcribing the runes on a large piece of paper, Sam listened to Rudi's deep voice, telling him his story.

_"You know, I was born in 1960, so fifteen years after the end of the war. I grew up in a coven in Bavaria, and that was a very secluded place."_

When he found out about what had happened during the war, he was appalled by the fact the light covens didn't do anything to stop it, when some dark covens notoriously helped the Nazis in their quest to find the lost Hyperborea. When he was a child, he used to dream about destroying concentration camps and ammunition factories. He had very clear visions of himself, walking into one of those dreadful places and turning it into dust, while cheered by the liberated prisoners.

_"That was of course terribly immodest of me, but I've always thought it was a great sin to have remained neutral. As the head of my coven used to say, we don't mingle in human's affairs. Well millions of people died and I'm pretty sure we could have made a difference."_

Rudi knew his power was strong, and he desperately wanted to use it, to show it to the world. But he had been raised in complete isolation. He explained Sam covens functioned like some kind of sects, completely isolated from the outside world, with all the marriages being arranged to keep the bloodline pure.

_"And I know how it sounds. So many witches were massacred that indeed, our powers would have disappeared if there hadn't been some inbreeding at some point. But now it's far from being necessary. It continues because dark covens and light covens are separated."_

Since the beginning of the Christian era, the covens have been split in Europe between dark magic and light magic, which was, according to Rudi, "utter bullshit".

_"You don't see that in any other part of the world. Magic is magic, light and dark are just the two faces of the same coin. Don't learn one and it's like cutting one of your arms. They're complementary. And the worst thing is, with our growing cultural influence, more and more people do that, separate magic."_

It didn't piss him off just for the sake of magic, but also for personal reason.

_"Because what happens to you when you were born with a power that is considered evil by you coven?"_

He said, and he noticed Sam suddenly stopped writing. Rudi focused, and Sam's pen began to fly around the room. The hunter had never seen Rudi using his power yet and he couldn't repress a "Wow".  
Rudi laughed

_"Well, my parents definitely not "wowed" when I began to make things fly around the nursery"_

His parents were extremely scared by their son's power, and also ashamed. They were both from old light families, and Rudi, Rudger at that time, was their first born.

_"Naturally, my father's first idea was sacrificing me."_

Sam shouted

_"What?"_

Rudi laughed.

_"Good old Georg. Well of course Sam, he knew that soon I would be able to break things, to lift cars and who knows what else, so he thought that the best thing was killing me before I became dangerous."_

Sam mumbled

_"I'm so sorry"_

And thought about what John would have done if he his powers had manifested when he was a child.

_"Don't be. Well Hermann, Saskia's grand father and the head of our beloved community told my father that killing me wouldn't be a good idea, because that would be, I quote, cutting a branch from a very healthy tree"_

Sam shook his head.

_"So instead of that, they decided to isolate me from all the other coven members, and to use the coven's powers to bind me"_

Sam turned, looking interrogative.

Rudi explained to him that covens were not only communities. Forming a coven is also sharing your power, it's a vow every coven member makes when he's considered an adult. As a matter of fact, coven spells are way stronger than any other and can't be erased, except by another coven, with a similar strength. As Rudi's power was considered a threat, the coven decided not to bind his power, considering it wouldn't be possible due to its strength, but Rudi's emotions

_"So I would never get mad enough to snap someone's neck or throw a truck on a kid's head"_

They sealed his fourth shakra, letting it barely open for him to have social interactions, and raised him in complete isolation. That's how he instantly saw the one on Sam's heart when they met.

_"I've never seen another child until I was seven"_

He said, looking suddenly sad. His parents were extremely wary of him and rarely visited him. The only adult he saw everyday was Hermann, who taught him the basics of magic and how to control his power.

_"He was a good teacher, I can grant him that, and he thought I was a fast learner. So when his wife gave birth to a little girl, Rose Helena Scholl, Saskia's mom. Hermann decided we should be engaged to one another."_

Sam jumped

_"At seven?"_

_"Yep. Rose was the only child I got to spend time with and she became a sister to me. She was... adorable"_

He smiled.

_"Not afraid of me at all, really cuddly and loving. Because of what had been done to me I really had trouble bonding with people, but Rose managed to do something incredible. By constantly being with me, she managed to open the seal a little._"

Rudi explained that it sounds cheesy, but love really has tremendous powers. Love is something that can overcome the most powerful spell, and it made Sam thinking about Dean and the Mark, how he told him Cain stopped killing when he met this woman he dearly loved, Colette. Maybe their love could be powerful enough to keep Dean from killing? He thought he should mention it to Rudi, but even if he seems to be a very open minded person, he really didn't want to drive him away, or Saskia, by confessing the truth about his relationship with Dean. He really needed that trap and their help, so he had to be careful.

_"Rose also considered me as her brother, so the more time we spent together, the more impossible it became to think that one day we would get married"_

Sam frowned, well of course, normal people don't marry their sister. Or brother.

_"She was the only one I told about leaving the coven for the United States, and she helped me prepare for it. She was only fourteen you know, but really fierce. And as she was a psychic, she was really helpful in guiding me."_

When Rudi announced he wanted to leave the coven, he knew that it meant he would never see his family or friends again. Those were the rules, when you leave your coven, you leave everything behind. He only secretly left Rose a way to contact him, an enchanted bracelet, and he left for the States.

_"Shortly after I arrived, I designed my anti location spell. To everyone looking for me, it would send the answer "deceased"."_

Rudi seemed suddenly somber

_"Because of what was done to me there, I'm_ _unable to feel normally. It doesn't mean I can't love or be angry, but these emotions are really weak compared to what they could be"_

He explains that he really tried to take the seal off, meeting a lot of other witches and after a few years he came to the conclusion it wasn't possible, and that if it was, he shouldn't do it.

_"They all told me it was done too early in my childhood. That if it was removed, no one could predict what could happen to me, or the people around me."_

He managed to live normally though, but was never interested in friendship or in bonding with a woman. He said, laughing, that he was good looking enough when he was young to have fun when he wanted to, but that he had never fallen in love with anyone, or felt the need to settle down. Until Rose came at his doorstep with Saskia.

_"I loved this kid. I loved her the moment I saw her, and that was the strongest feeling I had ever felt. That's why I was so mad at Rose when she talked about sealing Saskia's powers. I was convinced she could be raised well, happy and healthy with her powers. We had a big fight, and Rose left with her."_

Sam rose and brought him his paper, covered with the transcript, and Rudi started to complete it with other symbols found on the key.

_"Because of what was done to me, I can be put in a situation when there's a risk my emotions would be unleashed."_

He looked intensely at Sam

_"I can't see Saskia threatened Sam. I know that if someone touches a single hair of my daughter, I could possibly turn the world to dust."_

He didn't seem to joke at all.

_"To be honest, I'm glad she burnt all the people who hurt her. Because if she hadn't..."_

He got up and begins to complete his portal symbol with some runes.

_"... I would have tracked them down and killed them all."_

Sam walked close to him and shyly patted his shoulder. Rudy coughed

_"What I want you to understand is that we've all been mutilated, you, me, Saskia... By those so called normal people."_

Sam whispers

_"Yes, we have..."_

_"But it doesn't mean we have to be the way they want us to be. We are powerful, we are special, and we're damn proud of it."_

Sam laughed, and Rudi said

_"Go fetch the kids and the angel, the portal's ready"._

Sam smiled and said

_"Yes...Rudi."_


	15. Drama

Crowley has always loved theater. Even when he was human and women were played by men. And what's going to happen just now is just another drama, just another play. Someone's going to walk on the stage and tell terrible news.

[ Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! ]

The King breathes and tries to remain serious as he pretends to open the Cage's door.

[Tap!]

Dean has trouble remaining calm and Meg discretely positions herself right behind Crowley.

[Tap!]

Crowley cuts his thumb and begins to draw a symbol on the door.

[Tap!]

He smiles

[Curtain Up]

A random demon arrives.

_"My King, I've been informed we'll soon be under attack. Then angels want to free Michael"_

Crowley hides a smile, and says with a dramatic tone

_"Bollocks! Change of plans mate, I can't open this door, it needs to be protected at all costs"_

Dean nods but he can see in his eyes he understood he had been played. Doesn't matter.

He definitely loves theater.

* * *

_"So...Children, angels..."_ says Rudi, with a grin, _"here's how it works"_

He shows the garage's door completely covered in green paint.

_"As you know, we don't have the key anymore, so Sam and I have reproduced the spell. Saskia, I wrote you down everything, in case you don't find Dorothy, so you can still come back, ok?"_

Saskia nods, a little nervous. She's never traveled between worlds and even if she's quite excited, this is really scary, in some ways. Kevin on the other hand looks like a happy camper, he even quoted Bilbo Baggins five minutes ago saying "_I'm going on an adventure!"_. When you see how blue is Castiel, it really compensates.

_"Remember, this isn't another dimension, all right?"_

Sam frowns.

_"What do you mean?"_

Rudi looks surprised

_"Oh yeah, I didn't tell you, it was written in the spell. Well the Fairies live on the same world than us, only on a different vibratory level. This portal doesn't take you to another world, well in this case it does, because Oz isn't located precisely here, but it changes your body's vibratory level"._

Sam doesn't understand what it means and he sees Saskia rolling her eyes, looking amused.

_"Well thanks for telling that now Didi."_

_"What is it?"_ asks Kevin

Saskia chuckles

_"My dearest father just told us that this spell will affect every single atom of our body. I'm thrilled."_

Rudi shakes his head

_"There's no need to be afraid dear, it will work perfectly"_

_"Even for him?"_ asks Saskia pointing at Castiel who's remaining silent.

_"He has a human body so yeah, I don't see what could happen"_

Sam asks

_"Cas? You still want to leave?"_

_"Yes."_

Rudi claps his hands

_"All right!"_

Linda hugs Kevin and Saskia, asking them again to be careful and to deep fry anything threatening. Rudi hugs his daughter close and smooths her hair, visibly a little strangled by emotion. Sam comes to her awkwardly and gives her back her phone he borrowed earlier.

_"I recorded a video for Charlie, here you go"_

Saskia takes her phone and looks at Sam

_"You'll be fine?"_

Sam laughs

_"I'm the one who should ask you that! I'm safe here, and I'm okay."_

He hugs her, and is hit by a flow of anxiety. She doesn't believe him and she thinks he's hiding something from her, something related to Dean. Damn it. How does she do that? He repeats he's going to be fine, and while he's holding her, he realizes how small and slender she is. She can't be more than 5'5, and she was certainly smaller as a teen. Black Hair was fifteen years older and thrice her size. Poor kid. They haven't had any chance to talk about it yet and he hopes there will be an occasion. In spite of everything she says, she still suffers.

_"Let go Sam ok?_" says Saskia, laughing. "_Don't dig into my head too much"_

_"Sorry! I'm so sorry!"_ Sam replies, embarrassed. "_I don't control it yet_."

Saskia smiles, and she turns to the door, reading the symbols. She takes a quartz crystal out of her pocket and she places it right in the middle of the central six pointed star. She begins to mumble things Sam doesn't understand.

_"Runic" _whispers Rudi, _"She's reading what I wrote"_

The green paint begins to glow and Sam's eyes widen in surprise, though Kevin and Linda don't seem to see it. The warlock bumps his arm and says

_"You can see it, can you?"_

With a conniving smile. Sam smiles and nods.

Once the incantation is over, Saskia says in a clear voice: "show me the road to Oz", and this time Linda and Kevin can see the paint glowing so bright they need to hide their eyes. Saskia opens the door, and everyone is struck with amazement, even Sam who has already seen it once. The yellow brick road is right in front of them, and the green castle of Oz is lying on the horizon.

Saskia stutters

_"I... guess... It's good bye..."_

And she crosses to the other side, quickly followed by Kevin who's excited like an eight years old.

_"I can't believe it! I can't fucking believe it!"_

_"Kevin Huan Tran!" _says an half outraged Linda before laughing.

Only Castiel remains calm, Saskia would say gloomy, and hasn't crossed yet.

_"Cas?" _says Sam, coming close to the angel. He looks lost and Sam hugs him, trying to feel something, but it's like staring at a wall. Maybe his power only works on humans? Cas hugs him back, a little long and Rudi interrupts them saying

_"The door is beginning to close Castiel."_

Castiel gently pushes Sam away and replies

_"Oh yes of course."_

He walks towards the door, and the moments he walks through it, is body falls on the floor like a lifeless mannequin, while a light blue shadow is entering Oz.

_"What the Hell happened?" _yells Sam, running to Castiel's body.

Rudi's knelt on the ground and is checking for a pulse.

_"He's breathing and his heart beats... Weakly but it does"_

Sam looks at him, trying not to get angry. Saskia told him Rudi had a tendency to be a little too confident... The warlock rises, and scratches his head before saying

_"I guess it answers a lot of questions."_

The hunter rises and before he can ask what Rudi means, the older man says

_"Your friend didn't need a vessel to cross to Fairy Land."_

While looking at Cas's, well Jimmy's body. Sam realizes what it means.

_"You're not saying..."_

Rudi laughs. He's actually surprised by something, and it's not happened in a very long time.

_"Our friend Cas is a fae."_

Linda is shocked.

_"No fucking way!"_

* * *

Dean needed to kill someone, and the random demon who had just informed Crowley the angels were planning an attack was perfect for that. He was there and he was fucking annoying. Now he's supposed to reform the demonic legions, and fuck it, he's never wanted to go to the army and now he's supposed to be some kind of God damn General.

And he can't even kill Crowley. He can't even send a Knight to kill him since Crowley would summon him for his personal defense. So life sucks. Death sucks. And if he sees another demon in the hallways he's going to turn him into ham dices.

_"Calm down_" whispers Meg

Dean turns to her, and slams her on the wall, holding the Blade on her throat. He looks raging mad.

_"What did you just say?"_

He's changed, he's definitely changed. Meg's used to being a demon, and even if her new powers gave her a temporary high, she still feels like herself. Winchester on the other hand is changing every minute. She needs to calm him down.

_"Maybe I have an idea."_

Dean's eyes turn back to green, and he mumbles an apology.

_"Not here, you'll tell me that later"_

Meg nods, still scared of what almost happened. That's not going to be easy to work with the other knights, except maybe for Kimaris she knows by reputation. She's a very old demon, and is known for having a strong sense of loyalty and honor. She was one of Lucifer's first companions and she remained fiercely faithful to him, so much she's always refused to listen to any other leader. That was why she was locked in Hell's Cells centuries ago. Meg's not even sure how many. She hopes she's still the same, and that she'll be loyal to Dean. If so, it could help for her new plan to get rid of Crowley. Not sure Dean likes said plan though.

In the waiting room, Andras and Agares are cuddled on a chair like psycho cats, if that's even a thing. Meg knows them by reputation too. They're old, Agares is something like 2000 years old or so, Andras closer to 1000. And if rumors are true, Andras was tortured by Agares when he arrived in Hell, and after decades he became basically his pet. Somehow even crazier than his master. If they have loyalty it's only to each other, and they were locked away for good reasons. They were too cruel, too bloodthirsty, too power hungry, and that says a lot in Hell. They're Lilith crazy. They're maybe the only people to actually enjoy being tortured and just being in the same room that them makes Meg uncomfortable.

She doesn't know Katrina but the profound despise she sees in her gaze as she looks at the evil couple makes Meg think she could be an ally. And the last one... Logan? Nothing particular. He's sit on the ground, as far away as possible from Andras and Agares and he looks really somber.

_"Gather round" _says Dean

Everybody gets up and comes close to him, Agares and Andras walking slowly enough to arrive last, side by side.

_"We're under attack. Apparently the angels are planning to free Michael from the Cage, and we need to defend our positions."_

Kimaris raises her hand and Dean nods. She has a surprisingly soft voice, and before beginning, she bows and says

_"It's a honor to serve you, Bearer of the Blade. May I ask you respectfully why we don't release Lucifer from his prison?"_

Dean sighs, tilts his head and replies

_"Because the King intends to remain the King? Our loyalty is to him Kimaris."_

Kimaris bows and adds

_"As you command. I used to have many legions under my authority, I can begin recruiting this instant."_

Dean nods, and says

_"Who else has already commanded legions?"_

Agares bows and says

_"I have, Master."_

And he adds, with a suave voice, while planting his cold eyes in Dean's

_"At your service"_

Andras does exactly the same act, and Meg wants to slap him. Well them. Both of them. Hypocritical scum.

Dean turns to her

_"Meg, you had people under your authority before right?"_

She nods.

_"Okay, you'll be my second in command. Katrina? I want you to team up with someone experienced. Who do you choose?"_

Katrina looses her blank face for a minute and seems surprised. She didn't expect to have any kind of choice.

_"I choose Kimaris."_

Kimaris bows a little, with a respectful smile. Dean continues

_"Logan?"_

Logan has a choice between Plague and Cholera and doesn't seem pleased at all.

_"Logan?"_

They're both nuts, but Agares seems less nuts. Though it could only be an appearance. He was always told not to trust the appearances. So maybe it's the most exuberantly mad of the two that's actually the less dangerous. He has to take a bet. Okay...

_"Andras."_

Andras discretely smiles, curtsying and saying

_"Excellent choice"_

While looking at Agares.

_"You'll be fine on your own Agares?"_

Says Dean, staring at the demon. There is something very unsettling in his gaze. He looks like a snake. You can't know what he thinks. He could be happy or ready to swallow you alive.

_"More than fine Master."_

He answers. That guy really gives me the creeps, thinks Dean.

_"All right, recruit your Legions. Go."_

Agares coughs

_"Pardon me Master, but are we allowed to use discipline?"_

The psycho wants to torture, thinks Meg. Dean doesn't give a damn. They're demons. Whatev's.

_"Do whatever you need so your legion is loyal, efficient and ready to fight."_

Agares smiles a little wider, and seems really content.

_"That will be done" _

He says, while leaving the room. Kimaris and Katrina leave right after him, after having thanked their Commander again. Andras come closer to Logan and says with a wicked smile

_"We're going to have a lot of fun you and I"_

Logan stares at him and whispers, in a very aggressive tone

_"I ain't your friend Andras, you hear me? I'm just respecting orders here, right?"_

Andras keeps smiling, adding

_"As you like _chaton"

While walking out of the room. Logan doesn't know what he called him, but he's sure he won't like it when he does.

Finally Meg and Dean are alone, and they can both breathe a little.

_"I hate my recruits"_

Says Dean, heavily sitting on an armchair.

_"You can trust Kimaris, I've been told she was loyal"_

Dean sighs

_"She's a demon."_

Meg sits in front of him and says

_"Well you too Einstein"_

Before really regretting. But Dean just bitterly laughs.

_"Yeah. I know that thanks"_

He pours himself a glass of bourbon and drinks it whole.

_"And I can't even get wasted."_

Meg takes another glass and adds

_"Maybe but you can still enjoy the taste..."_

He looks lost, staring at his empty glass. He certainly hoped he would be out by then, and he's still stuck down there. She can't help but feeling a little sorry for him.

_"Dean, about my idea."_

He shakes his head a little and asks

_"Yeah what?"_

She bites her lip, takes his hand and teleports them outside. It's the first time since Mount Everest that Dean breathes fresh air and it feels really nice_. _But that's not a good idea, Crowley's going to notice he's away.

_"Where are we?" _he asks, looking around. Everywhere there is just... grass. No tree, no electric wire, just endless hills covered in grass.

_"Central Mongolia, we don't have much time until the Scottish bastard summons you so hear me out... And don't freak out."_

Dean nods.

_"We need to get rid of Crowley, and for that we need a new King, ok? We can't kill him and we certainly won't free Lucifer."_

Dean agrees and Meg continues

_"In Hell you don't become King just like this, you have to make a claim and to be chosen by the other demons."_

_"Or kill everyone in your way" _says Dean, remembering Abaddon. Meg replies

_"Yeah but in the end it's still a choice, even if it's made out of fear. Whatever... Dean... You'll have to take us to battle, and to win."_

Dean jumps. He certainly don't want to fight the angels, even if he hates their guts. Not for their sake but for Cas's. He can't be asked to fight Cas. And being involved in a war with the angels is a whole new level of fucked up in his already completely fucked up life.

_"No, Meg..."_

Meg grabs his arms

_"Listen to me. I know what you think..."_

Dean sees something unexpected in her eyes. Concern? Is she thinking about Cas too?

_"But if you win this battle, if we win this battle, you'll have the demons' respect. Win this battle and claim the throne. They will give it to you."_

Dean shakes his head. No. He doesn't want to be King of Hell. The simple thought of it makes him want to scream hysterically.

_"I'll make the claim for you. I'll convince the other Knights to support it. If you're the King you get your free will back."_

It makes sense. Meg strengthens her grip on his arms and adds

_"If you're the King you can end this. Hell. You can end it."_

Dean realizes what it means. But of course. It's certainly much easier to destroy Hell from the inside that from the outside. If he's King, he can decide to free all the prisoners, all those being tortured and transformed into demons. With the Blade and the Crown, he can end it all.

And finally die in peace.

_"Warn Cas. Let's do this."_

With a life like his, it almost sounds like a happy ending.


	16. Good People

**_Hi guys! I just wanted to tell you thanks for still being there!_**

**_Your comments and kudos go straight to my writer's little heart :)_**

**_Trigger warning for this chapter (sexual violence)._**

* * *

_"You can't be serious"_

Sam can't believe he's just heard that Cas might be a fairy, and even if now is really not the time, he's grinning like a kid thinking what Dean would have to say about that. He would certainly have a thousand punchlines ready for that moment, maybe a million.

_"I'm afraid I am. Either he's a fae, or Heaven is on the same vibratory level than Fairy Land"_

Says Rudi, while examining Castiel's body. He opens the angel's eyes and takes his pulse, apparently everything is normal. Rudi sits on the ground and adds

_"To be honest I'm quite confused, and that doesn't happen a lot"_

Sam sits next to him, as does Linda, who gently holds Castiel's hand. Sam asks

_"If Heaven is on the same... vibratory level than Avalon... Could it mean it's a part of it?"_

Rudi frowns

_"Theoretically it could, but it doesn't make sense. Angels would know, fairies would know..."_

He pauses, scratching his scalp.

_"Anyway it doesn't matter, we can't deduce much here, and we have to begin your training Sam. Let Saskia, Kevin and Cas figure out what's going on"_

Sam nods and replies

_"Okay, let's carry him to one of the bedrooms"._

* * *

On the Yellow Brick Road, Castiel still looks like himself, and neither Kevin nor Saskia have seen his body fall on the other side of the door while it was closing. They were too busy singing "_We're off to see the Wizard_" and laugh their ass off. Castiel himself haven't seen anything. The moment he stepped on the road the door disappeared, so he didn't hear Sam's scream.

He feels strangely well. It's not really something he can describe, but it feels like déjà vu, or... not really. He just feels... comfortable and safe. A smiles appears on his face, and he looks at the landscape, amazed. The light is golden, everything is bright, beautiful, perfect. He hears himself thinking "as it should be", and he really doesn't know where it's coming from.

_"Cas, you ok dude?" _asks Saskia

Castiel realizes he has stopped walking for a while. Kevin is a yard away and Saskia has run back to get him.

_"Oh uh... yes I'm fine" _he says, and he notices Saskia's grinning.

_"You're smiling!" _she adds, looking quite happy, _"That's a summer solstice miracle!"_

Cas almost answers it doesn't exist before understanding it was certainly one of those jokes he still doesn't get. He laughs a little and walks with her. His body feels strangely light. Usually, when he's in his vessel he feels heavy, almost uncomfortable, whereas here it's like... moving in water. It feels natural.

_"Do you feel... different?" _he asks Saskia

The witch frowns and after a moment says

_"No. I feel normal. I'm happy Rudi didn't send us in the Dagoba System."_

Cas laughchuckles, it's nice to understand these ones. He adds

_"Well lets hope we're not in the middle of a Death Star"_

And Saskia laughs openly, saying

_"I like you so much right now!"_

Castiel smiles and soon they have reached Kevin. He needs to, as Dean would say, get his shit together. The witch is strong but she might need protection, and Kevin Tran has been through enough. He was really tempted to forbid him to come, but then again, who is he to forbid anything to anyone? Right now Hannah and Gadriel must be dealing with a massive temper tantrum in Heaven, and he just fled. He can tell all the crap he wants, he didn't walk through that door because he was so eager to find God, but mostly because he just didn't want to face the Angels.

Or a war against Hell. A war against Dean.

He doesn't want to see his friend with black eyes, he doesn't want to see him kill. He's been teased many times and by many different people for caring about Dean, but to him, those people didn't know what friendship really was. Dean is his only friend, the first person to consider him as an individual and he never gave up on him. So Cas won't either. He will save him. But he doesn't want to see him that way.

He also knows that if Dean's involved in that battle, then he might as well leave Heaven for good and live like Balthazar or Gabriel used to, hidden. Because there is no way the angels will forgive him for refusing to fight Dean Winchester, yet again.

Maybe they were right, after all. Maybe there's nothing worth fighting for in Heaven.

Maybe the angels deserve to disappear. Their Grace are fading. Who knows if it isn't a blessing in disguise? They've never done anything for this world, except killing each other and other people.

_"Okay that's strange"_

Castiel's depressing thoughts are interrupted by Kevin's voice. They're standing in front of a emerald green bridge, and Kevin is pointing at a wooden board.

_"Isn't that Enochian?"_

Castiel looks at it and reads _"You're entering the great city of Oz". _Kevin is right. How is that even possible?

_"So what... the faes speak your language? I'm confused" _says Saskia.

The angel is shocked

_"You're not the only one"._

* * *

Sam and Rudi have just tucked Castiel's body in a bed, in one of the empty bedrooms, and Linda has put him under infusion of water. Who knows how long he will be gone?

To prevent Jimmy Novak from waking up, Rudi has put him into a deep sleep, managing to make Sam and Linda laugh by calling himself Maleficent. "_Don't worry_", he said " _you won't have to kiss him to wake him up_". Sam laughed, but it made him think about Dean. Would Rudi say the same thing, if it was Dean he had to put to sleep? What would his reaction be if Sam answered he really didn't mind?

That he wouldn't mind doing way more, way way more and that he'd done before?

What would Linda think?

They would probably look disgusted. They would probably think they're both sick. And Sam is still harassed by that dream about drinking Dean's blood. He doesn't know if it has anything to do with the awakening of his power. He just knows that if Dean appeared on his doorstep and offered him a drop he would drink it the way a man stuck in the desert for a week would drink his first drop of water. With want, desperation and utmost gratitude.

And then he would let him do whatever he wants to him. Whatever he wants.

It's a good thing Rudi spent time boosting their defenses, calling Magnus a "_stupid amateur magician_", making Saskia laugh and say with a fake German accent "_Ladies and Gents, Rudger Hartfeld in all his glory_".

_"Sam?"_

Rudi is staring at him.

_"You're okay son?"_

Don't call me that, thinks Sam. You don't know what's in my head right now, you wouldn't call me that if you knew. Linda is looking at him with concern and Sam wonders how long it would take for her to take Kevin away when she knows about Dean and him. Kevin does, even if he's never mentioned it, Sam is pretty sure he guessed they were closer than they seem to be. But how closer exactly?

Rudi has put a hand on his shoulder and is whispering

_"Sammy?"_

Sam's eyes are instantly full of tears

_"Don't..."_

He can't continue. Rudi gently pats his shoulder

_"You peridot is full, it's not protecting you anymore, come with me"_

They walk together to the nearest bathroom, and Rudi takes Sam's necklace off. Sam let's him do it, just like a child. There is a hurricane of emotions inside of him and he's afraid if he says just one thing it's going to burn him alive.

Rudi turns on the water and puts the stone under the flow. He says, gently

_"Look, you see the water?"_

Sam looks at it and doesn't see anything out of the ordinary until he remembers what Rudi and Saskia mean by "_look_", "_look with your third eye_". He focuses for a minute, and he sees what looks like black smoke inside the crystal. Rudi is holding the stone in his palm, and Sam can see the smoke leaking out of the stone and disappearing with the water.

_"You need to clean your crystals regularly Sam, Saskia didn't tell you?"_

Sam mutters she didn't and Rudi chuckles

_"She probably didn't think you would have to do that so soon. The peridot absorbs the overflow of feelings okay? When it's full it can absorb anything more and it starts giving you back what it stored"_

So that's why he suddenly felt so bad.

_"There's holy water in the pipes here so that's good, though spring water would be best. When you feel it's not working anymore, you come here and you rinse it. Be thankful for its help, thank it, come on"_

Sam thinks it's a strange idea but he thanks the stone.

_"Stones, crystals have a soul of their own. When you work with one you choose it, but it also chooses you."  
_

Sam mutters

_"Really?"_

_"Yeah. They're really old. They're mountains, turned to dust by Time, turned to crystal by the Earth. They're to be respected. Just like water. This water right here is the same water that filled the first oceans. Every single atom of it is billions of years old."_

_"Thank you... Thank you so much for your help." _Sam says, with more conviction, and Rudi hands him the crystal. It starts to glow, and Rudi says

_"It heard you."_

Sam smiles, amazed.

_"Now put it back on kiddo."_

Rudi adds, patting Sam's back. Saskia's right, the kid's hiding something, and it's eating him from the inside. Rudi hopes he will soon trust him enough to confess it, frankly with everything he has seen in 54 years, it can't be that bad.

After a few minutes, Sam feels like he can breathe more easily, like a weight has been lift from his chest, and he can look at Rudi and Linda without fearing they would leave him or hate him if they knew the truth about who he is. Rudi is sit on a chair near Castiel's bed, reading one of the books Saskia brought with her, and Sam is leaning on the wall, remaining silent.

_"Sam..." _says Rudi, still looking at his book, _"how do you feel?"_

Sam stutters

_"Uh...bet...better I guess. Thanks."_

Rudi looks at him, and Sam sees that he knows he's hiding something.

_"This book is very, very old you know. I bought it in Shanghai maybe... I don't know fifteen years ago?"_

Sam sighs a little, he really doesn't want to talk about himself.

_"It was really, really expensive you see... something like... ten thousand dollars, more or less."_

Sam can't repress his surprise.

_"You want to know how I can afford not working, traveling, buying those things and owning two houses?"_

He says, with a mischievous half smile.

_"I robbed a bank when I arrived in America. I entered it, I compelled everyone to stay still, took the money and left."_

Sam laughs

_"Seriously?"_

Rudi shrugs his shoulders

_"Yeah. I didn't want to work, I wanted money because, let's be honest, in this day and age, money is freedom, so I stole it. And I absolutely don't feel guilty, I resent the financial system."_

The hunter sits on a chair, still laughing and says

_"I live on stolen credit cards so I guess I can't judge."_

Rudi smiles

_"Well, if you want, I can open you a bank account and fill it. It's not like I earned what I have!"_

Sam looks moved

_"Rudi..."_

The older man goes back to reading for a minute and then adds

_"Just think about it ok? Saskia refused because she has her shop and she's too proud. But I've seen what you're wearing, what you're eating and basically what you own... Not much, kid, not much. A little extra money would do you some good."_

Sam nods, and thanks him again, saying he will think about it. He's about to leave the room when Rudi stops him, adding

_"Sam... I'm not a good person, I mean I'm not what people label as 'good people'. I'm a thief, I'm antisocial, I don't really appreciate the company of, as Saskia would say, Muggles..."_

He closes his book and laughs a little

_"I've tried every possible drug in the seventies, I've been a terrible partner to all the women I've been with, I've hurt people with my power, some by accident, and some because I wanted to..."_

He gets up and walks towards Sam.

_"I see there is something bothering you, okay? I do. But whatever you did", _he stares at Sam, _"or whatever your brother did, it won't change the fact that I will help you, and that Saskia will help you."_

Sam nods, and Rudi continues

_"I won't judge you. I'm not in any position to."_

Sam whispers

_"Thank you."_

Rudi pats his shoulder and says

_"Good. Now, ready to get tattooed?"_

Oh yes, the protection tattoos, he has completely forgotten about that.

_"Oh uh yeah."_

_"Do you want to hide them under something like Saskia did or are you okay with the symbols?"_

Sam remembers Saskia's new tattoo, several black birds, nightingales, she said. Symbols of love, nostalgia and maybe a reference to that beautiful poem by John Keats. Knowing Saskia's past, it's no surprise she chose these birds. He's never thought about something he would really like to see on his skin, he has always seen tattoos as something necessary for protection, like some kind of shield, not like an art form or something which could have a personal meaning.

He looks puzzled. Rudi grins and says

_"Me, I have Yggdrasil, the Cosmic Tree of the Norse Mythology."  
_

He turns around and takes his shirt off. His whole back is covered with a huge stylized black tree that goes from his shoulders to his lower back. The level of details is really impressive and it really looks like an artwork. The warlock adds, with a sadder voice

_"That's what gave Rose the idea of Saskia's first tattoo."_

The cherry tree branch, of course. Sam remembers it quite well, and indeed Rudi's tattoo seems to function the same way, but with way more spells.

_"How many protections do you have? That thing is enormous..."_

Rudi puts his shirt back on and says

_"Loads. I traveled to many places, with many different kind of magic and with many different threats. Follow me."  
_

They walk to Rudi's room, and he shows Sam the design he made for him. Sam can't repress a "wow". The symbols are drawn inside a pattern that looks like...

_"Is that a mandala?" _he asks

Rudi pats his shoulder, smiling, and says

_"Exactly. I figured we wouldn't have much time to train you so I designed that tattoo as a... how can I say, helping tool?"_

The warlock explains Sam that mandalas represent the universe and are also meditation tools.

_"They depict a pure land, the Nirvana, as opposed to the impure chaotic one, Samsara, our world, marked by the endless circle of death and rebirth."_

Sam whispers

_"Rebirth?"_

_"Don't tell the angel not all souls go to Heaven, he could be traumatized." _says Rudi, looking sarcastic.

Sam is actually shocked. They never had any proof that reincarnation was real, and Rudi seems to think that it's quite obvious.

_"What do you mean? Where do the others go?"_

Rudi frowns

_"Well, they go back to the... Life Stream? To the Universal Energy?"_

Sam sits on Rudi's bed, and the warlock realizes he had no idea what he was talking about.

_"Sam... Demons can die, angels can die... Where do you think their souls go when they're dead?"_

Sam looks at him confused and says

_"I thought it was an interesting metaphysical question."_

Rudi pats his shoulder and adds

_"Then here's your answer."_

The kid doesn't need to know more yet. Rudi coughs and finishes to explain what the design is about.

_"The interest of this pattern is that it makes of your body a safe space, it brings you peace by balancing all your shakras. And inner peace means control, control over your empathy, and over your demon-smiting mojo. "_

Sam gets up and looks at the paper

_"You have of course all the protection spells you need, anti location, anti demon possession, anti angel possession, anti vampire, werewolves, various curses..."  
_

Sam laughs

_"That's an armor!"_

And he adds

_"How does the anti angel possession symbol works?"_

Rudi looks a little embarrassed.

_"Well... Gadriel possessed you once, right?"_

Sam nods.

_"I figured that hum... I could use some of his Grace, mixed with some of your blood, to tattoo an angel banishing sigil. He was kind enough to give me what I needed."_

Sam bites his lip. He's not sure he wants some of Gadriel's Grace back in his body but that's actually very clever. _  
_

_"That way even if you accept to be a vessel, the angel entering your body will be cast out."_

Sam says

_"I'm honestly impressed..."_

_"Frankly Sam, if it works the way I intend it to, you'll be able to make lots of progress within days."_

The hunter gets up and takes his shirt off.

_"Okay then, let's armor me. And do it like that, I love the design."_

Rudi grins

_"All right! Let's roll bikers!"_

* * *

_"I thought we were supposed to train our legions Andras" _says Logan, annoyed.

Andras has spent a lot of time trying to find his former companions, and if a lot of them are still alive, an even bigger lot died, and it made him sulky and cruel. Logan had to witness him organize fights between demons and Hell Hounds to decide who was worthy to join his battalions and he heard Agares recruited his soldiers in gladiators fight. Why oh why couldn't the two wackos team up?

Now their legions are finally complete, the boy has decided he had the right to make a little field trip on Earth, and he's enjoying every minute, since he hasn't been out since 1792. They came to one of those boring small Midwest towns Logan knows so well, and Andras has been marveling at everything, cars, shops, clothes, people and food included. Logan on the other hand despise these ugly places, it brings back bad memories of Rick. Thinking about his father makes him tense and angry and he's pretty sure that if he saw, right now, someone who just looks like him he would cut his head off.

In a way, he's glad that being a Knight of Hell allowed him to keep his original appearance, but all the cigarette burns on his forearms, he would have liked to forget them. How many times did the old man make him pay for his mother's death, he wonders. Like he could be responsible for breast cancer, like it deserved to listen to his alcohol induced delirium about the loss of the love of his live. He burnt him and then he apologized like the pathetic drunk fool he was. When he stopped drinking and began to wear those stupid AA badges, he made everyone believe that he was the ideal group leader, fair and everything when Logan knew, perfectly knew what kind of violent and unfair scum he was. Rick knew too, and he used his fists more than once to stop his son from "disrespecting" him.

If he had listened to him once, just one fucking time, he wouldn't have brought the red-haired witch and her spawn to the group, and he wouldn't be dead. The whole group, Rick and Logan included would certainly still be there, they wouldn't have been burnt alive by the yellow eyed Saskia Jager.

Well that's a success, now he's pissed.

And if their commander learns they're frolicking in that Shithole instead of working they're gonna be in huge trouble. It's really, really not the time to fool around.

_"When did you die?" _asks Andras, while eating an ice cream he's just stolen.

Logan mumbles

_"In 2002."_

Andras suggestively licks his ice cream and says

_"Aren't we young..."_

Logan glares at him

_"Stop the crap Andras. If you want to fuck someone, fuck someone, but stop the pornstar act, I don't give a shit about it."_

Andras stops walking and begins to laugh, but there's something very strange about it. It's like a half forced, half hysterical laugh. He throws his ice cream on the floor and says, with a much deeper voice than usual, staring at Logan with his now black eyes

_"You're right."_

On the other side of the street, a dozen of teenagers are playing basketball, and before Logan can move a finger, Andras is standing in the middle of them, grinning, with a knife in both hands.

_"Oh...shh..."_

If Logan's power are new for him, Andras is an old demon and he's way faster. When Logan arrives, it's already too late, the blond boy has killed everyone except one girl he has dragged with him somewhere. The dismembered bodies are scattered in a pool of blood, and Logan would throw up if he could. It reminds him of Hell, he's been one of these bodies way too many times.

Logan is yelling Andra's name, but he can't find him. He soon hears sirens and people screaming, and as if he had forgotten he was a demon, he runs away from the police, soon arriving in the nearby woods when he's stopped by someone grabbing his arm. He turns around with his knife in hand, but it's Andras, looking ecstatic, covered in blood.

_"Looking for me?" _he says, winking. And he drags him further into the woods. The girl is there, under an oak tree, her shoes and shorts have been tossed a few feet away, and it's clear he has beaten her up... and worse. Andras lets go of Logan's arm and asks

_"You want some?"_

She's blond. Slender.

It reminds him of this night, the night before the fire. How he overpowered her so easily. He had taken some coke. He felt like he had the right to.

_"It was your idea"_

Says Andras, looking disappointed.

The next evening he had her dragged into the common room and he tried to humiliate her, to make her pay for what he had become, because it was her fault right?

_"Please... please let me go..." _mumbles the girl who's just waken up. Andras catches her neck and slams her against the oak's trunk hissing

_"I don't remember I told you you could talk."_

And then, turning to Logan

_"Sure you don't want?"_

Logan shakes his head.

He had chained her up and she melt the chains, before melting his face, laughing.

_"She's sweet sixteen though. I thought you'd like"_

Adds Andras, smiling, and petting the girl's hair. How does he fucking know?

The girl is crying and Andras rolls his eyes.

He stabs her right in the heart and Logan represses a "NO!", biting his lip until it bleeds.

Andras licks his knife and walks towards Logan, standing close, way too close to him. He wipes the other side of his blade with his thumb and rubs it on Logan's lips, whispering

_"I know you want it. Trust me, I know you do."_

Logan licks his lips.

_"I used to be just like you."_


	17. Fallen Angels

Sam is in his bathroom, looking at his tattoo in the mirror, and it looks honestly beautiful. It covers his back from his shoulders to his waist, and the best part is he didn't feel a thing, contrary to what he remembered of the making of Saskia's tattoo.

_"Pain isn't part of yours" _explained Rudi, with a somewhat sad voice. _"Saskia's first tattoo was partly made with her mother's blood. The power binding ritual involved pain, and it wasn't designed to be removed. If she hadn't been a healer... I could have killed her when I took it off."_

That was also why it took almost a year to tattoo Saskia's back, because she was eight years old and couldn't handle the pain. A year long torture to prevent her from becoming a monster she had never been. Rudi's tattooing technique was very different, and remarkable. He created different types of inks, mixed with other ingredients like crushed crystals, angel's Grace and God knows what, and then, using his power, he stamped every single symbol directly into Sam's skin without using a needle. It was fascinating to see the ink fly out of its bottle and then take the symbol's shape. Sam didn't suffer, and instead of taking weeks to be made, the tattoo was complete in simply four hours, at the end of which Sam fell into a deep sleep.

When he woke up, he felt a little light headed, and went straight to the bathroom. His back isn't red, there's no sign of inflammation, and he wonders how Rudi did that. The ink seems a little glossy, and it doesn't hurt when he touches it. His body feels strange though. It's like he's walking on cotton. Maybe that's a secondary effect of the tattoo. On a positive note, he does feel really calm. Maybe that's what's odd. He's never calm. He's always been anxious, for as long as he can remember. He's never slept without having at least one nightmare. Now he's just... fine. And it feels weird.

He puts a shirt on and gets out of his room, where he sees Linda, going in his direction with tea and biscuits on a plate.

_"Rudi told me you were about to wake up, and I thought you could want a little snack." _she says, smiling to him. He looks healthier, somehow. His eyes are brighter, so is his skin, as if he had just spent some holidays in the country, when he's been buried in the bunker for weeks now. The German guy seemed pretty confident when he told Linda _"you'll see a completely different person when Sam wakes up" _and well he was kind of right, though Sam is still himself, there's something impressive about him. Something she can't quite grasp, but it's there.

Sam thanks Linda and takes the plate, accidentally brushing her finger. He closes his eyes for a moment a clearly sees a way inside her mind. He opens his eyes, opens his third eye, effortlessly, and sees Kevin's mom surrounded with shades of different colors, and those energy points, those shakras, Rudi was talking about. Some are mildly open, some are almost close...

_"Sam? Sam what are you staring at?" _says Linda, a little uneasy.

Sam realizes he's been staring at her heart and he feels terribly embarrassed.

_"So...sorry I think I spaced out..." _he says. It's less weird than saying he was staring at her fourth shakra and wondering if he should take a look or not.

_"Hey! Look who's up! How do you feel?"_

Rudi's in the corridor, happily smiling, and he follows Sam to his room. Sam sits on his bed and slowly sips his tea. It tastes wonderful, he had never noticed. After a minute he answers

_"Fine. A little slow, maybe, but fine."_

He eats a biscuit and adds

_"Tell me I didn't sleep for two weeks again."_

Rudi laughs

_"No dear. Just twelve hours, a nice big night. So, do you feel more in control?"_

Sam focuses and he sees Rudi's colors. His fourth shakra is indeed warded. Instead of being green like his and Linda's, it's black with just a little green circle in the middle. Without thinking, Sam approaches his fingers from it, and feels like an electric shock going through his arm. A warning.

_"Careful with that" _says Rudi, with a sad smile.

Sam raises his head, and the warlock sees his eyes have turned to gold. The hunter swallows and says

_"That's really strong"_

Rudi ruffles his hair

_"It sure is. You do seem in control if you can see it so easily."_

Sam sighs

_"Oh yeah, that's what you asked. Sorry... I feel numb."_

Rudi laughs

_"You don't feel numb, you feel good. I guess that's confusing after having spent years being constantly on edge."_

Sam chuckles. He's right, he's never felt that relaxed except... Except in Dean's arms, with his faced nudged in his brother's neck, feeling his pulse under his lips.

_"It's time you go out and see the sun again Sam, now you're protected we can begin that training."_

Sam smiles, the sun... fresh air... It's going to feel just like a dream.

If only Dean could be there... Would he be freaked out by Sam's powers again?

Now isn't the time to get anxious about it. Dean isn't here yet.

But he will soon be back home, Sam knows it. Somehow, even without being trained yet, he feels already strong enough to save him.

* * *

_"You're not the one I was expecting."_

Meg, possessing a National Park Ranger, is sit under a giant Sequoia, and instead of Clarence it's his new buddy Gadriel who comes to the rendez-vous. Something's not right.

_"Castiel couldn't come, I'm sorry."_

Says Gadriel, trying to sound relaxed. In reality, he's absolutely not fond of the idea of being alone in this forest with a Knight of Hell, even if Castiel told him to trust her before he left for Fairy Land. Just don't tell her where I went, he said, and Gadriel doesn't intend to disclose anything to a demon anyway.

_"He's not dead, is he?"_

Asks Meg, faking sarcasm. She doesn't want to show she cares. She doesn't know that guy.

_"No, he's fine, I promise you. So, what did you want to tell him?"_

Meg sighs.

_"Some of you want to attack Hell to free Michael from the Cage. Crowley ordered Dean to reform Hell's legions, it's been done, they're in training."_

Gadriel sits on a dead trunk. That's no good. If he discloses this information to the other angels, the will definitely decide to back the rogue group up.

_"Listen, tell Clarence... Tell Castiel not to show up. This battle is going to happen, and I can promise you we're stronger than you. You don't want Michael and Lucifer out, don't you? So don't interfere."_

Gadriel frowns.

_"It was never about freeing Lucifer, from what I heard"_

Meg rolls her eyes

_"Are you really that naive? Sam Winchester's alive, the third wheel brother is in the Cage with them... Everything's in place for Apocalypse 2.0."_

Gadriel shakes his head, confused. She might be right, unfortunately. She adds

_"Crowley has absolutely no interest in freeing Lucifer, he wants to remain King of Hell."_

The angel clenches his fists

_"Speaking of... what happened to you trying to get rid of Crowley?"_

Meg gets up

_"It's in progress."_

Gadriel rises and catches her wrist

"_There are a lot of chances that Heaven will get involved. A lot of us, and a lot of you are going to die if this battle happens. Can't you do anything else to stop it?"_

Meg smirks

_"I don't want to stop it. That's how I get rid of the Scot. Dean doesn't want to kill his angel buddy so I'm just passing on what he said."_

The angel groans

_"What's the next step then, attacking Heaven?"_

Meg shakes her arm and gets rid of Gadriel's grip

_"If we're lucky, no. If you're clever you won't get involved in this. We're stronger than y'all and you don't want Michael and Luci out at least as much as I do."_

Gadriel replies

_"I'm afraid I'm not the one who decides"_

Meg scratches her scalp, laughs, and adds

_"Then I guess you're screwed."_

And she disappears.

Hannah is at this precise moment trying to convince everyone than trying to free Michael is a suicide mission that will bring them nothing but a war with Hell at a terrible moment, but Gadriel is afraid that with this new infos, angels are going to decide they need their old leader to crush the Legions. Before he left one even said that if they fight, maybe God will come back and restore Heaven and their Graces seeing that they remained faithful. Idiots.

Poor gullible idiots. Gadriel understands now why some angels like Gabriel left Heaven for good when they had the chance. If Gabriel was alive, at least they would have a proper leader to guide them.

If only Gabriel was alive, maybe he could stop the incoming war.

* * *

Katrina is staring at Kimaris and is stunned by her... kindness? She's a natural leader, she doesn't have to raise her voice or to threat her soldiers. People came to her knowing her reputation, and she had no discipline to do. Everything is going surprisingly smoothly when she heard that Agares is already crucifying people. Well he's a madman so he certainly also does it because he likes it.

Kimaris is showing her soldiers how to fight with a spear, and she's fast, graceful, even. When she was human, Katrina used to be a soldier, a Mino, in the kingdom of Dahomey. White people used to call them the African Amazons, for they were fearless and fierce in battle. Before she was nicknamed Katrina, for being strong and destructive as a hurricane when she fights, she used to be called Ayo. Joy. Doesn't suit her that much anymore. Didn't suit her already when the war between France and Dahomey began and when she spent her days killing white men, trying to defend what was remaining of her country, trying to defend King Behanzin's throne. She was feared by the French, called bloodthirsty and merciless, but what kind of mercy can you show to those who come with machine guns to invade your land and steal everything you own?

She still hates them. Soldiers, slave owners, thieves, thugs. Those who destroy the world, exploit the third world children while unhealthily revering their own, pollute nature until the point of return and all this for what? Profit, money, greed.

Kimaris doesn't seem to hate anything or anyone. She's duty personified. Katrina arrived in Hell because the only thing she wished for, when that French soldier shot her, was revenge. Revenge on this man, his family, all of his offspring, his friends and neighbors. Revenge for the slaughtered women and children in the "pacified" villages. Revenge for the rapes. Revenge for their feet on her country's soil. Her country now dismembered and impoverished by the white men's greed, scattered and scared.

So why did Kimaris arrived in Hell? She doesn't talk that much, with this sweet voice of hers. Here in the arena they use to practice, she dances on the sand, showing precise moves, almost juggling with a spear which is twice her size.

_"Katrina?"_

She wonders what she looks like in broad daylight with her fire-red hair...

_"Katrina? Would you mind joining me for a moment? Take a break soldiers, we'll continue in five minutes."_

Katrina rises from her seat and observes the legion bow before their commander.

_"You seem worried my friend." _says Kimaris, staring at Katrina with her light chestnut eyes, _"is something bothering you?"._

Katrina crosses her arms in defense before noticing there is absolutely no sarcasm in Kimaris's voice. She's genuinely asking if she's well.

_"No... no I'm fine. I apologize for my behavior Kimaris..."_

Kimaris sits down and stares at her

_"Why were you imprisoned Katrina?"_

Katrina sits on the floor and answers, with a little voice

_"I rebelled against Lilith. She wanted me to provide her children for... "_

_"I know what for" _says Kimaris, still staring at her. _"Well I won't ask that of you if that's what's bothering you."_

Katrina rises and stutters

_"N...no... Kimaris I just wondered... who... who you were. I mean I heard things but you're so... different... than..."_

Kimaris smiled

_"I used to be an angel. I'm what they call a fallen angel. I was one of the first followers of Lucifer."_

Katrina's eyes widen with surprise. She's heard things, but certainly not those.

_"I failed at defending him when God locked him in the cage, and I was imprisoned since then."_

_"You remained in prison for so... long?"_

Kimaris smiles a little

_"Yes. Well I was never tortured. Just locked. I had many different jailers and they taught me many different things, like new languages. I doubt anyone speaks Sumerian anymore."_

_"Sumerian?"_

_"One of the first human languages... Coming straight from Enochian, the language of the angels"_

Katrina frowns

_"Humans were taught to talk by the angels?"_

Kimaris tilts her head

_"Humans were made for the angels."_

Her eyes are lost for a minute, as if she were remembering something

_"That too has been forgotten."_

* * *

Emerald City is absolutely beautiful, even more that what anyone could imagine, built under a gigantic green crystal castle. Since they've crossed the bridge, they've been treated very well by the "Ozians" as Kevin baptized them, who keep on calling Castiel "Brother", to his greatest confusion.

_"Should I tell them I'm not?" _said the angel.

_"Nope" _answered Saskia, _"You say nothing. You're like an big magical biometric passport. So just smile and nod Cas. Smile and nod._

After an hour walking, they finally reached the crystal castle, and as the sun is setting, it's sparkling like gem. Two guards, dressed in green uniforms come forward and stop them.

_"Good evening brother", _one tell Castiel, _"May I ask you why you're bringing this witch and this human to the temple?"_

Temple? thinks Saskia. That's odd.

Castiel coughs

_"We're here to see Dorothy and Charlie."_

The guard frowns

_"Their Graces don't receive today I'm afraid"_

Castiel turns to Saskia, not knowing what to say. She's a hunter, so she's a liar, just like Dean. She comes closer to the soldier and curtsies.

_"Forgive my friend's familiarity. We are here to request their Graces' help on the behalf of a common friend."_

The guard relaxes and smiles, asking

_"Very well, may I ask for this friend's name?"_

Saskia tells him Sam's name, and the guard disappears inside. After a few minutes, he comes back and informs them "Lady Charlie" is going to receive them in the courtroom.

The inside of the castle, or temple, is as beautiful as the outside. The light comes through the wall and creates multiples spots of color everywhere. It's too bad they have so little time, a visit would certainly be great. Kevin's mouth is open in shock and even Castiel looks surprised. The courtroom looks like the inside of a cathedral, and before they can all contemplate it, a feminine voice says, cheerfully,

_"Are you Sam's friends?"_

Saskia turns around and sees a red-haired woman walking towards them. He heart suddenly beats really fast From afar, she really looks like her mother, same height, same hair color, more or less the same age... But from up close she's completely different, smiling, outgoing.

_"You ok?"_

Saskia shakes her head, she must look like a scared rabbit. She breathes in and answers

_"Yes...yes thanks, just a little... startled I suppose."_

Charlie is wearing a long green dress, but her chest is protected with a refined engraved breastplate. She laughs

_"Yeah I was just like you when I arrived. I'm Charlie by the way, welcome to Emerald City."_

Saskia shakes her hand and says

_"I'm Saskia, this is Castiel and Kevin"_

Charlie seems super excited

_"The angel and the prophet! Of course! The guys told me about you, I'm so happy to meet you!"_

She hugs both of them, a very happy Kevin and a pretty embarrassed Castiel. She adds

_"So, what's bringing you here?"_

Saskia gives Charlie her phone, and she looks at Sam's video, explaining everything. When the video ends, Charlie sighs, visibly sad.

_"Gosh... haven't they been through enough already?"_

Castiel nods.

_"You understand why we need your help?"_

Charlie looks at him, her eyes shining with tears

_"I should have come back earlier it's just..."_

Kevin pats her shoulder

_"You couldn't know."_

She sniffs

_"I'm... I mean Dorothy and I we are..."_

Their Graces. Of course. Saskia completes

_"Together."_

Charlie smiles shyly

_"Yeah. We managed to bring peace back to the land and hum... in return Dorothy became the Lady of Oz... And me hers."_

She wipes her eyes

_"If you need to find Vivian, I can help you with that, follow me."_

The group follows Charlie to another room, if possible even more beautiful than the previous one. It's a circular room, with a huge green crystal in the middle of it. The crystal is sit in a pool of sparkling water, and all around are the most exotic looking plants you could ever see. Hummingbirds and butterflies are flying all around, and a hole in the ceiling lets the sunlight come in and light up the room.

Charlie lets Cas, Kevin and Saskia a moment before telling them where they are

_"This is the green crystal of Oz. There are 6 crystals in Avalon, connecting the 6 major cities. They have a lot of power, and one of them is you can use them to travel from castle to castle. The fairy you're looking for, the Lady of the Lake, is the Lady of Ys_. _Ys is another kingdom. Oz is green, Ys is blue, and its capital is called Sapphire City."_

Saskia walks towards the crystal, and she approaches her hand. She instantly feels a strong vibration, and hears a murmur, like thousand of voices. It's not only a traveling device, oh no. This thing is tremendously strong.

_"I don't know how to make it work, but Gilda does. She's a fairy friend, I can call her, and we'll asks Niahm, well Vivian, if she accepts to receive you."_

Castiel asks

_"Do you think she might refuse?"_

_"I don't think so no, Vivian is not very fond of humans, but she appreciated our help in the war against the dark witches so she'll help us."_

Charlie leaves them and goes find her friend.

Kevin notices Saskia has been very silent since they arrived, and he comes to her, touching her shoulder. Saskia jumps.

_"Sorry i didn't mean to scare you!" _says the prophet. Saskia turns around and she looks... anxious?

_"It's fine Kev." _she says, turning back to the crystal

_"What's wrong?" _he asks, not fooled by that almost winchester-esque way of answering.

_"I don't know yet." _Saskia answers, putting her hand on the crystal.

She can't quite grasp what the voice are telling, it's like a clamor, like hearing an entire world at the same time. And the power... she can feel it through her veins, it's like she's a battery on charge. How can't they feel it?

_"Cas?" _she asks, and Castiel comes closer.

_"Cas, do you feel something when you touch that crystal?"_

The angel puts his hand on the smooth surface, and at first, he doesn't feel anything. Then, a little tingling, and then... some kind of euphoria, though he's not sure. It's a feeling of pure happiness, it makes him want to laugh, and he never laughs. He begins to smile, and then to chuckle.

_"Cas?" _ says Kevin, worried. The angel's eyes are closed, and he's laughing. For nothing.

Castiel's laugh becomes louder, and soon it's out of control. Saskia and Kevin notice tears on the corner of his eyes, and suddenly, it stops. Castiel breathes, steps inside the pool, and takes some water in his hands. He splashes his face, and then starts to drink.

Kevin whispers

_"What the Hell..."_

Castiel is now knelt in the water, still drinking, and neither Saskia nor Kevin dare to interrupt him.

_"Thirsty brother?"_

Says a feminine voice. A woman is standing at the entrance, near Charlie who looks confused. It must be Gilda, and she walks towards them, getting inside the pool and gently leading Castiel out.

The angel is a little unsteady, and he sits down on a chair Charlie brought. When he finally opens his eyes, they're glowing a little.

_"Gilda..." _says Charlie, _"What happened to him?"_

Gilda doesn't seem to understand why everybody is so surprised.

_"His Light needed it, Charlie... you see me drinking water from the Sacred Pond all the time_. _Why are you so surprised?"_

Charlie frowns

_"He's not a fairy Gilda, he's an angel, from Earth."_

Gilda opens her eyes wide

_"An angel? I've heard of them but I'd never seen one!"_

Kevin crouches near Castiel who's still a little dazed, and Saskia uses her scarf to dry his face. Gilda walks towards the crystal, puts her hand on it and says

_"Lady Charlie and three guests in Emerald City are asking for passage to the Blue Castle"_

After a minute, a voice resonates in the room

_"Passage granted, welcome Lady Charlie."_

Charlie walks towards the crystal and tells the group to follow her. She touches the crystal and disappears.

_"You ok Cas?" _asks Saskia

The angel blinks several times. He feels well. He feels extremely well. And that's strange.

Usually, he never is.

_"I suppose so, yes"_

He says, rising from his chair.

Touching that crystal made him feel almost exactly the same than when his Grace was restored.

What can it possibly mean?


	18. Deal

The Blue Castle's Crystal Room is exactly the same than Oz's, except there are no plants. It looks like an ice palace, and Kevin can't repress a "are we in Frozen?" when he emerges from the portal. Saskia chuckles and whispers "then she must be Elsa", discretely pointing at a silver blond haired woman talking with Charlie and Gilda.

She's wearing a long pearl white dress, partly translucent and richly embroidered. She looks very young and eerily beautiful though her gaze shows she's way older than she seems. There is something very solemn about her, and Saskia feels quite impressed. Power is literally flowing from her body, and she looks like she could reduce you to nothing just by snapping her fingers. Charlie breaks the silence

"Niahm, may I introduce you to Saskia, Kevin and Castiel? They're the friends I was telling you about."

Charlie is smiling but Saskia sees she's a little stiff, certainly a little uneasy. The fairy walks towards the group and stares at them for a moment before saying

"Welcome to Ys. You can call me Vivian, if you know me by that name. Lady Charlie told me about your quest, please follow me upstairs, so we can talk."

She gracefully turns around and exits the room. Charlie asks

"Do you want me to stay with you guys? ", she smiles, "must say I'm curious about that Grail thing."

Saskia nods, she's Sam's friend so she doesn't see why she couldn't stay, and Kevin answers with an enthusiastic yes. Castiel seems lost. He's not really been himself since he drank that water.

"Cas?" asks Saskia

"Uh yes, yes of course" he answers, before walking out the room, following VIvian's steps.

On their way up, they're greeted by several fairies who lead them to Vivian's private garden, outside the Castle, on a large terrace. The view is extraordinary. The Castle is built on an island in the middle of a lake which waters are the bluest the group has ever seen. On the shore, you can see Sapphire City, a charming town made of tiny white houses, and its impressive harbor, where beautiful ships are waiting for travelers.

Vivian is sit on a white engraved armchair, and is drinking a glass of what seems to be water. Fairies bring more chairs, and the group awkwardly sits. In this environment of beauty and elegance, they feel completely out of place.

"So, you are looking for the Grail, aren't you?"

Castiel nods and says

"Yes, we are, and your help would be very appreciated."

Vivian stares at him

"You're an angel, are you?"

Before Cas can say anything, she turns to Saskia and says

"And you're a witch."

Saskia swallows and sees Kevin getting tense.

"You... are marked. Marked by him."

Kevin stutters

"H...him?"

Vivian precises

"God, as you might call him. Though I know him under another name."

Castiel asks

"What other name?"

Vivan sips a little water and answers

"An."

Before putting her glass back on the table and staring at the group with an half amused look.

"If you're looking for the Grail, and if you came here, then you certainly have some suspicions about your god's true nature, haven't you?"

Saskia hesitates and says

"We... have. We have evidence proving that God is a... warlock, or at least has a very good knowledge of magic, especially dark magic."

Vivian nods, interested. Saskia continues

"Some people here speak angelic, well Enochian, to be precise."

She stops, unsettled by the fairy's ice blue eyes. Vivian smiles a little and says

"So now you're wondering if...?"

Kevin completes

"If God is... a ... fairy...", he grimaces, "though it sounds completely uh... don't mean to be offensive but hum..."

Castiel finally talks

"My home is collapsing. My brothers and sisters are dying because an angel triggered something with a spell God designed. We need, our world needs to find him so he can restore Heaven and the world's balance."

He gets up, clenching his fists

"I want to know who he is, who I am, and trust me, I have a thousand questions to ask. But right now, I just need to find him. I just need to save Heaven."

The fairy's arrogance turned him right back into Heaven's little soldier, even though a few hours ago he couldn't care less. There is just something so... contemptuous in this woman's eyes when she talks about God. He can't stand it despite God's betrayal, the memory loss and the lies.

Vivian raises an eyebrow

"Sit down Angel, I said I would help you, didn't I?"

Saskia looks at Castiel and coughs, trying to show him he needs to cooperate, and Cas sits back on his chair, reluctantly. Vivian looks at him, with a mischievous smile and she says

"Before I begin to tell you about the Grail, you must know that I am not a friend of your god. Quite the contrary actually."

She turns to Kevin and adds

"But you were right, God, An comes from this place. And he was born a warlock."

Castiel stutters

"You...you knew him?"

Vivian drinks a little water and answers

"I did. I used to know him and his sister, Tiamat."

Saskia is confused.

"God has a... sister?"

"He does, well he did." says Vivian, "Maybe you know her under another name. Tiamat was a witch, and a very talented alchemist. She used to create homunculi and well... what you would call monsters."

Castiel whispers

"Eve..."

Vivian tilts her head, and adds

"Yes. That's it. Eve."

She gets up and starts to walk around the terrace

"You used the Green Castle's Crystal to come here. Do you know what's the use of the six Crystals of Avalon?"

Kevin answers

"Charlie told us they were connecting the six major cities."

Vivian smiles to the Prophet.

"They do. But they are much more than this as well. Those Crystals contain the souls of generations of faes, they're directly connected to our world's Life Stream."

Saskia mutters

"Of course... the voices..."

Vivian turns to her

"You heard them, you're a witch, I'm not surprised.", she continues, "over the generations, hundreds of very old and very wise faes chose to merge with the Crystals in their time of dying, so that their knowledge and power would never be lost. Anyone who can connect with a Crystal can harvest its knowledge, and become wiser"

Kevin adds

"It's like a... noosphere?"

The fairy nods

"Exactly. The Crystal are the pillars on which our world is built. They are also the source of the Faes' Light."

Saskia says

"The Sacred Pond..."

"Yes. As you have noticed, this is no ordinary water."

Saskia completes

"We use water to clean the crystals but those don't need to so hum... the water... takes some of the crystal's properties and when you drink it..."

She stops, amazed.

"That's the source of your power?"

Vivian smiles

"Yes. Now, what if I told you there used to be seven Crystals in Avalon?"

Castiel frowns. This definitely doesn't look good. The fairy continues

"I am the Lady of Ys, as you know. Well, An and TIamat used to be the rulers of another land, named..."

Castiel interrupts her

"Eden."

Vivian looks at him and says

"Eden."

After what happened in that town he really wants to forget, Logan has grown warier of Andras, who's still trying to be his friend, in a very Andras's way, meaning, let's bond over torturing people.

Andras is old, even if he doesn't precisely know how old, but he acts like a psycho child. There are moments when he practically looks normal, and Logan wonders what he meant when he said he used to be like him. What could he possibly mean? Like what?

He's showing his legions how to torture people, and frankly, Logan can barely stand the sight of him slicing people and laughing like a... well a demon. Logan has the black eyes, he has the hate and the violence. He also has the sadism but hell... this is a whole new level of evil. He died in 2002, so he remained 12 years in Hell, in Earth time. It felt like a century though. A century being tortured and burnt alive, being obliged to witness over and over things he wanted to forget so he could, just a few weeks ago, wake up one day screaming his hate for the world, humanity, his father and of course Saskia Jager.

Seemed simple then. His thirst for revenge was so strong. But seeing Andras is like a cold shower. It made him think about Kay... well Saskia, she hated that nickname. About how he treated her. And now he's looking at Andras dismembering someone and explaining people are "just like chickens, you just need to know where to cut", he wonders if they are indeed the same. Because there were moments in his life when he definitely enjoyed tormenting her. And others when he felt just like blowing his head off for being such a waste of flesh and blood. He just was never brave enough.

"You want to cut him?"

Andras came to sit beside him. His blond hair is stuck on his forehead with blood, and basically, he's covered in it. He's smiling, observing the group he's training cutting a poor guy like a Thanksgiving turkey.

Logan mutters

"No thanks."

Andras sighs

"You're absolutely not funny at all. I'm disappointed. And bored."

Logan looks at him. Nothing good comes from him being bored.

"Tell me uh... Andras. How did you... land here?"

The blond boy crosses his legs and turns to him, smiling

"You sure you want to know?"

Uh oh.

"Because that's a long story. But I'm sure you can relate."

Andras said, winking. Oh yeah that's true, somehow he knows his story, how he does is another question. Logan nods and Andras says

"My father sold me to Agares."

Logan shouts

"What?"

Andras fakes a sad face

"Don't be like that, it was what? more than 600 years ago? I'm over it."

Logan asks

"But why?"

Andras sighs

"Ever heard about the Black Plague? Well everyone was dying around us. I was born in Venice and my father was a merchant. Quite wealthy, wishing to get wealthier..."

Logan stares at him and notices his gaze has changed. It looks almost nostalgic, and has lost its madness.

"Anyway my mother got sick and died, and so did my two older brothers. For an unknown reason, my father and I were spared."

He makes his wicked smile again

"Which was strange because I had always been a sick child. I guess my father thought I would be the first to die but no, it was his beloved wife, and then his beloved first born Giacomo."

Logan asks

"What's you real name?"

Andras stares at him for a moment, expressionless and then he rolls his eyes, smiles and says

"Andrea"

He begins to clean his knife with his thumb and lick the blood, just like he did in the woods, and Logan feels like his life story makes him even more unstable. But he can't interrupt him. Not right now.

"So, as all his colleagues were also dying he thought this disease could be an opportunity you know, to get richer. I anyone survived of course. But he wasn't the kind to sell his own valuables, so he summoned a demon and made a deal. His last son's soul for his own survival."

Logan shakes his head and Andras says

"Don't tell me your father wouldn't have sold you to save your mother?"

The hunter tries not to look shocked. Is that why Andras tried to get close to him? Because he thinks he can relate? Though he's not completely wrong. Logan doesn't know how many times Rick told him he wished his mother terminated her pregnancy just like he asked her to. He mutters

"Yeah, maybe he would have."

Andras makes a satisfied smile

"Well mine wanted to survive and Agares went to take me."

He licks a drop of blood

"Best thing that ever happened to me"

Logan says

"Really?"

And instantly regrets it. Andras doesn't seem to care though.

"He tortured me to the point I... didn't even know who I was", he says, with an ecstatic smile. "In the end, it didn't even hurt. I was... expecting it, anticipating it... The feeling of..."

He starts to cut his arm and stares intensely at his own blood

"I can't really describe it. It's the strongest kind of..."

He cuts again and Logan has a hard time not telling him to stop

"Love... I've ever received"

Holy shit. Logan doesn't want to know the extent of the torture, or the details. Yes please, no details.

"He made me his equal."

He says, softly, almost whispering.

"And when I was ready he let me pay my father a little visit."

He adds, with a sadistic smile, his mouth reddened by traces of his own blood. Logan looks at him and tries to smile, but only imagining what Andras did to his father makes him shiver.

"If you could pay a visit to the one who sent you here, what would you do?"

Andras asks him, with a little half smile. If he could see Kay again? He doesn't know. He would be torn between slicing her in little pieces and apologizing for having been such a heartless dick.

She probably wouldn't listen though. She would look at him with her amber eyes and send him right back where he comes from.

Where she should also be, if the world was fair.

"You'll burn her? You'll take her? You'll cut her?"

Andras seems pretty excited

"Do you want me to find her for you?"

Oh fuck.

"Maybe that would do you good you know. Peal the bitch's skin off. Grill it. And eat it."

He's laughing now and Logan isn't sure he managed to hide his disgust.

"Or whatever you want, fuck her, I don't know. With my darling father I..."

"Andras stop!"

He says, and the demon grins

"I'll find her for you. You'll thank me later."

He gracefully jumps back in the arena and congratulates his team for its torturing skills.

Logan is confused. The first thing he thought was "I hope Kay reduces you to ashes."

He's never hoped anything about Saskia, except for her to die soon.

Rudi's log cabin is far from being the typical hunter hideout. It's warm, comfortable, and filled with magic books. It definitely feels good to finally be out of the bunker, to be at last able to breathe fresh air and to see other people. Linda took advantage of their trip to go back to her house settle some personal business and take some more clothes and things for her and Kevin, she should be there in a couple of days. There was no need for her to remain alone in the bunker. When her son comes back from Fairy Land, Saskia will call Rudi and thanks to her portal they will all be able to come back in a minute.

It was Rudi's idea to come here to train, here where he has all his important books, and where no demon or angel or anything can approach.

Speaking of the devil, the older man comes back from his kitchen with two steaming cups of coffee and a few cookies.

"Comfy?" he says, smiling. Sam answers

"Yeah. Really. Thanks."

Rudi puts the cups on the table and sits beside Sam.

"So, about the trap for your brother..." he begins

Sam turns to him, interested and says

"Yeah?"

Rudi frowns

"Here's my problem. I studied everything I had, plus what you told me about Cain and I designed a perfect trap and a way to maybe cure your brother."

Sam has trouble containing his excitement, this man is amazing.

"So what's the problem?"

Rudi sighs

"Well. I told you your power could help me trapping your brother, you remember?"

Sam nods

"Ok so I thought about drawing the trap with your blood. For two reasons, in blood magic, family blood is powerful, and you're the closest parent he has. Plus your blood is special, due to your ability."

Rudi drinks some coffee and continues.

"You also told me human blood could cure a demon, right? So I figured we could also use your blood to cure your brother, but then we would have a problem with the Mark."

Sam agrees, they already thought about it with Saskia and that's why they concluded they couldn't cure him yet.

"Thing is, I've been thinking about what you said you know? About that uh... Colette? Is that it? How she managed to help Cain controlling the Mark?"

Sam feels a little uneasy. If he's honest to himself, he's thought about it a few times as well.

"Love is a powerful thing. You see, if I'm being pragmatic, I agree with Saskia, we can't only count on God. So I was wondering, is there someone, anyone, we could ask for help? Someone your brother used to love?"

Sam coughs and Rudi continues, not noticing his unease.

"She wouldn't have to come, I just need some blood. Blood of the Lover, that's a common thing in Blood Magic, I'll show you but uh... That way we could cure him with your blood and stabilize him with hers."

Sam scratches his scalp.

"That would be perfect. And my problem is, we don't have anyone that matches the description, do we?"

Rudi's looking at Sam, and the hunter's first instinct is to mention Lisa, the woman Dean spent a year with. But it's fooling them both. Dean loved Lisa, but was never in love with her, not the way he's in love with... well with him. Even if they went through all the trouble of locating her and take some of her blood it wouldn't work. He tries

"The person you're thinking about... does she have to be uh... a lover, I mean a partner? Or does it work with any kind of love?"

Rudi frowns and takes a minute to think before answering

"Well... Ideally, we'd need his soul mate, that's the strongest kind of bond. Why, you were thinking of someone?"

Sam deeply breathes in. If there is a moment to be brave about who he is, about who they are, it's now.

"With my uh... ability... Is there a way I can show you something?"

Rudi nods and explains him how to connect both their fourth shakra. This way Sam can extract his feelings and make them pass through Rudi's mind.

"Don't be afraid to push a little though"

The warlock wonders what is that thing Sam wants to show him, that thing he seems not to be able to voice.

Sam closes his eyes and takes Rudi's hands. After a few minutes of concentration, he opens them again, and now he can see all the colors surrounding them. As Rudi told him, he thinks about what he wants to show, and he visualizes Dean. He knows he can't hit Rudi with all his memories of Dean, there are too many of them and it could knock him out. He needs to show him what he feels for him, just that. Let the memories aside and focus on the feeling. Waking up close to him. His stupid jokes. His freckles. How he cries. Just a single tear. Because John used to forbid him to cry. His happy smile. His casual way of saying "I'd die for you". The fear of loosing him. The impossibility of leaving him. Love. Need. Ache. Happiness. Dean.

He sees a light green orb emerging from his heart and flying to Rudi's. It's levitating right in front of it, and Sam remembers he told him to insist. So he does, and Rudi jerks, shaken by the intrusion, trying to get some air, gasping. Sam doesn't let go of his hands and stares at him. Tears are filling the warlock's eyes and he shoves Sam's hands away, getting up and walking to the house's open door, heavily breathing.

"I'm sorry' says Sam, still sit on the couch.

Rudi doesn't answer and Sam knows something is now certainly broken between them.

"I couldn't... keep on... hiding it... Especially if I can save him."

The warlock is still scarily silent and Sam gets up, awkwardly walking towards him.

"I love him. I... I know how it sounds... I won't blame you if you..."

Rudi starts laughing. That, Sam didn't expect. He sadly mutters

"Okay..."

And turns around. Rudi catches his wrist and says

"You almost broke my seal with that love of yours"

Sam looks at him, puzzled.

"I was laughing because you're an idiot. You mean well. But you're an idiot."

The hunter is now very confused and Rudi precises

"How many times did I tell you I didn't care about what you had done, or what your brother had done? "

Sam says

"Yeah I know but this..."

Rudi rolls his eyes

"This what? Have you heard what I've just said? You. Almost. Broke. My. Seal."

Sam doesn't seem to understand, and Rudi pushes him playfully

"It means, you big imbecile, it means what you sent was so powerful that it almost broke a coven seal. A coven seal on the shakra which controls feelings."

Sam doesn't react and Rudi gets back inside, laughing again

"God Sam I don't care you love your brother or the mailman I mean... This is the strongest kind of love I've ever witnessed! How can you be ashamed by that?"

The hunter finally manages to talk

"He's my brother."

Rudi looks at him and replies

"Has he always been?"

Sam is puzzled

"How would I know?"

The warlock answers

"You wouldn't. But I don't see the point of waiting for another life, when your brother won't be your brother, for claiming a soul that is clearly yours."

Sam sits down, shocked.

"It doesn't bother you?"

Rudi sits beside him and makes his mischievous grin.

"Haven't I told you I wasn't one of those so called 'good people'?"

"You mean... Heaven is a part of this world? I don't..."

Castiel is pacing around the terrace, looking distraught and Vivian sighs.

"No angel, no, that's not what I said."

The group is now in complete confusion, and Vivian looks at them the way you would look at a not very bright toddler.

"An and Tiamat were the rulers of a kingdom called Eden. Here, in Avalon. But because of Tiamat's experiments and An's hunger for power, they were threatened of being stripped of their titles by Oberon, our King."

Castiel stops walking and looks at Vivian, who's staring at him with pity.

"They stole Eden's crystal to cross worlds and establish themselves on Earth. They stole the seventh crystal."

The angel mutters

"What?"

Vivian gets up and walks close to him.

"You were born from this crystal, and so were all your brothers and sisters."

Castiel looks at her, lost, and says

"That's why... people here were... calling me brother?"

Vivan takes his hand

"Yes, that is why."

She turns to the rest of the group

"Because of An and Tiamat's theft, our world has been unstable since the seventh crystal was brought to your world."

She sits on her chair and closes her eyes

"It caused your world a lot of trouble as well, more than you could ever imagine."

Saskia swallows with difficulty. She was expecting something surprising but not that much.

"My interest, as the Lady of Ys, and as a member of Avalon's Great Council is to see An brought to Oberon's justice."

She continues

"If you swear to respect that, I will help you"

Castiel sits in front of her, and says, without consulting the others

"We have a deal."

God is just like his favorite sons.

A dick with wings.


	19. Light Bringer

"_They want to free Michael._"

Hannah is sit in Castiel's office and Gadriel has just crashed in an armchair, heavily sighing

"_God... Will they ever learn?_"

Hannah shakes her head, looking depressed

_"I'm starting to understand why Castiel didn't want any responsibility."_

She bites her lip, juggling with a pen

_"You know what they said?"_

Gadriel says

_"I guess they told you they needed a real, tough, manly and merciless leader?"_

Hannah looks at him and his surprised to hear sarcasm in his mouth. He's right though.

_"They said almost exactly that. They said Michael will know how to restore Heaven, how to make the Reapers work again, how to give us back our power... Basically they think he's..."_

_"Let me guess, God Almighty?"_

Hannah rolls her eyes

_"Yes. And I told them Castiel was trying to find God, but they're convinced it would please him to have Michael back."_

Gadriel frowns

_"Did they say something about Lucifer?"_

_"They swore it wasn't about him but uh... I don't trust them. Anyway, I managed to convince them to wait for Castiel's return before going to battle, so I guess it gives us time."_

Gadriel nods and adds

_"How long can they wait?"_

_"Not long. Two angels died today. Their Graces burnt out."_

Hannah gets up and starts walking around the room.

_"They're the first to... die like this. We don't have much time Gadriel..."_

Gadriel rises too and walks close to her

_"I know. But going to war won't solve anything. What about your friends in Naomi's archives? Did they find anything?"  
_

Hannah sits on her chair and looks even more desperate

_"I have a meeting scheduled with them this afternoon. They don't seem very... optimistic... to say the least. You're welcome to accompany me if you want."  
_

Gadriel shrugs and replies

_"I would love to, but apparently the access to the Garden is still locked and I have been asked to take care of it."_

Hannah smiles sadly

_"Is there anything working here?"_

_"I guess not" _

Answers Gadriel, leaving the office. It's not like he can do anything about the Garden, but angels have to see he's trying to help, that they're not alone.

If this fight with Hell does happen, in their current state they're going to be wiped out.

Gadriel hopes Cas knows what he's doing.

_"Are you sure you do not want to think about it angel?" _ asks Vivian.

Castiel looks at Saskia and Kevin and notices they seem startled. He did accept a deal out of anger. He mutters

_"The Tablets..."_

And Kevin gets them out of his backpack. Vivian looks at them, visibly interested, and the Prophet explains

_"These are God's... I translated two of them and hum they're... encrypted. We kind of hoped you could maybe..."_

Vivian smiles

_"Read them for you?"_

She brushes her fingers on the tablets surface, and suddenly the artifacts are glowing with a blue light. The fairy adds

_"It's nothing that I don't know already" _with nostalgia in her voice.

She keeps on looking at them in silence until she says

_"The content of these tablets will be very shocking, I prefer to warn you."_

Castiel nods, and Saskia and Kevin look at each other, bracing themselves. Vivian breathes in and begins to explain the Tablets content.

When An and Tiamat crossed worlds to get to Earth, they used Eden's crystal to lock all the doors from Avalon to their new home, so no one would follow them. As they couldn't live on Earth with their Fae bodies, they created a Earth-bound dimension, Heaven, where they could live.

_"Heaven was created with Eden's crystal. The stone must be at the center of it." _says Vivian, and Castiel whispers

_"The Garden of Eden..."_

The fairy nods

_"Exactly. Have you ever been there?"_

Castiel frowns

_"Yes, a few times. But I've never seen any crystal."_

Vivian replies

_"That's because of how Heaven was designed. Everything depends on the eyes of the beholder. If you don't know what to look for, you won't see it."_

Saskia says to Kevin

_"It's like in the Never Ending Story..."_

And the Prophet nods. It's actually quite an interesting comparison. Obviously, Heaven lacks some kind of energy, but what kind?

Vivian continues to tell God's story. Once Heaven was created, An and Tiamat decided to erase the domineering specie on Earth so they could create an ideal environment for their own creatures.

_"In those days, Earth was populated with giant reptiles."_

She turns to Saskia

_"Are you familiar with the art of invocation?"_

The witch nods, and Vivian adds

_"What do you know about the invocation called Meteor_?"

Saskia's eyes widen in shock, and Kevin grabs her wrist, asking her to explain. Saskia mutters

_"Invocations are... very hard to master uh... Basically it's about binding a creature... or any form of energy... to you..."_

She sips a little water.

_"It's dark, very dark... Meteor is about... summoning a meteor to crash on something, or someone... It's legendary... I didn't even know..."_

Kevin says

_"You're saying God invoked a meteor to destroy the dinosaurs?"_

Vivianprecises

_"You are almost right. Almost. Meteor is not about invoking a stone, it's about invoking Death."_

Castiel shouts

_"What?"_

Vivian explains

_"One of the first actions of An as Earth's God was to bind Death to him. And he used him many times to destroy what he didn't like. Meteor, fire, floods... It must sound familiar to you."_

Saskia asks

_"But why?"_

Vivian answers

_"Simple reason, he needed energy to keep his Heaven running. And this energy, he took it from Earth's Life Stream."_

Castiel suddenly understands

_"The souls..."_

And the fairy smiles, conniving. Kevin asks for precisions, and Castiel answers

_"The souls are Heaven's source of energy... which means... they were not originally made to go to Heaven..."_

Vivian says

_"No. And that's why An needed to control Death. Who controls Death controls the Life Stream."_

And Castiel nods, visibly troubled. Vivian continues.

_"Whatever spell this Metatron used certainly freed Death, and the human souls are going back to the Life Stream, thus taking away your... Heaven's source of energy."_

The angels says

_"I heard no such thing..."_

And wonders if Hannah knows about this. She said she had trouble withe Reapers, but she didn't mention to what extent, and he was too angry to ask. He's been irresponsible. He asks

_"How can we save Heaven if we don't have that... energy?"_

Vivian raises an eyebrow

_"I do not know angel. But you said your brothers and sisters were losing their Light, their... Graces, am I right?"_

Castiel confirms

_"The Crystal might be trying to restore itself by taking this energy back. After all, if An gave you your light back, he might still have some kind of control over Eden's Crystal."_

Castiel thinks about Joshua, God's gardener, supposedly the one and only angel God communicates with. Is he actually the guardian of the Crystal? Where is he now? Was he also expelled from Heaven after Metatron's spell?

Before he can say anything, Saskia says

_"So it means the spell was designed to... reboot everything? Turn Earth back into what it used to be?"_

Vivian nods

_"It is possible. But that Metatron was not strong enough to do it properly. I suppose that if An's Light had been used, all the angels would have been instantly killed, and their Lights gathered into the crystal."_

Castiel looks traumatized.

_"So instead, we are just dying a slow death."_

Vivian reaches his hand and whispers

_"I am truly sorry."_

Kevin whispers

_"So the spell to close the gates of Hell, the one Sam wanted to use... Was it to... kill all the demons?"_

Vivian answers

_"If such a spell was made by An, well certainly. After all, he is the one who created Heaven, Hell and Purgatory. It is only natural he knows how to destroy them. Maybe he always knew his plan to colonize a new world was never going to work."_

She pauses

_"As I told you earlier, An used Eden's Crystal to create the angels, the Annunakis as the first humans used to call them, meaning An's creatures."_

All the angels were created at that moment, when the Earth was still recovering from the Meteor's Blast. And soon, An decided he and his children needed to colonize the Earth. But for that, they needed vessels. That's when Tiamat went to work. She asked for her own home, since Heaven was now filled with angels, and that's how Purgatory was created, though then it wasn't a prison, simply Tiamat's Heaven. She wanted to have the most intelligent and powerful vessel possible, and using all her knowledge, she created the Leviathans.

_"Leviathans were made to be vessels?" _asks Castiel, disgusted.

Vivian confirms. Soon enough, the Leviathans proved to be way too dangerous, since Tiamat had created them trans-dimensional. This started a feud between An and his sisters, since she refused to change anything in her creatures, and even decided they deserved to have a life of their own. She began to fill the Earth with different other monsters, and after some time, An used his power to lock Tiamat and the Leviathans in Purgatory, turning it into a dimension where monsters would kill each other for eternity.

_"Their souls were too corrupted to return to the Life Stream, and too dangerous to be allowed in Heaven. Purgatory works in a loop, and it's one of the most terrible place An could ever create. This was maybe the moment when he realized his plans could lead Earth to catastrophe."_

Castiel remembers his time in this dreadful forest. And when he freed the Leviathans like the fool he was when he wanted to sit in God's throne. If only he had known then...

_"After that, God started to work on another kind of vessels for his angels, and that's how humans were created."_

Saskia says

_"Just to be... meatsuits?"_

Vivian answers

_"I would not use that word but yes. For what I know, originally humans were created to serve as vessels for the angels."_

She pauses, reading a tablet again.

_"What happened after is not written, and I'm afraid I ignore it as well."_

Castiel frowns, and Vivian completes

_"In the beginning, An used Eden's Crystal to lock Earth from the inside. No one could cross from our side. And when we were finally able to..."_

Vivian explains the access to Earth was reopen very suddenly, without any warning. Faes quickly went through and found a few herds of starved and lost humans, who told them tales about a terrible war.

_"It wasn't very clear. When we were finally able to cross, several generations had passed and their memories had merged with legends and superstitions. What we gathered was that a terrible cataclysm had happened. They talked about fire in the sky, about a Flood, about... cities turned to sand, an entire continent turned to ice..."_

Saskia and Kevin look at each other, stunned, and Charlie opens her mouth for the first time since they started talking, muttering

_"Atlantis..."_

Vivian doesn't pay attention and continues

_"Our goal at that time was already to find An and retrieve Eden's Crystal. But he had disappeared. And the few angels we met were unable to tell us what had happened. They all said the same thing, and it couldn't be the truth. That's how we understood what had happened."_

She takes another tablet

_"It's written right here. God sacrificed his light to erase his creatures memories, and he disappeared on Earth."_

Castiel shakes his hand

_"Does it say how to find him?"_

Vivian smiles

_"No. It only says God chose to live among the poor. If he's always kept his control over Eden's crystal, restoring his Light while hiding was a good plan for someone who wanted to abandon his responsibilities."_

Kevin whispers

_"Among the humans..."_

The fairy replies

_"Yes. It means God incarnates in his prophets."_

Staring at him. Kevin rises and starts to walk around

_"No. No, no, no, no."_

Castiel says

_"That's why every angel knows the names of the future prophets..."_

Vivian confirms

_"Yes. God, An, has been hiding in his vessels since those wars. And since then, we've been tracking him."_

Saskia interrupts

_"But if he incarnates in his prophets... how did you miss him?"_

The fairy explains

_"Most of the time, he hides inside his prophet, he doesn't take full control, or maybe for a very short time. He works as an... inspiration. He pushed his Prophets to do things for him, but he lays low. That's why he's so difficult to find."_

Saskia nods, and Vivian continues

_"Myrrdin and I...", _she smiles, _"you must know him under the name of Merlin; we managed to forge two objects to locate him and..."_

She looks at the group, seeming a little embarrassed.

_"And kill him."_

Castiel shouts

_"You wanted to kill God?"_

And Vivian gets up, staring coldly at the angel.

_"Yes. Or incapacitate him."_

She turns back to the other and explains that Myrrdin is actually a wizard of Avalon, one of the most talented in Oberon's court. After a few missed attempts at locating God, Myrrdin forged a medallion to locate An.

_"It represents Oberon, the Horned God."_

Saskia asks

_"Cernunnos?"_

The fairy answers

_"To the Celts, yes. From the moment we were able to cross worlds again, we took care of An's abandoned creatures. After all, you all have a little of our light in you. Oberon himself came a few times, and he was quickly worshiped. Horns symbolize strength and power, and depending on people's culture, the horned god could have deer antlers or... bull horns, like Mithra, one of Oberon's many earthling names."_

Castiel stutters

_"Was it a... golden amulet... with the face of a... closed-eyed man... with bull horns?"_

Vivian raises an eyebrow

_"You heard of it?"_

Castiel doesn't feel like saying he lost it.

_"Yes. I was told it burnt hot in God's presence, but that it didn't work if he... didn't want to be found."_

Vivian looks at him for a minute, and it's clear she guessed he knows more. But she still pretends she didn't and says

_"An cannot be found by fairies or angels, that was a part of the spell he used. This amulet was made to be used by humans, pure blooded humans."_

Kevin is still walking around, and he snaps at everyone

_"I might have had God inside of my body and nobody has anything to say about that?"_

Saskia gets up and pats his shoulder, apologizing, and the Prophet says

_"Sorry but how is this thing supposed to work? We wear it and then one, we go door to door until it finally burns hot?"_

Vivian shakes her head

_"No. It works like a pendulum and it gives visions to the one who wears it."_

Saskia says

_"I know how to use that. What's the second object, the one to kill?"_

The fairy says

_"It's a spear. We used it once, but too late. An had already left his vessel."_

Charlie mutters

_"Don't tell me you stabbed Jesus..."_

Vivian raises an eyebrow and then confirms. Jesus was one of An's prophets, and he was also one of the few An completely possessed.

_"It was the first time we used the amulet and we found him quite easily. Unfortunately for us, when we reached him on the cross, it's the human we stabbed, An had flown away."_

Saskia says

_"That's why he was saying... uh... Father why did you left me? Or something like that?"_

Vivian nods

_"Yes."_

_"Fairies stabbed Jesus" _repeats Charlie.

Vivian explains that after Jesus's death, she decided to stop tracking An and went back to Ys, leaving the artifacts on Earth. That chase had last for centuries, and it had made her neglect her own land.

_"But you did come back to Earth" _says Kevin, _"You helped King Arthur."_

The fairy sighs

_"I am afraid my influence has been wildly exaggerated. I was called there by Myrrdin, we had lost contact since Jesus, and I learnt he had adopted a little boy he wanted to use to find God. He gave him the spear, reshaped in a sword Arthur called Excalibur, and the amulet, and used him to create a little army dedicated to find the "Grail". Arthur used the amulet's visions to send his knights on missions, and many of them got killed in the process."_

Castiel asks

_"Killed by God?"_

"_Yes. I suppose we were getting close. Anyway, only one knight managed to approach An, and he came back mad. He killed himself. After that, I told Myrrdin we had to stop looking for An. That he was too dangerous, but he refused. He said he had swore an oath to Oberon, and that he intended to keep it."_

Kevin says

_"So you locked him in your castle...?"_

_"No, I ordered him, as his lady, to go back to Avalon and to never cross to Earth again. We came back together, and I left the artifacts on Earth. Arthur was certainly buried with them."_

Saskia asks

_"You didn't take him here with you?"_

Vivian shakes her head

_"No. And after that, An's worshipers began to chase, kill and persecute those who believed in us. Trying to arrest An got many fairies and humans killed by angels."_

She drinks another glass of water, looking lost in her thoughts.

_"An is not the benevolent being you think he is. He is resentful, and he won't let himself be caught easily. Many humans died because of our quest. We were able to save a few that we brought here, but a lot were murdered. Druids, witches, wise men and women..."_

She sighs.

_"I suppose he wanted to abandon his responsibilities after that terrible war. But getting arrested and brought to justice was never part of his plan."_

She turns to Castiel

_"You know the name of all the potential prophets. You just need to go and see them with the one who will bear the amulet."_

The angels says, embarrassed,

_"The problem is... there are no more Prophets."_

And he explains to Vivian the effects of Metatron's spell. The fairy takes a moment to think and says

_"So he's hiding in one of those who are still alive. He's not in this one" _she says, pointing at Kevin, _"I would have felt it."_

Castiel sits and thinks about... Chuck. Chuck Surley. The one who wrote the Winchesters Gospel. The one who disappeared after... of course. Before he can say anything Vivian says

_"As for the destruction of your home angel... I am afraid it cannot be avoided. Eden's Crystal belongs in Eden, belongs here. And the Human Souls belong in Earth's Life Stream."_

The angel shakes his head.

_"So we're just... going to die?"_

The fairy smiles

_"I have never said that. A new home can be built, an new source of energy can be found."  
_

Castiel frowns

_"If you find An, if you give him to me, I will do everything in my power to save your brothers and sisters. I would never let fellow faes die like this."_

The angel mutters

_"Thank you."_

Vivian adds

_"As a proof of my good will, I will give you some water from our Sacred Pond, enough to temporarily heal your people._"

Castiel lightens up a bit and says, with more conviction

_"Thank you, I am grateful for your help."_

Saskia asks

_"How do we uh... find the artifacts you talked about?"_

Vivian answers

_"Myrrdin designed spells to summon them, I will give them to you."_

Saskia thanks her, and Vivian rises from her chair, gracefully walking back into her castle. A fairy guard approaches and proposes the group to guide them back to the Crystal Room.

Everybody is pretty shaken up, and the walk is heavily silent. Saskia has put her arm around Kevin's shoulders, gently stroking his arm. The expression on his face when he heard he might have had another being inside him without his knowledge or consent brought back painful memories, and she doesn't know if she's comforting him or herself.

They wait in the Crystal Room for long minutes before Vivian comes back carrying a beautiful engraved crystal amphora.

_"This amphora was built from a piece of our Crystal."_

Castiel carefully takes it and Vivian adds

_"The water it will produce will not be as strong as the one you can drink here. But it will be enough to quench your people's thirst until you find An."_

The angel nods and the Fairy says, smiling

_"In the meantime, I will inform our King and our Council, and try to find a solution for your brothers and sisters."_

Castiel shyly approaches Vivian and awkwardly bows, saying

_"In the name of Heaven, thank you Lady Vivian"_

Vivian nods and turns to the rest of the group

_"I can send you back home, if you wish to go back now." _

Saskia nods, and so does Kevin. Charlie mutters

_"Do you think... Do you think I could be of some use?"_

She looks lost, and Saskia answers

_"Well of course. Sam told us you were brilliant"_

Charlie smiles

_"You're very welcome to accompany us Charlie."_

Adds Castiel. Charlie enthusiastically nods and agrees to join them after she explained the situation to Dorothy. She waves goodbye to the group as they cross to the other side, and promises herself she will soon be there to help the Winchester Brothers.

Earth is her home, after all.

_"Eli, Anael, this is Gadriel"_

Gadriel looks at the two angels in front of him, and it's clear they're exhausted, and also something else. Desperate. The man, Eli, approaches and takes Hannah's hand

_"Sister... I am very sorry to tell you that... I don't even know... "_

Hannah shakes her head and says, softly

_"Fear not, my friend, what have you found?"_

The angels claps his hands, and a gigantic library appears. Anael, the other angel, a woman with long black hair explains

_"All our memories are... stored... here"_

And she points at the endless accumulation of shelves. But there are no books, only stones, crystals, shaped in the form of little pyramids. Anael walks to Gadriel and shows him one

_"This is... yours. Gadriel."_

His name is engraved on it, and Gadriel carefully holds it. Eli says

_"Do you want to see what's inside?"_

Gadriel nods, a little confused, and Anael gently takes the little pyramid and put it on a white pedestal in front of her. Some kind of translucent screen appears, and after a second, Gadriel sees someone in it, a man, standing close to an olive tree.

_"He's dying, Gadriel." _says the man, _"He's dying, and you know what to do to save him, to save them."_

Gadriel is shocked, he doesn't remember any of that. He hears a voice, certainly his, answering

_"I know. But I have orders. They have to find by themselves, I cannot help them, we cannot help them."_

The man walks closer, seemingly angry.

_"This is a crime Gadriel. You don't have to respect those rules. First they were made to be ours. Then they're supposed to survive like animals? Let us in, brother_. _Let us take them out of this place and save them."_

The voice answers

_"You're asking me to rebel, Enki."_

Hannah and Gadriel frown. Who is that?

_"I know brother, I know. But in you heart you know this is justice. You live inside your true vessel, you know what it feels like. You know where you belong. Right here. With them."_

That Enki has surprisingly kind eyes.

_"I will not go back to Heaven Gadriel. I will stay here, and build our new home here."_

The voice whispers

_"This is treason."_

And Enki answers

_"No, my friend, this is justice. Justice for us, and for those starving and sick creatures God promised to give us and then denied us. Let us in, let us cure them, teach them, save them."_

He whispers

_"Let me in."_

And Gadriel hears his old self whispering

_"All right. Come in, Light Bringer."_

Light Bringer...

Lucifer?


	20. Turning Point

It's been three weeks."

Sam is practicing magic in Rudi's yard, and he's not really focused. Linda has been blowing up his phone since last week because Kevin hasn't returned yet, and Rudi doesn't seem worried at all. "I guess Fairy Land is not in the same space-time continuum" , he said, and Linda yelled at him she just wanted her son back, not a fucking class on quantum physics.

She would certainly have been angrier if she had got the Back To The Future reference.

Sam is starting to get a little worried, because Gadriel and Hannah are also on his back. The "Faithful", the group of angels who decided to free Michael from the Cage, are planning to attack Hell in a few days, maybe less than a week, and everybody's wondering where is Castiel.

"Maybe something happened Rudi"

He tries again. Rudi is teaching him how to defend himself against magic attacks, and right now, he's holding Sam's heart, without touching him.

"Focus Sam... You will lose people in battle, it will be a stressful moment. You need to push me away"

Rudi's getting on Sam's nerves. You don't want to talk about it? thinks Sam, then I'll make you. He thinks about Saskia being hurt, lying dead on the side of the Yellow Brick Road, and he sends it the harder he can on Rudi's fourth shakra.

"You bastard!"

Shouts the warlock, letting Sam's heart go. He looks genuinely pissed, and in anger, he turns a nearby boulder to dust. Sam jerks. He's never seen Rudi that angry, and soon, Rudi says

"Of course I'm worried! What do you think?"

He walks around and glares at Sam

"If it wasn't for you, I would be there looking for my kid."

Sam shakes his head and apologizes. He's right. Rudi's stuck here because he needs to be trained.

"I'm sorry, it's my..."

Rudi sighs

"Oh shut up..."

Sam raises his head, a little hurt by his friend's harsh words. But surprisingly, Rudi's sadly smiling.

"It's not your fault kiddo, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I'm just worried."

He sits in the grass, and Sam sits close to him, mumbling

"I know..."

Rudi pats his shoulder

"Not only about Saskia you know. I'm also worried about you. I don't want you to go to that battle alone, I don't want you to get hurt, I hope my training will be enough for you to..."

Sam laughs, and Rudi looks at him with an half outraged, half amused stare.

"What?"

"Nothing" Sam says. Everything that comes to his mind sounds cheesy and childish. These three weeks of training have felt almost like a holiday. Rudi has his temper, but he's the closest thing to a normal dad Sam has ever had. And it always surprising him when he sees how the old man has grown fond of him, when he's never seen himself as someone that likeable. In this way, he's much more like Dean than he could have thought before.

"I'll be fine Rudi" he says, trying to smile. Attentions like this hits him with nostalgia.

Rudi ruffles his hair and adds

"I won't let you fight alone."

Sam looks at him, surprised.

"But you said..."

Rudi frowns.

"I know what I said. That I can't see Saskia threatened. But guess what?"

Sam cuts

"If she's not here..."

Rudi gives him a slap at the back of his head, and Sam shouts "Ow!".

"You big idiot"

He says, shaking his head.

"What kind of parent would I be if I let my kids fight alone?"

Sam isn't sure he has heard correctly.

"Your..."

Rudi rolls his eyes.

"Aren't we slow. Yes, my kids. Sam, you're my apprentice. That makes you pretty much my kid."

Sam looks at him, and he has trouble hiding the turmoil he's feeling. Rudi continues

"I told you I couldn't see Saskia threatened, that I was afraid of what I could do... Well I know my daughter, I know she will dive into that battle to help you retrieve your brother. And I won't let either of you get hurt."

He coughs.

"Maybe it's time for me to stop being afraid of what I can do and... maybe it's time for me to... grow. As a warlock."

Sam asks

"What do you mean?"

Rudi takes his hand.

"I mean, I'd like to form my own coven. With you and Saskia."

A coven. During these last days, Sam spent his evenings reading books about various subjects, included the European History of Magic, and he knows what forming a coven means. It's a bond stronger than family. It's sharing your power and be faithful to one another, for life, and beyond. Asking him to be part of a coven is basically adopting him.

"Rudi that's uh..."

"I know it's a big... thing to handle Sam but... with this incoming battle, we need all the power we can get and uh..."

He laughs

"Oh who am I kidding, I like you. You get along well with my daughter, you're a good kid, you're an excellent warlock in training..."

Sam laughs to, a little embarrassed, and he says

"Ok. If Saskia agrees..."

"She will. Before she went to the other side, she told me she felt really close to you. That it was nice to know someone who had been through exactly the same thing."

Sam nods.

"You'll be a much better brother to her than that scumbag Logan Atkins that I would skin like a bunny if he was still alive."

Sam laughs again.

"Ok then. When they're back, we'll do the coven spell"

Rudi gets up and adds

"And don't worry about your beloved, spouses are automatically made members of the coven."

Sam lies down laughing and covers his eyes in pretended shame.

He's never felt so happy and so strong in his life.

* * *

"Wait here."

"But..."

"I said, wait here!"

Saskia sits on the ground, sulking. You're bossy, she says. And mean. She adds

"Rick said..."

And Logan snaps

"I know what my dad said, but he ain't here is he?"

When Logan talks about Rick with Saskia, he never calls him "dad", it's always "my dad". As if he wanted to emphasize the fact that he's not, and won't ever be Saskia's. Even if he always compliments her, even if he's alway telling Logan that this little kid is a better hunter at 9 years old that he will ever be. At least i'm not a monster, Logan thinks. Because if his dad wasn't screwing the mother, the offspring would have been dead the minute they saw what she could do. So he's not going to work with her. He's not going to give her all the credit, again.

You're being ridiculous. It's just a kid. You're 23 years old.

Passing thought...

A kid? Yeah right. What kind of kid can put monsters on fire, uh? Her mother says she can't hurt people, but Logan thinks it's just a matter of time before she starts toasting someone. She looks innocent, cute even, but it's just a trick. A trick. And he's the only one who sees it. Well, that's fair to say the others don't like her and her mother. They've all seen what she could do, they've all seen her eyes, her real eyes, the amber ones, and the smile she makes when she burns things.

His contact told him the werewolf was hiding not far away from here. The little devil is sit on the ground beside the car, playing with pebbles. He doesn't need her to kill a god damn werewolf. No sir.

He silently walks to a nearby wheat field, and crouches, observing a distant light. A fire? Maybe he's camping. Out in the open? What an idiot. After killing three people he should know better.

He scratches his wrist, and feels old scars under his touch. Cigarette burns. When Rick was the alcoholic asshole he still is at heart. Teaming Logan up with a fire demon. Fire. He can't stand it. He's scared of it. He's been burnt too many times, when the old man was angry at him for merely existing. Anger begins to fill his body and he knows it's not good. He should be focusing on his prey, not on his fucked up childhood. It drives him mad when Rick shows her off like a circus monkey. He wants to tell her, he doesn't really like you! He's just an ambitious dick, and you're just a tool! But he ruffles her hair, he calls her sweetheart, and there she is, jumping on his lap and babbling about nonsense. Rick doesn't love anyone except Rick, you idiot.

Kay's just a child Logan! He says. Yeah right. We'll talk about that when she starts burning people. Logan doesn't know what to do with her. She tries to takes his hand and tells him he's like an older brother. Can't she see how much she repells him sometimes? Why does she try to get close? Why does she... Oh fuck.

He heard a noise right behind him, and before he could do anything, he was surrounded with growls and shiny eyes.

Logan didn't expect a whole pack. He thought the werewolf was a loner. Well he was wrong. And now he's screwed. There are 5 weres around him, he managed to kill two, but the others are surrounding him. The fire was a trap, of course it was. And he only brought a stupid shotgun. Well, he won't go without a fight, no he won't. He's prepared to face them, when he hears a young voice yelling "Over here!".

The little devil is standing a yard away, and she shoots in their direction, missing her target, of course, because the gun is way too big for her. But the werewolves run to her, showing their teeth, certainly thinking "that's gonna be an easy meal". How wrong of them. She has that look.

They surround the kid, and suddenly - he saw that a thousand times but it is scary every single one - her eyes turn yellow, and start to glow. The air begins to get really hot, and Logan runs to the field, to the car, knowing what's going to happen. He has barely reached the car when a giant fire ball lights up the night. He hears the werewolves screaming. One of them is running away but he's on fire. He collapses.

A few minutes after that, the kid hasn't returned yet. Logan thinks for a second "Maybe she died this time", and this thought makes him feel...relieved.

You really are a despicable human being.

He walks to her, and sees her, lying on the ground. She passed out again and half of her clothes is burnt. She has blood on her nose and is barely breathing.

Again.

That's gonna kill her someday. Hopefully.

She's just a kid for fuck sake.

He picks her up and carries her to the car. Dad wouldn't like if he lost his favorite weapon.

He puts her on the passenger's seat, and fastens her seatbelt. He reluctantly covers her with his jacket, because if she gets sick that's gonna be on him. In her sleep, she holds his jacket with her left hand, and starts sucking on her right thumb. Like a baby.

She's cute, he has to admit it.

The devil is seductive, he repeats to himself. You need to focus on what you know. And what you know is fire isn't a witch power. Don't look at her like she's a normal kid. Maybe she's never even been one. Yes dad made her and her mother drink holy water and it didn't do anything. But still. He doesn't know why he has to take her everywhere he goes since last year, when her crazy mother finished tattooing her. That way she won't be dangerous for anyone she said, that wacko. That trainwreck. That whore. He prefered Lou, and that's saying something. Who tattoos an 8 years old? Why does he care anyway? Take her with you son, teach her to hunt on her own. Yeah right. Like Logan has time to babysit demons.

She saved him tonight. Again.

He's been driving for 3 hours when she wakes up, looking a little disoriented. She still has blood on her face, and she's rubbing it with her little fingers. Her eyes are green again, and a little shiny. Feverish.

"Where are we Lo?"

"On the road. And don't call me that.

"Sorry. Did I kill them?"

"Yes you did."

He looks angrily at the road.

"Are you okay?" says Saskia with a little voice. Logan sighes.

"Yeah."

She doesn't know what to say, he can see that. He knows she'd like him to say something nice to her. But if she talks to him, he's gonna snap. He always does that, she drives him nuts. Rick forbid him to touch her so sometimes, when he's really mad, he hits a wall, or his car, or himself. Or he burns his palm with his cigarette. As if he didn't have enough scars, as if he didn't had enough reasons to loathe himself.

"Thanks."

She did save him after all.

"What?"

"Thanks...for saving my ass back there."

Saskia begins to loudly laugh. She's making fun of him?

"Why the hell are you laughing?" he says, looking really mad.

"You said ass", Saskia says, still giggling.

A kid.

A few minutes later, she's back to sleep, still curled up in his jacket. She mumbles things he can't understand, and her hair is falling on her face. Before he can fully think about it, he's tugging it behind her ear, and she makes a little sigh. He laughs.

Moron. He got caught again.

He lights up a cigarette and starts smoking to calm down. Why can't he keep his resolve about her?

Be strong.

He burns his palm again.

"Aaaah!"

Logan wakes up, covered in cold sweat. He dreamt about Jager, about... Saskia. Why? Why now? He wasn't even aware he could dream. Since when is he actually able to sleep? And why is Andras staring at him like the freak he is?

"Please don't tell me you were watching me sleep?" he says, already annoyed.

The blond boy smiles

"I was! You fell asleep in the arena, I carried you on this bed. I felt like I deserved a reward."

Logan thinks that if he touched him in his sleep he's gonna torture him. Or not. He might like it.

"Well thanks, I guess."

Andras gets up and says, with a coy look

"You were adorable. Who were you dreaming about?"

Logan is going to mumble a not-of-ya-business, but he sees in Andras eyes that he knows.

"You know who. I just don't know how you do."

Andras rolls his eyes

"Who wouldn't know, after years spent in Hell, about the infamous lost child of Azazel?"

Logan jerks

"What?"

Andras looks genuinely surprised.

"You mean you don't know?"

Logan doesn't know what to answer and Andras begins to laugh.

"That, my dear, is absolutely priceless."

He continues

"Azazel had this great plan of conceiving a child who would lead his legions on Earth, and who would be, ultimately, his vessel."

Logan frowns. Azazel, the demon from the Bible? Is Andras serious?

"One day, there was that one witch whose newborn and husband were murdered and who turned to a dark coven to resurrect her babe"

That would be Ellen.

"Azazel saw that as a great occasion, and he brought the child back to life, with his blood. He thought she was going to be his masterpiece but..."

He sits back on Logan's bed, faking a sad look.

"The baby put the house on fire and was killed with her mother. Except..."

He smiles.

"Except that wasn't true."

Logan finally manages to speak

"How the Hell do you know that?"

Andras raises an eyebrow

"Call that... Hell Radio? I heard it from Agares who heard it from I don't remember who, who absolutely hated Azazel and didn't want to see him succeed."

Logan feels a little... satisfied. He was right. She was indeed a demon.

"We kept the secret. And when we were told about your story, how you were killed by a fire throwing witch, we kind of connected the dots."

His story. He doesn't want to hear it through Andras's mouth. The boy gets closer to him.

"How was it?"

Logan gets defensive

"How was what?"

Andras smiles

"To have a slave?"

Logan remembers how he used to chain her, after Rick died. So she wouldn't escape, so she wouldn't be a threat to others. He made her work for the group, a lot. She was a way to avoid casualties, she was his best weapon. She was...

"I've always wanted to have one."

Andras continues, and the lust in his tone makes Logan want to punch him. It was never about... Oh God.

"The feeling of power the... grip you have... and someone's life and the fact... they totally depend on you to survive, that... that would make me get off..."

He says, lying on the bed like a cat, still staring intensely at Logan who's feeling sick. Yes it was about that. About power, about control. And his overwhelming hate for his father.

"And when she grew up..."

Andras smiles again, greedily, visibly turned on by the story. When she grew up. He started to notice her. How strikingly beautiful she was. The others said she was plain, not very noticeable. But he saw it, when she walked in a room, she eclipsed everyone, she...

"I would have done exactly the same"

Andras said, rolling on his side. That's precisely the problem.

"Too bad she didn't enjoyed it. I did. I've been owned."

Logan looks at him, in complete confusion.

"You can't tell me you enjoyed it."

Andras makes his scary laugh again.

"Well I did. I enjoyed every minute of it. I begged him for it in the end. I begged him to tie me up, gag me and..."

Logan cuts

"Stop."

Andras frowns, puzzled, and Logan says, with an unsteady voice

"That was a crime."

He coughs

"What I did. It was a crime. Whatever... whoever she was."

Andras laughs again

"I never said it wasn't darling. I just said it turns me on."

Logan looks at him and is hit by a wave of deep sadness. This boy, man, creature... was destroyed. Sold to a demon who abused him for decades, who turned him into that crazy psycho with a torture kink. Who was he, before he was broken into a million pieces?

Even with all his hate and anger, Logan always knew what he did was wrong. That he would pay, someday. And he did. He died the worst possible way for someone afraid of fire. And he ended up here, with the likes of him. Except...

"I'm not like you."

Andras stops smiling

"I know you think we're alike and you know what, maybe we are. But I won't..."

He breathes in

"I won't let you try to convince me this is right"

Andras gets up and pushes him against the wall, whispering close to his mouth

"Don't you understand? There's no right or wrong. We're beyond that."

Logan tries to push him away but his grip is strong.

"You liked it. You liked forcing yourself on her, didn't you?"

Logan wants to say no, but it would be lie. He had taken some coke. And yeah, it felt good to be... in control. For a moment. After that he went to throw up behind the motel and drank all the booze he could find to erase what had just happened and her look. Her fear, her anger... He called her at night and humiliated her, as if it could... somehow justify...

"You liked making her feel like the worthless worm she was, didn't you? Like you could crush her under your boot if you wanted, but you were too merciful to..."

Andras has slid one of his legs between Logan's.

"You're just like me."

And he lightly kisses Logan.

This is a turning point. This is the moment he decides what kind of person he wants to be. He's already doomed, he's already a Knight of Hell.

Does he let him continue?

Slide his hands wherever he wants to, because after all he's been craving for some contact these last years?

Does he let him drag him down with him?

* * *

"We're attacking tonight"

A crowd of angels cheers for the Faithful's Leader, all dressed in white.

"Tonight is the night we free our rightful leader. Tonight is the night we restore Heaven to its former glory."

Gadriel takes Hannah's hand. Castiel isn't back yet. They're all gonna die.


	21. Revenge

"Where's Castiel?"

The moment the group stepped out of the portal Vivian had created for them, the angel vanished in thin air. Saskia and Kevin feel a little dizzy, but the feeling soon disappeared when they realized the angel was missing.

"I'm calling Rudi"

Says Saskia, walking towards the library while Kevin begins to look for Cas who's nowhere to be found. She turns on her phone, and when she sees the date, she can't repress a "Holy fuck!". Apparently they've been gone for three weeks, when in Avalon it only felt like one day.

"He's not here" says Kevin, looking a little worried, when suddenly, they hear steps in the hallway. Charlie has arrived, and sooner than expected.

Before she can say anything Saskia asks

"Charlie, how long have you been in Oz?"

The redhead takes some time to think and says

"Uh... Six to seven months? I think... They have a different way of counting time so..."

Saskia rolls her eyes

"Dammit Hartfeld!"

And dials Rudi's number. After a few seconds, Rudi picks up and Saskia hears a very relieved

"Thank God!"

On the other side of the line. He was worried, of course he was, and Saskia's anger instantly vanishes. Rudi explains to her what happened to Cas, that he took his vessel with him and Sam so they could watch over him while they were gone.

"He's awake now sweetheart, don't worry." says her father, adding Sam is fine too, and that as a matter of fact, they've just had a conversation about them being gone for so long.

"What the Hell happened? How's Heaven and everything?"

Rudi sighes

"I don't really know. Either I did something wrong, or the Fae who sent you back did."

Saskia laughs

"Rudi, you're talking about a ages old Fae. You did something wrong, admit it."

Rudi coughs, and after a few seconds he says

"Well, we have no proof of this, have we? Anyway it doesn't matter, it gave me time to tattoo and train Sam, Heaven is more or less fine, for now, and tell Kevin to call his mom before she calls me again. She's already called me three times today and I don't know what to tell her anymore. She just yells at me."

As Saskia's just put the phone on speaker, Kevin burst out laughing and begins to dial his mother's number. Linda must be crazy worried.

"Sam, Cas and I are coming in a few, just the time for us to pack."

Rudi hangs up and Saskia sits down, chuckling. That guy is priceless. Charlie awkwardly sits close to her and says

"Uh, would you mind giving me a little heads up?"

Saskia smiles.

"Of course not. Anything you want."

She doesn't know precisely why, but she likes Charlie. She looks like the girl friend she never had. When she was a hunter, the other girls were afraid of her, and Rick's ex, Lou, hated her and her mother. And in North Kingston, she was absolutely unable to chit chat, she didn't know what subjects girls liked to talk about, and she always felt like they thought she was weird. Which was probably true. Normal people don't spend their afternoons practicing juggling with a butterfly knife. So she apologizes for not welcoming her properly, before telling her everything she wants to know.

In the cabin, Castiel is confused to hear his vessel remained on Earth while he was in Avalon, but is relieved to hear Rudi put Jimmy to sleep while he was away.

"I figured the poor guy wouldn't like to wake up in the middle of that mess"

Says the warlock, while packing a few clothes. Castiel nods

"You took the right decision. Any news from Heaven?"

Sam answers for Rudi

"Gadriel and Hannah called several times, the last time was three days ago. They seemed pretty... anxious I'd say, but they wouldn't tell me anything."

Castiel frowns.

"Why?"

Sam wants to reply, "I don't know, they're angels", but seeing Castiel's face, now is not the time.

"They said they wanted to talk to you and only to you."

The angel looks even more concerned, and Sam adds

"They know I was stuck here training. I guess they didn't want me to worry Cas."

Sam know it's certainly not the reason why they refused to disclose anything, angels not being the most caring people around, but Cas looks like someone who's been hit by a bus. Who knows what he learnt back there in Fairy Land.

Cas stutters.

"H..how do you... feel... Sam?"

Sam smiles

"I feel good. I feel ready."

Rudi laughs

"We don't know that yet kid."

He turns to Castiel

"I couldn't have him training on actual demons, Cas, I didn't want to raise the King's attention, or his brother's."

Cas nods appreciatively.

"You took the right decision my friend."

Rudi grins

"Yeah well, we'll see that on the battlefield, but I'm fairly confident."

Sam laughs

"Well that's surprising."

Castiel looks at them both and is stunned by Sam's visible... happiness? He's never seen him like this, not ever since he met him. Maybe Rudi was right about Sam's powers, maybe he did need them.

Rudi pats Sam on the back and calls him an airhead for forgetting things in the living room. Sam laughs again.

No, it's not this. At least not entirely. Sam simply needed someone to rely on. A parent. A friend. And the warlock is that for him. He wonders what Dean would think of this. If he would be happy for his brother, or... if he would feel let down. Forgotten. It's been a long time since they last talked about him. Since they last heard about him. The last time they did, it was to hear terrifying tales about the bloodthirsty wing man of the King of Hell. Is the Dean they all know still... alive? Is there a way they can get him back?

Does Sam still care?

He shakes his head. Of course Sam cares. He's being unfair.

He misses Dean.

He misses his friend, and if there is something eating him from the inside it's the idea that he might be obliged to fight him soon.

"Guess what mate? Our feathery friends are attacking tonight!"

Crowley feels great. His informant told him the Faithful were going to attack, and that they had totally bought this loophole thing he completely made up. They're already picturing themselves being led by their rightful leader in a shiny armor, and frankly, this is hilarious. The whole situation is hilarious. And it is, as Dean would say, awesome. Though he doesn't say it now.

He's sulking.

As usual.

"Are your knights ready?"

Dean raises an eyebrow. At least, he takes his job seriously, not that he has a choice, but he does. He drinks a sip of bourbon and says

"They are."

And goes back to his drink. Crowley sighs

"Care to give me some more details?"

While Dean is finishing his drink. The hunter scratches the Mark on his arm, a little lost in his thoughts, and he replies

"Well Kimaris did an excellent job. She and Katrina trained their legions perfectly."

Crowley nods

"I'm not surprised. Alastair was an idiot for locking her up."

Dean asks

"Why did he?"

Crowley shrugs his shoulders

"For what I know, he blamed her when Lucifer was locked in the Cage. She used to be his personal... bodyguard?"

He pours himself another drink

"She's certainly still faithful to Luci so I hope she knows who she works for now..."

Dean rolls his eyes and Crowley pretends he didn't see

"It's important she does? "

Dean mutters

"I guess"

Crowley taps his glass with his fingernails. The whole situation is so awkward it's borderline depressing.

"And what about the others?"

Dean breathes out heavily

"Agares is a psycho. His legions are like... the Hannibal Lecter's version of Caesar's army."

Crowley nods.

"Andras is equally a nutjob, but that guy Logan has kind of a good influence on him. I heard he used to be a hunter?"

Crowley answers

"Apparently so."

Dean insists

"So how did he end up in Hell?"

Crowley smirks

"You didn't read you recruits' resume did you Dean? T-t-t..."

Because he thought he would get rid of Crowley before he had to form his team, that poor naive creature, thinks the King.

"Logan Atkins, son of Rick Atkins, one of your father's... colleagues?"

Dean knows that name. He heard it somewhere but he can't remember when or where.

"He...fancied some witch girl. Used her as his slave."

Crowley sees Dean's eye widen, he's not used yet at being a demon, that's adorable. He looks genuinely shocked to hear one of his fellow hunter can be like this.

"Apparently she could cast fire on anything except humans. Until the day she was able to. She, Atkins and all their group burnt. And that's how he arrived here."

Dean is biting the inside of his cheeks to conceal his anger. He perfectly knows who Crowley's talking about. Saskia Jager. The witch he met two years ago in Rhode Island. Crowley doesn't seem to know she's alive, and most importantly, that she's one of Azazel's children, like Sam.

Sam... How long has it been since the last time they saw each other? Since the last time he heard about him? Meg said he was nowhere to be found, and that's a good thing, it means he doesn't go out of the bunker, that he stays safe. He wonders sometimes what Sam would think of his plan, and he's pretty sure he would disapprove. Not that he can blame him. He was right to worry about the Blade, he was right about... pretty much everything. But if becoming the King means he can destroy Hell for good, then he has to do it.

He needs to succeed, he needs to overthrow the Scot.

"That's going pretty well"

Said Meg the other day, when Dean asked her how her lobbying for him was going. She became friend - well as much as two demons can become friends - with Katrina and Kimaris, and asked him to visit their arena several times. Dean followed her advise and praised their work. He couldn't help but notice it was excellent. The soldiers seemed loyal and well trained, they even mentioned not being tortured even once.

As it appears, they're both looking for a leader with, as Kimaris put it "a strong sense of justice and loyalty". Dean just had to subtly pretend that in the end, he was ready to hand the Crown to its rightful owner to gain an approving nod from the fallen angel.

It was harder with Agares. Firstly because he absolutely loathes that snake. He knew exactly how he had trained his Legions, and who he had recruited. He couldn't help but realize the guy seemed completely at ease surrounded by former serial killers, nazis and KKK members. Secondly, because Agares is the kind to be bought, and Meg had to promise him things Dean was very reluctant to give.

"I can't let him roam free on Earth Meg, I can't promise that to that sociopath. You heard what he did when it happened the last time."

Meg sighed.

"This is realpolitik Deano. You promise stuff. Then you don't keep your promises. You just have to convince him you're on his side. When you're King, you'll just kill him."

That was a more pleasant perspective, and Dean put on a real show, enough to make Agares clap his hands with excitement. If Dean had been able to throw up, he would have.

The last one he has to talk about is Andras, and frankly, after learning those things about Atkins, he really doesn't feel like it. The moment he's out of Crowley's office, he's going to call Meg.

He really need one of her demonic motivational speeches.

Andras lips are on his.

Ok.

First he's not gay. Or is he? Anyway, that guy looks more like a girl than a ...

"Stop."

He spoke? Well obviously he did because Andras has stopped, and he is looking at him with a... distraught stare.

"I don't... understand you..."

He says, almost whispering. Logan walks back to the couch he was sleeping on a few minutes ago and sits. Andras rubs his eyes almost violently, raising his voice

"You like your guilt, don't you Logan?"

What guilt? Until very recently he didn't feel guilty. At least consciously.

"You think you're better than us? You think you're better than me?"

Logan frowns

"Andras, that's not about you. That's about what I did."

The boy starts laughing, but there's something broken in his laugh, something almost painful.

"You did NOTHING to her. NOTHING! Why can't you see that? You just laid with her once!"

He laughs again

"I know it's a entire different era than the one I was born in but still!"

He pauses, and then takes a contemptuous gaze

"If you're so haunted by petty things like this, how can you be deemed to be one of us?"

Logan whispers

"It's not an honor..."

And Andras turns around

"I hope this is a joke", he yells, "we are the Knights of Hell! We are the most powerful demons on this Earth and you..." he walks to Logan and grabs the collar of his jacket, obviously furious, "you think it's not an honor?"

Logan gently grabs Andras's wrist and says

"I ended up here because I hated everyone. Myself, my father, other humans, all the non-human creatures. Because I was madly jealous with a child who was fifteen years younger than me. Because I..."

He sees a glimpse of... what is that? in Andras's eyes.

"I beat her" he says, locking his eyes in the boy's, "I starved her. I chained her in my RV. I insulted her. I didn't care if she was sick. I used her as a tool. And..."

Is that humanity?

"At night, when I was drunk enough, or drugged enough, I came to her. Complaining about my life, asking her to listen to me and then... I did to her exactly what my dad did to me when I was a kid."

He rolls up one of his sleeves

"I burnt her arm with my cigarette, and you wanna know what Rick did to me when he was drunk?"

Andras bites his lip and doesn't say a word. Logan has never said that to anybody, he has actually spent his entire existence denying it ever happened.

"He came to my bed at night. Happened several times. And when he stopped drinking, he asked me to forgive him. He asked me to move on, so we could be a family again."

He laughs bitterly

"I said yes, because I had no one else. And he told me he was sorry, that it was the booze's fault, that the booze was like this... demon, making him do things."

Andras slowly sits on the floor in front of Logan.

"I was fourteen years old. My mother died when I was nine. He was drunk pretty much all the time. That makes a whole lotta nights. And every single time, he finished by burning my arms, my thighs, my..."

Logan doesn't look at Andras anymore, he's buried deep in his memories, and now that he's started talking, he needs to let it out.

"He said I had my mother's eyes. He said "you see what you do to me?". And I forgave him because I had no one else, because I was too weak to run away. Didn't stop him from beating me like a dog when I disrespected him."

He closes his eyes for a moment

"That's where I come from. And I did all those things to her. I took my revenge on her, because he was treating her like a normal kid. Because he..."

It's becoming hard.

"Because he would have never touched her."

He opens his eyes again, and Andras looks like a rag doll, his eyes lost.

"So no, I don't think I'm better than you. But I didn't..." it's even hard to pronounce, "I didn't enjoy what Rick put me through. I didn't enjoy being his thing. So how could she..."

Andras starts talking again, with an almost childish voice, his gaze still unsteady.

"He's certainly here."

Logan looks at him, a little worried.

"Who?"

Andras raises his head, and he looks, suddenly extremely young, not more than fifteen.

"Your father?"

He's never thought about this... He's still Rick's soldier in so many ways. He hadn't even considered what he had done to him could lead him straight to Hell. He nods. Andras continues

"If he did... what he did... he's here."

He really looks strange, so strange that Logan grabs his shoulder and shakes him gently.

"I don't care if he is okay? He's dead, he's been dead for a long time now."

Andras gets up and says, with a dull tone

"I'll be out for a moment, stay here, I heard the Master plans to visit us today."

Logan opens his mouth but before he can say anything, Andras cuts him and says

"I like him. I trust you to answer for both of us."

And he walks out the room, leaving Logan speechless.

He walks instinctively, not even thinking about where he's going. He knows where. He knows exactly where. He's been a prisoner long enough. Demons bow when they see him and clear the way. That's a good thing. He's not in the mood to be disturbed.

The door to Hell's Cells still look the same. Old, rusty, dreadful. It excites him a bit to cross it again, but he feels somehow relieved to know he can cross it back whenever he wants.

When he opens the door, he takes his most seductive tone and whispers

"I heard you liked them young?"

The guy in front of him is wearing flannels and a pair of jeans.

He smiles.

He won't smile for long when he sees Andras's knives.

When he sees Saskia, Sam almost runs to her and hugs her close. He would like to have enough words to tell her how grateful he is for everything she brought to him, but can't find anything spirited to say. It's so nice to be back home, to see the whole... Scooby Gang reunited. Castiel has picked up Linda who's passionately listening to Kevin's rendition of his adventure in Oz, Rudi and Cas are talking like old friends and even Charlie came to help. If Dean was there it would be just...

"Easy Gigantor..."

Says Saskia, laughing. She's gently patting his back, and Sam lets her go, still holding her hands. He manages to whisper a shy thank you before hearing Linda say

"Kids, angels, wizards, it's almost noon, I brought some Udons, what if we all had a nice lunch before getting back to work?"

Sam sees Kevin grabbing Saskia's arm saying "I'm staaaarving!", quickly followed by Charlie. Rudi pats Sam's shoulder before walking to the kitchen, and Sam tells him he's coming in a minute. He thinks he's alone when he feels Castiel's hand on his arm.

"You're not hungry Sam?" he says, and Sam turns around, his eyes filled with tears.

"What's wrong?" asks the angel.

"I wish Dean could see this" he says. "I wish he could see he has... we have... a family."

Castiel carefully hugs Sam and says, softly.

"Soon."


	22. Voici l'Orage

In the Bunker's kitchen, the silence is quite heavy. Saskia and Kevin have just finished telling everyone what they learnt about God, and it's fair to say that it was like dropping a nuclear bomb in the middle of Linda's udons.

_"Uh... something is bugging me guys..."_

Says Charlie, breaking the awkward silence. Everybody turns to her and she explains

_"You said your were led to Avalon by uh... God, basically, right?"_

Saskia and Kevin nod, not really understanding where she's going.

_"Vivian said she wanted to see him brought to justice, she said he was dangerous, that they were enemies... pretty much."_

Saskia frowns and adds

_"So why would he lead us to her? That's what's bugging you"_

Charlie grins

_"Yeah! Exactly!"_

And then looks embarrassed.

_"I know I'm not helping but uh... I really don't want us to dive in that God hunt without knowing where we're going."_

Sam smiles at her and says

_"Well, the tablets were hidden in the Earth's Vaults, so they were not made to be read by anyone, at least not now. Maybe God wrote those in case the situation would go out of control?"_

Saskia continues

_"Yeah. Vivian is a really powerful fairy, right Charlie?"_

Charlie nods

_"Oh yeah. There were never any dark witch in Ys, and there's a good reason why, they feared her. "_

Kevin asks

_"So... why did this war went on for so long then?"_

Charlie rolls her eyes

_"Well as depressing as it may seem... because of politics. Avalon is an ensemble of kingdoms ruled by Oberon, but every kingdom is independent and has its own form of government. Vivian is the one and only queen of Ys, when Oz was governed by a group of witches and wizards."_

She eats some pastas and when she raises her head, she notices everybody is carefully listening to her

_"So uh... Vivian basically smote the dark witches without asking for anyone's point of view when in Oz they were at first accepted in the Council which led to them taking over and everything."_

Rudi laughs and with a very heavy german accent says

_"I rrreally like zis Fifian."_

The whole group laughs and Sam says

_"Shoot first, ask question later, she could be a pretty good hunter.", _and then more seriously, he adds, _"if God wrote in his tablet to seek for Vivian's help, it means he had anticipated it would get ugly, that someday he would need someone with that kind of power, and that kind of mercilessness."_

Linda speaks for the first time

_"So why didn't he do it earlier?"_

Castiel, who's been silent since they arrived says

_"Because of his pride? Because he thought he could handle it all by himself... with his power, his knowledge... Because he thought he could somehow make things better until he realized he couldn't?"_

Rudi smiles at the angel, understanding who he's really talking about

_"He resurrected you my friend, you and Gadriel. It means he thinks you can handle it."_

Castiel replies coldly

_"He's wrong."_

Before vanishing in thin air. After all, Gadriel and Hannah must be impatiently waiting for him.

Yay.

Dean is walking to Andras and Logan's quarters, and despite the conversation he's just had with Meg, he still feels like cutting Logan's head off. Meg is right though, this is Hell. Literally. He's surrounded by demons. He is one. And there are some who are much much worse than Atkins around. And some, like Kimaris and Katrina, who seem completely out of place in that environment.

_"That's because you don't end up in Hell only out of being... evil, Dean" _explained Meg. _"You get here for a fuckton of different reasons. The thing we all have in common is anger, though. Anger and revenge."_

Dean shook his head. He missed the days when demons were not their usual gig. Now everything is blurry and complicated. Some angels are utter dicks, some demons are not that evil... Damn...

Fortunately, there's an infinite amount of bourbon down there, probably Crowley's idea to make him feel at home. He can't get drunk, but at least he can try.

_"Were you? Angry I mean?" _he asked Meg, while drinking another glass.

Meg was startled by his question. Dean and her were old enemies, and right now, they were only collaborating out of their common hate for the Scot. And maybe also because of Clarence. Spending weeks with him in that mental institution changed her to a point she can't even describe. It was like waking up from a very, very long nightmare. He saw something in her she thought had disappeared centuries ago.

_"Yeah... yeah I was." _she muttered, and after a few seconds of silence, Dean said

_"I've never asked you... how you ended up here" _

His voice was calm, and he seems pensive. Meg wondered why he needed to know that now, especially now they should get prepared for battle. He was not facing her, almost completely lied down in one of those comfy Mad Men armchairs Crowley liked so much.

Meg breathed in.

It wasn't that she was ashamed of who she used to be. Well. She was... no one then.

_"I was um... sacrificed."_

She said, a little embarrassed. She didn't like to think about her helpless days, she preferred to invent stories about her being the devil's spawn or some kind of powerful and evil witch who ate children for breakfast. That was badass, that was impressive. Not being chosen by druids to have your blood shed on a sacred stone.

_"For the harvest."_

Dean turned and faced her, as if to encourage her to continue. Meg pours herself a drink, and tries to keep on looking carefree.

_"Not quite the story you were expecting huh?"_

Dean frowns. Indeed, no, it wasn't.

_"I died angry. And that sacrifice was basically...selling my soul. To Azazel. That's how I met him. Now you know everything."_

The hunter mutters

_"No. Not everything. What's your real name?"_

Meg sighes

_"I've had many."_

She looks at her boss and sees he won't be satisfied by this.

_"Meara."_

Dean raises an eyebrow

_"Meara?"_

Meg laughs

_"What? It means sea, I used to live by the sea, nothing to... see here Dean."_

Dean smiles at the pun

_"You can stick to Meg, it's been my name long enough."_

He puts his drink back on the table

_"There's also something I'd like to know. How did you survive? Crowley said he had killed you."_

Meg gets up and says

_"He can't kill me. A part of my soul is locked here. Whatever happens, if it's not freed, I'll always come back right here."_

She gets closer to Dean

_"That's why I need you to destroy this place Dean. I want to die for good."_

Dean doesn't understand

_"What do you mean you're stuck here?"_

Meg sits on the ground

_"All the people who were sold to demons, or who made deals are stuck in Hell. When you sell your soul, or when it's sacrificed, it's kept here, in Hell's Vaults."_

Dean frowns. He's never heard that before.

_"But... My Dad he...And I.."_

Meg sighs

_"You and your dad were never... amputated... of your soul. You needed to be corrupted to achieve what Azazel wanted."_

Dean nods

_"Why keeping those souls?"_

Meg raises an eyebrow

_"To keep us here? The first thing anyone who's been sold would do, the minute he can go out would be trying to get killed. Those contracts are made to be forever Dean. Crowley didn't know how I became a demon, he genuinely thought he had killed me before he realized he hadn't and that I could be of some use."_

Dean asks

_"What use?"_

Meg shugs

_"Dunno. Maybe he just wanted to torture me some more, maybe... I really don't know Dean."_

Dean gets up

_"I'll do it."_

Meg turns to him

_"Do what?"_

_"Free you? I'll free us. All of us who need to be freed."_

Meg makes a little half smile.

_"My hero."_

_"You don't want to cure them?"_

Hannah is speaking really low but she's angry. She was so relieved when she saw Castiel back in his office, and so glad to hear he had something to temporarily cure them that when he said he wanted to let the Faithful go to battle with fading Graces disappointment hit her hard.

_"It means they're going to get slaughtered Castiel, I hope you realize."_

Gadriel says

_"Can we really afford... more casualties Castiel?"_

Castiel turns to him and says, harshly

_"Can we afford to have Michael and Lucifer out?"_

Hannah heavily sits on a chair. He's right. They need to fight to prove they're united, but they definitely need to lose this fight or the world will drown in another Apocalypse. Gadriel replies

_"I saw... my past... Castiel. In the archives room. I saw... who Lucifer, or Enki, whatever his name used to be, was. And he wasn't evil. Don't you think that maybe, just maybe, he could have been... tricked? Into believing he was a monster, into remembering things he's supposed to have done?"_

Castiel frowns

_"Maybe. But we didn't find a way to restore our memories did we?"_

Hannah shakes her head.

_"And we all saw Michael in action when he was our Commander. Gadriel, I'm not saying your hypothesis is wrong, I'm saying that for now, Michael and Lucifer are the way we've always known them, and that if they're freed, it's going to be the end of the world."_

Gadriel asks

_"Yes but do you really think we can win? I mean with our graces replenished? We're talking about the Knights of Hell's Legion here..."_

Hannah adds

_"I don't think you realize how outnumbered we are. Plus now I know who the Knights are, I don't know all of them, but I know two very well. Meg Masters, Agares and Kimaris."_

Castiel knew about Meg but she never told them who were the others. He mutters

_"No... How Dean..."_

How Dean could have chosen them? They're extremely, extremely dangerous. Kimaris used to command Lucifer's Legions before he was locked in the Cage. He's never met her, but he knows she's an very talented tactician. And Agares is one of the cruelest young demons. Born a human a little bit more than two thousand years ago, and who climbed up Hell's social ladder very quickly, out of his outstanding cruelty.

If Dean has chosen them, it means... It means he wants to win.

Hannah sees he's troubled and she says

_"Maybe Crowley chose them."_

Knowing he didn't, her informant were quite clear.

_"But my point is, Commander, that we need to unite, and we need to avoid losing too many people."_

Gadriel asks

_"Will Sam, Saskia and her father help?"_

Castiel answers

_"They will focus on capturing Dean. They need to go close enough so they will certainly have to fight. But I don't think they will be there to help us."_

Gadriel nods and Hannah asks

_"Will you?"_

Castiel looks at her, a little hurt. She repeats

_"Will you fight against Dean Winchester?"_

The angel closes his eyes and sighs

_"Let's heal our people"_

Agares is humming an old french song while walking in the long hallways of Hell's Cells.

_Il pleut, il pleut, bergère, rentre tes blancs moutons_

If it lacks something in Hell, it's some innocence. It's so lovely, so delicate. The last time he was on Earth, young girls were raised in delightful little convents, out of the world and they only got out to get married, still unaware of how children were made.

They were shy. And pale. And fragile like porcelain.

_Rentrons dans ma chaumière, bergère vite allons._

It was a indescribable pleasure to play with them. Their eyes widening with fear. Their supplications. Their screams... Red blood on white skin... He sighs. There's no way he will ever find that in Hell. He needs to go back to Earth. He needs to make deals again. And if the Master becomes King, well maybe he will.

_J'entends sur le feuillage, l'eau qui tombe à grand bruit_

Maybe the Marquis is in Hell too, who knows. They did have a lot of fun together, before Alastair decided to lock him down here and leave him to rot. Not that he didn't enjoy it. It was after all, a nice change. He used to be the one chaining and torturing others, and you should always get a taste of your own medicine.

Delicious. Obviously.

Suddenly, he hears a very familiar voice singing

_Voici, voici l'orage ; voilà l'éclair qui luit._

It's Andras. Covered in blood from head to toe, leaning on a wall, eyes closed. Charming boy, darling boy. Best deal of all. The epitome of innocence. His voice sounded like crystal when he screamed in pain. And when he finally said yes...

Agares walks to him and whispers

_"You were bored I suppose my sweet..."_

Andras opens his eyes, and for a moment, Agares is sure he's seen hate in his eyes. But he smiles and then nudges his face on Agares's shoulder, mumbling

_"Yes... so bored, so bored, so bored..."_

Agares curls the boy's hair in his fingers and says

_"You have been a bad boy? Haven't you?"_

Andras gets a little stiff but Agares doesn't notice, that's a dialog they had a thousand times and Andras is supposed to know his lines.

_"When was the last time you were punished?"_

He says, now pulling Andras's hair and tilting his head back. Andras catches his wrist and shoves it away, still smiling, but with something hard in his eyes. He playfully answers

_"Not today _mon amour, _the Master is expecting me"_

Agares crosses his arms, looking incredulously at his former pet. It's the first time he ever refuses. And he's walking away. From him. Casually.

He grabs the boy's neck and smashes him on a wall, hissing between his teeth

_"Who do you belong to?"_

Fear. At last.

_"You... I belong to you..."_

Stutters Andras, feeling Agares's hands on his...

_"You see? It remembers."_

Andras smiles seductively and says

_"Yes it does..."_

Agares smirks and drags him to an empty cell. It's not because he cut his leash once that he's not his puppy anymore.

He needs to remember his place. Knight or not.

Sweet, sweet boy.

_"We're attacking tonight."_

Castiel is back in the bunker, and he really kills the mood. Everyone was comfortably sit in the library with steaming cups of coffee when he barged into the room announcing the battle was happening in six hour.

Sam turns to Rudi and asks

_"Are we... ready?"_

And the warlock smiles

_"In a few minutes, we'll be."_

He turns to Saskia

_"Saskia-love? I want to form a coven with you and Sam, what do you say?"_

Saskia chokes on her coffee

_"I say you could have mentioned that earlier Hartfeld"_

Sam looks suddenly embarrassed, and Saskia gets up and hugs him, laughing

_"I have nothing to wear! We won't even be able to celebrate it properly!"_

Sam laughs, relieved, and Saskia continues

_"You Germans... Always thinking about _arbeit _and nothing else."_

Rudi hugs her, whispering I'm so proud of you in her ear, and he turns to Sam saying in a grin

_"Let's start!"._


	23. Covens and Legions

Sam would like Dean to see this. They are all standing in a little grove, in the forest nearby the bunker, and there is an atmosphere of serenity and solemnity that he has never experience in any church.

Saskia has drawn a symbol on the ground with white chalk dust, a triangle, with little circles at every angle. She has put a candle in each an circled the whole thing with an Ouroboros. Then she draws another triangle inside the first one, but reversed. This symbol means after the ceremony, they will share everything, it has even power by itself. When Sam focuses on it, he can see the powder glow a little, and glow even more when Rudi puts a quartz crystal pyramid in the middle of the little triangle.

He has told him to keep silent about his relationship with Dean. Saying that it would trigger bad memories. You saw her life, he said, you know who I'm talking about. And Sam nodded, saying he would tell her later. On a strictly strategic point of view, Rudi's right. Saskia can't fight distraught. But Sam feels like he's betraying the trust she put in him, even if Rudi assured him of the contrary.

"It's ready."

She says, placing herself in one of the circles. Sam slowly walks towards her, soon joined by Rudi, and they all take hands.

Rudi begins to chant an incantation in Latin. It's happening.

"What on Earth happened to you?"

Andras is back in Logan and his quarters, and he's covered in blood. He crashes on a couch and says with a dull tone

"Did the Master come?"

Logan looks at him. Some of the blood is definitely his, he has cuts on his forearms, apparently quite deep, his neck is bruised, and so is his upper lip.

"You've been attacked?"

The boy gets up and walks aggressively towards Logan until he's way too close.

"You're not answering my question."

Logan rolls his eyes, saying that yes, he came with his second in command. That he asked him if they were loyal to him and ready to join his banner if he was making a pledge to be the new King.

"Since you told me you were loyal to him, I said yes."

Andras stares at him for a moment and whispers "good", before going back to his couch.

"The angels attack tonight. We need to get ready for the fight."

The blond boy doesn't answer, he's too busy staring at the blood stains on his clothes. Logan walks slowly and sits next to him. Andras mutters

"Your girl is dead..."

Logan frowns

"What?"

Andras turns to him, and stares at him with his innocent/creepy face

"I did a location spell the other day when I told you I'd find her for you, you remember?"

Logan nods

"Well she's dead, I'm sorry."

The hunter is a little confused

"Why are you sorry?"

Andras sighs

"Because I told you I would bring her to you, and I can't do it. You won't have your revenge. The only child of Azazel left is the Master's brother and I doubt he'd let you kill him."

He says, shrugging his shoulders. Logan is a little shocked. He had never considered Saskia could be dead. Maybe she died in that fire she made, maybe they both died that night. And since she's not here... He laughs, holding his face in his hands and Andras asks why, in a puzzled voice.

"All my life I thought she was a demon... and now looks who's in Hell and who's in Heaven."

Andras laughs

"Heaven is boring."

Logan opens his eyes

"Seriously though, what happened to you?"

Andras tilts his head

"Why do you want to know?"

Logan frowns

"Because you're hurt?"

The boy smiles, but his eyes are cold

"I'm not. I just played with Agares."

Logan rises and kicks a chair

"You need to stay away from him, you understand?"

Andras gets up and comes close to him, still smiling

"Why? Are you jealous?"

Logan holds his shoulders and sits him down

"Listen to yourself, jealous? Jealous? Are you fucking serious?"

He crouches in front of him

"We're going to battle tonight, ok? We're a team now, you get what it means?"

Andras shakes his head, and Logan explains

"We gotta have each other's back. We gotta protect each other, you hear me?"

Andras looks confused.

"It's not only about bloodshed and you getting off killing people, it's about winning, it's about winning a war."

Logan gently takes Andras's wrist

"So don't... don't get hurt, that's all I'm saying."

The boy looks at him, and he has those sad and lost eyes again

"You don't... want me to... get hurt?"

Logan nods

"No, I don't. So we need to clean up those wounds and be ready to fight, you with me?"

If someone had told him what would happen next just a few days ago he would have laughed at his face. Andras fell on the floor and hugged him, with way too much strength but that was still a hug. He didn't try to kiss him, or to lick his earlobe or anything weird he would have tried to do before. He just holds him, and Logan realizes their size difference. In spite of his impressive strength, Andras still has the body of a sixteen years old boy, and not a very tall one. He remembers what he told him before, about him being a sickly child, and when he feels his bones under his hand he suddenly hugs him back.

How many years did he spend on Agares's rack before he became who he is now? Logan doesn't know if any kind of salvation is possible for people like him, for people like them, but he does know two things. The first one is that evil is definitely made, at least for some of them, and the second is he will kill that son of a bitch of Agares whenever he gets the chance.

After a long moment, Andras lets him go, and as if nothing happened says

"Let's go and review our Legions"

And he adds

"Team mate"

Castiel is uncomfortable. A few years ago he would certainly have appreciated being worshiped, but now it just makes him want to run away and hide. Because right now, there are angels, dozens of angels, hundreds of them, who are knelt in front of him, blessing him, calling him Commander in an ecstatic voice.

Well of course, he said he had been led to the amphora by the Word of God, so now they all think he's God's favorite or something. If they knew he got it by an angry fairy whose only desire is to send God to jail then maybe they wouldn't be so enthusiastic. At least he has Gadriel and Hannah to understand what he's going through, because he also has to talk to the Faithful's leader, Ariel, who's a fanatic dickhead.

"I knew... I knew God would agree with our Quest to restore his Heavenly Guard Castiel, I knew he would hear our prayers, my prayers I..."

Castiel tries hard to smile and says

"Yes uh... our prayers have been heard and we're all happy Ariel, but what is your plan, tell me. Because if we need to join forces, my followers and yours, then I need to know what you want to do."

Ariel looks at him with the most innocent eyes

"Well, free Michael of course as I have always said. Free our leader and his vessel, so he can help us, help you rebuilding Heaven."

Castiel raises an eyebrow

"And what about his brother?"

Ariel coughs

"Well... freeing Lucifer would restart the Apocalypse and... we are still very weak."

Castiel nods

"I just wanted to be sure we were on the same page here."

The Faithful smiles

"Of course, Castiel, of course."

Castiel walks towards Gadriel and Hannah who ask him what Ariel said.

"He's a lying scumbag."

Answers Cas, and even if it's really not the time, Gadriel and Hannah laugh. Castiel adds

"I don't believe for one minute they're going to free Michael alone. They want them both out."

Hannah asks

"So what do we do?"

Castiel answers

"We hope the Legions are strong enough to protect the Cage... but not to kill us all..."

A walk in the park.

Dean is standing on a cliff with Crowley and Meg, and he can see his Legions from above. Even if he absolutely loathes his job, it's still pretty impressive. He has no idea how many demons are now looking at him, waiting for a motivational speech. Meg said they were close to five thousands, and he can't believe they managed to train all these people in so little time. On his left, he can see Kimaris and Katrina's legions, strong and disciplined demons, holding long spears, their leaders standing in front of them, fierce and proud, looking like ancient warriors. Then, he sees Agares's group, each soldier holding a different kind of weapon. The psycho is in a sedan chair, a fucking sedan chair, Dean can't believe it though it suits his character. And then there is Andras and Logan's group.

Logan told him earlier than he and Andras would support his claim when the time comes, and even if he can't stand the guy now that he knows who he is, it's still good to know. He can't bet on Andras's loyalty if Agares decides to betray him, which definitely could happen. Logan on the other hand, is maybe a son of a bitch, but a hunter's word is a hunter's word. If everything goes smoothly tonight, maybe he'll be King by midnight.

Meg walks in front of him and yells

"Legions!"

All the soldiers kneel.

"All hail our King!"

And the soldiers say

"Long live the King!"

Dean guesses Crowley must be smiling right now. Satisfied of himself and his little tricks. Well guess who i'm gonna kill first when I'm in your throne, bitch?

"All hail our Commander, Dean Winchester, Bearer of the Mark, General of the Knights of Hell!"

The crowd yells Dean's name, and if he's honest, he must admit it feels pretty great. He walks forward and says

"Faithful Knights, Soldiers of Hell's Legions, tonight we defend Hell! Tonight we show the Angels their time is over!"

The soldiers applaud.

"Protect our Kingdom, have your share of kill... And paint this valley with angel blood!"

The crowd roars, and Dean turns to Meg, whispering

"I didn't think your speech would work but it did."

And Meg replies, in a smirk

"Well I know them, I know what they need to hear."

They hear Crowley cough behind them, he says

"I must say I'm impressed Dean... and Meg. Good job mates, good job. I'm expecting you'll lead your troops to battle, right Dean?"

Dean looks at him, trying to hide his anger.

"I don't think the Commander is supposed to do that..."

Tries Meg. Crowley ignores her and says

"I want you on the front line Dean. And if Trenchcoat comes..."

Dean's throat tightens

"I want you to kill him first."

The candles suddenly lit and then they were surrounded by a golden light. Sam doesn't know if Kevin, Charlie and Linda can see it. Maybe they can since they look completely dazzled. His whole body feels warm and it's like he can feel his own blood running through his veins. He can feel everything, from the people surrounding him, to the trees around, the light, the air, the wind the... Is that this Lifestream Rudi was talking about?

It feels like when Saskia gave him that "power up" back in Magnus's house, but maybe a hundred times stronger.

"Now we are connected"

Says Rudi, still holding his hand.

"From this day on, we will share everything. Power, energy and life."

Saskia says

"I, Saskia Jager, swears to be faithful to my brothers, may this Coven live forever, in this life and the next"

She turns to Sam and he repeats

"I, Sam Winchester, swears to be faithful to my brother and sister, may this Coven live forever, in this life and the next"

And finally, Rudi says

"I, Rudi Hartfeld, swears to be faithful to my brother and sister, may this Coven live forever, in this life and the next."

He adds

"We are taking this solemn vow, with Mother Nature as a witness."

The wind suddenly gets stronger enough to blow the candles. Rudi lets go of Saskia and Sam's hand and says

"It's done"

With a big smile on his face. Saskia looks at her hand and makes a fireball, she stares at it with the eyes of a child looking at a Christmas tree.

"I'm pretty sure this thing could burn... everything."

She grins

"I want to burn something."

Rudi laughs.

"Be patient darling. You'll have plenty of demons to burn when we get on the battlefield. Sam? How do you feel?"

Sam feels a little dizzy

"Uh... I don't know... A little... high... I think?"

The older man laughs again

"You're sharing your power with us permanently now. So maybe you're a little high on energy but hey, you know what?"

Sam shakes his head

"I can feel your power too and that's pretty damn amazing."

He adds

"We're gonna win this war. We're gonna get your brother back."

Sam clenches his fists

"Yeah. I can feel it too."


	24. No Easy Battle

_"We can't stay back doing nothing while you're out risking your lives!"_

Kevin can't stand the idea of staying in the bunker during the battle. Yes neither of them can fight angels and demons, but there must be something they can do to help. Saskia, Sam and Rudi are leaving in a few minutes, all powered up now they're linked by a coven spell. Their strategy is simple, while Rudi will stay out of the battlefield, just sharing his energy with them, Saskia and Sam will move the fastest possible to reach Dean. Then, Sam will have to cover Saskia while she'll burn a transportation portal that will send Dean in the bunker. Once it's done, the three of them will go back. Cas plans to order a retreat the soonest possible. Gadriel and Hannah have told him the Knights of Hell army has more or less five thousand soldiers, almost twice the number of angels available for battle.

Once the Commander of the Knights of Hell is no longer there to command them, they will probably start ripping each other's throat, and Crowley's, hopefully. There is absolutely no need to get involved too much in this battle where they want both sides to lose.

Sam gently pats Kevin's shoulder

_"Kev... if you go out alone while we're not around, you could get killed."_

Kevin frowns and Sam adds

_"It's just for a day... And you're far from being useless. Look at what we know thanks to you, Oz, the Grail."_

Charlie coughs

_"Maybe we could uh... find the artifacts... While you're gone. The amulet and the...sword? Spear?"_

Saskia says

_"Well yeah sure. That doesn't require to have magic, though it helps. Kevin's a prophet, so he certainly has some."_

Kevin looks surprised and Saskia smiles

_"It's just like cooking a recipe. You need to be precise with the ingredients and the words you say. I read what Vivian gave us, and it's not dangerous."_

Linda nods and says she will supervise the use of the ingredients

_"Because if you need someone with cooking talents, then you need me."_

Rudi warns them though

_"Once you have the objects, don't try anything. Don't wear them, don't touch them with your bare hands. Wait for us to be back so we can be sure they're harmless."_

Linda assures him nothing dangerous will be done, and the three warlocks leave the bunker.

Before crossing the portal, Saskia feels some bitterness in her mouth. She's not a psychic like her mother so it's certainly just anxiety. But it seems way too simple. They all sound like those people who were convinced to go to war for a couple of months and who remained buried in trenches for four years.

Delusional.

There is no such thing as a simple battle.

_"I don't wanna do this!"_

Dean keeps on repeating that but it makes no difference. His body moves against his will and heads fly around him. How many angels has he already killed? He doesn't know. It feels him with dread but also, and that's maybe the worst, of energy and with something close to physical pleasure. There's a laugh bubbling in his stomac, a laugh he wants to repress, but he feels like he's going to be soon overpowered by it. He can hear Crowley's voice, cheering him and the Knights, applauding at every dead angel falling on the ground.

Applauding at Castiel being beaten up like a dog. By him.

_"Defend yourself Cas!"_

He yells. He doesn't want to kill him. Why is he even here? Why is he still loyal to that pack of douchebags? Meg told him to stay away, Meg who is fighting right now, a few feet away from Dean, and whose black eyes don't hide her fear of seeing this particular angel being dismembered. It's far from being an easy battle though. The angels are definitely not weak, contrary to what Crowley seemed to believe, and there are also a lot of casualties on Hell's side. Still, Cas ordered his soldiers to retreat just a few minutes ago and they refused, saying they had the upper hand. And now they're face to face. Cas's face is bloody and he's looking at him with his sad blue eyes, barely fighting back.

_"Defend yourself or get the Hell away!"_

Why is he staying there? If he doesn't leave right now, Dean will kill him. The moment he sees a loophole in his defense, he's going to rip his heart out with the Blade. That's what his instinct is telling him to do. That's what the swollen red veins emanating from the Mark want him to do.

_"I beg you!"_

Fighting is so thrilling that Katrina regrets not to be a human anymore. If she were one, she would feel those intoxicating adrenaline rushes that pushed her to her limit when she was a warrior. Her legion is strong, very strong and Kimaris is the greatest leader of all. All the angels who approach her look at her with fear and dread. Katrina wonders if they recognize her, if they know she used to be one of them.

Agares, a few yard away has finally joined in the battle and is now completely covered in blood. He kills himself every soldier who makes just one step back and he seems to really enjoy himself. It's not the way you win a war, and his legion has already faced many casualties. But he's clearly there for the bloodshed, there's nothing strategic about his erratic orders.

She can't see the others. But it doesn't matter. The orders are simple, they need to win. She grips her spear and faces a new enemy when suddenly she sees Kimaris had stopped fighting.

She's talking with an angel. A man with huge black wings that Kimaris has just called "Ariel".

_"You're an angel Kimaris, you used to be an angel, let us pass!"_

Kimaris strikes him and shouts

_"I have no loyalty to the angels. I'm loyal to my Commander and my King"_

Ariel blocks her spear with his blade and replies

_"Which King? The real one? Or the usurper sitting on this mountain?"_

Pointing in Crowley's direction. Kimaris doesn't answer.

_"We'll free your King if you let us pass. We'll free them both. We'll accomplish God's will."_

Kimaris laughs and strikes again, cutting deeply Ariel's arm

_"I don't trust you angel. I trust my Commander."_

Ariel wipes the blood off his arm and says

_"You trust Dean Winchester? Dean Winchester has no word. He would let the world burn to save his brother. His brother, who is Lucifer's true vessel."_

There's a hint of hesitation in Kimaris's eyes. Ariel smiles

_"You've been in prison for so long, I guess you didn't know. Do you really think your Commander is going to give his brother away to our King?"_

Kimaris keeps fighting, but her blows are definitely weaker. The angel makes a swift move and slices her leg.

_"His brother with whom he shares his bed?"_

Ariel pushes Kimaris on the ground, and Katrina begins to run towards her. She doesn't know what this talk is precisely about, but she won't let her friend get hurt. Before Ariel can make his final move, she jumps and kicks his jaw. He falls in the dirt and spits a tooth.

_"Makes wise choices sister. Dean Winchester will never free your King."_

Katrina helps Kimaris get back on her feet, and the Persian angel says

_"I'm listening. What do you propose?"_

Ariel grins.

Andras's attitude is quite unexpected. He asks Logan for strategy advise, he doesn't order unnecessary torture, and he keeps close, making sure neither of them get hurt. He is still the same creepy and sadistic person in many ways, but there has been a little improvement, he's become tolerable, and if they survive this battle, maybe Logan will be able to live close to him without being too annoyed.

The psycho is growing on him. How is that even possible?

Agares is fighting like the maniac he is, and it doesn't look like he's going to get killed anytime soon. He's extremely strong. Andras told him several times, and he thought it was maybe his Stockholm Syndrom talking but no, absolutely not. Agares didn't exaggerate when he told the Commander he used to lead Legions and was one of the best generals he could find. He is. Though he's so bloodthirsty he's already lost a lot of his soldiers.

Suddenly, he hears a clamor, far away, on the other side of the battlefield. Demons are screaming "get back! get back!" and some of them have just collapsed on the floor, apparently dead.

_"What's happening?"_

He whisper, trying to see a little better. Andras gets closer to him and says

_"Have you seen this?"_

Logan says he had, and that they should go and have a look at who's this angel who has such a tremendous power. It's a very tall man, slowly walking towards the Mountain where the King is standing. All the demons on his way just fall dead and they hear a deep voice with a Scottish accent yell at them

_"It's Sam Winchester! Kill him!"_

Andras begins to run towards Sam, and before Logan can make a move he sees fire. Bright yellow fire surrounding Sam Winchester, the Commander's brother who apparently has powers no one knew about.

No.

He's not the one doing this.

Emerging from behind his back, there's a blond woman. She's older now but he would never forget her face. He shouts

_"Andras! Back off now!"_

The blond boy stops running and turns to him, confused. Logan can't let him go. After all he doesn't Kay to burn him to ashes anymore. Plus it's definitely not his fight.

_"You remember the Lost Child of Azazel who was supposed to be dead?"_

He says, strongly holding his sword. Andras nods.

_"May I introduce you to Saskia Jager, definitely not dead."_

The boy's eye widen as he sees his soldiers getting burnt one by one.

_"Tell our soldiers to retreat, I'm gonna try to stop her."_

Andras grips his shoulder and mutters

_"Don't die on me..."_

Before shouting retreat to his soldiers. While Sam Winchester walks freely to the Mountain, Logan walks closer to the blaze surrounding the girl who killed him twelve years ago.

This is now. Castiel is on the ground, exhausted, and Dean just has to strike one last time. He has tears in his eyes and a thirst for blood in his mouth. He's going to be mad at the end of the day. He yells

_"Why don't you defend yourself Cas? Why?"_

Castiel stares at him with his sad blue eyes and says

_"Because I don't want to live anymore Dean."_

Dean buries his Blade in his friend's chest, screaming a heart-breaking "_No!_". He just managed miss Cas's heart, but he's still deadly injured.

He crouches near Cas and holds his head, muttering "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." and Cas manages to say, fighting the blood invading his mouth.

_"I... I'm sorry Dean... I'm glad... I met you..."_

Dean nods, his hands gripping Castiel's trenchcoat.

Cas closes his eyes and Dean feels rage bubbling inside him. He needs to make his claim right fucking now and kill Crowley once and for all. He feels a hand on his shoulder and is going to rip off the head of whoever dared to touch him.

_"Let me take care of him Deano."_

There's a blond man standing in front of him and Dean can't believe his eyes.

Whatever this battle means, it made him leave his hideout.

_"Gabriel?"_


	25. Whatever You Want

She hasn't changed. She's surrounded by a fire tornado but her clothes aren't burning, and she doesn't seem weakened at all. Her eyes are glowing and she's not saying a word. Sam Winchester is standing inside the tornado, and every demon he looks at just falls dead on the amber eyes, same extremely focused expression. They're covering each other and it's obvious no ordinary demon can touch them. Logan is going to die and he knows it. The other Knights should be there, they should rally here right now. What the Hell is happening?

She hasn't seen him yet. He can bet that the moment she will, he'll have maybe ten seconds to live. Maybe less.

_"Saskia..."_

He mutters, trying not to shake, not to show his fear. There's too much fire, way too much fire. She turns to him, staring at him with her yellow eyes, with no visible emotion showing. He sees her grabbing Sam Winchester's hand, and tell him something in the ear. The man nods, hugs her briefly and steps outside the fire circle Saskia's just opened for him. He's walking towards the hill, towards the King, and demons are falling dead at his feet. Some of them start running away, and the angels are still attacking, falling from the sky like meteors.

She's walking towards him, and he grips his sword the strongest he can. He won't die like a coward. He will die with his weapon in hand. The fire is getting closer. He closes his eyes briefly, and when he opens them again, he's standing inside the tornado, in barely bearable heat, but unburnt. She's six feet away from him, arms crossed, and Logan is prepared to attack.

_"Don't be ridiculous"_

She says, and suddenly is sword becomes burning hot. He drops it on the ground and sees it melt and disappear in the earth. Then he sees Saskia casually taking a cigarette out of an antique metal case, and start smoking it, still staring at him, a hint of a smile on her lips. Logan is torn between fear and hate. And something else. Her forearms are bare, and he can see no scars, when she used to have a lot, many of them being his doing. His hands are shaking now, and there's nothing he can do to stop it. She has turned into a real monster this time. And he is to blame. He is her Agares.

_"Saskia..."_

She keeps silent and put out her cigarette on her arm. There's a no on Logan's lips but the word remains stuck in his throat. It reminds him of Andras cutting his wrist and calling the blood pretty. The hate he feels is not directed at her. He wants to throw up.

_"Well, well, well..."_

She says. The burn on her arm is vanishing, and after a few seconds, there's no trace left.

_"Looks like you can't hurt me anymore. I wonder how that makes you feel."_

She adds, her eyes turning back to green.

_"Hello Logan. It's been a while."_

Sam is slowly walking and there's nothing, no one who can stop him. He could do that eyes closed. It's like he feels every single demon. Actually it's not like. It is. He feels every one of them, and every time one gets to close, he just thinks "die", and he dies. He also feels Saskia, who's just told him to go alone, that she would take care of the Knights while he would get to Dean.

_"Be there in a minute"_

She said, adding she could use her extra juice to kill a couple Knights. That was not part of the original plan, but the world won't regret them, and they feel strong enough to fight this entire army. Just the two of them. Though they can't. As Rudi said "you're still human beings. Don't ever forget that. Your energy isn't unlimited. Don't push yourself or you'll faint and be killed."

It sounds a little dramatic when you feel so omnipotent, but Rudi is rarely wrong, as far as magic is concerned, and when he's not overly optimistic, it means the danger is real. But still. Sam is sure he has enough power in store to kill Crowley. And he really, really wants to.

_"Hello there Moose."_

He says, still looking cocky and confident. Sam looks at him and a mean smirk appears on his lips

_"Hello there Crowley"_

He replies, with a fake Scottish accent. Crowley drops the mask for a minute. This isn't Sam Winchester he has in front of him. Not the over sensitive, tortured and global pain in the arse he used to know. This is Azazel's son. This is the Boy King. He had always thought the tales he had heard about Sam during his demon blood days had been widely exaggerated. But the giant standing in front of him actually fits the description perfectly. He has to summon Dean, but his throat is crushed by an invisible hand, and his own powers don't seem to reach Sam. He's been stupid. He sent Dean to kill Trenchcoat because he thought it would be amusing. He thought the one with powers was the fire throwing angel protecting Sam, the one fighting with two Knights right throwing though. Not really a power in the angels' store. Whatever. He's been too confident. Too focused on what was happening on the other side of the battlefield. Was Trenchcoat dead? Not yet?He has just heard a clamor there, angels chanting "Gabriel! Gabriel!". But that's impossible. Gabriel is dead and... Oh Hell the pain...The pain is unbearable.

Dean should have never left his side

He should have guessed. He should have known Moose would never let him have Dean. He thought he would do the usual Sam without Dean routine. Self destruction, attempted suicide, heavy drinking... He thought he had buried himself in his bunker, crying like a girl on his brother's pictures, that's what he was supposed to be doing. Crowley thinks that the moment he gets out of this situation he's going to torture every single demon he appointed to spy on Sam.

If he does get out.

_"I guess you were not expecting this, were you?"_

Says Sam, still smiling. He's enjoying this. He's visibly enjoying seeing Crowley suffer, seeing his face getting red, swollen, his tongue getting blue. Strangling him won't kill him and Sam knows it. Who knew there was a sadistic side to the one he thought was the weakest of the two? Crowley could laugh right now. He chose the wrong one to bear the Mark.

Sam walks one step further.

_"You have toyed with us for the last damn time."_

Crowley wants to laugh. The first thing he did when he became King again was going to Hell's Vault to free his soul. So no one could use it against him. Of course, with all the crimes he has committed the little blue light flew far, far away from him. And he was glad then, he had destroyed the last string connecting himself to humanity. If he had just kept it... It was his life insurance. Or Hell insurance.

_"I wish there was a place worst than Hell I could send you to."_

It's starting, Crowley feels his insides burning. It's like being struck by lightning, or how he imagines it. There's a fire burning his veins, and his crushed throat won't even let him scream. And no one comes to the rescue. They're too scared, or just maybe happy to see him die. Bastards.

Bloody bastards.

_"I hope you reincarnate as a fucking roach"_

Hisses Sam, spitting on the ground, next to the Scot lifeless body. He feels like laughing. It's pretty fucking liberating. He turns around and sees Saskia below. There are two other Knights trying to get to her. Dean's not one of them. He needs to find him, but he can't leave her alone either.

He still got a lot of energy in store. They have time. They're going to kill those Knights and then get his brother back.

_"What part of I'm a fucking archangel don't you understand?"_

Gabriel is pissed. Every time he's reunited with his people he realizes how stupid they all are. In the beginning he didn't want to be involved in this. Hell no. Since everyone thought he had been killed by Lucifer, he was hiding, living the Casa Erotica dream in Brazil, and had decided he would never come back to Heaven again. He had resisted coming back when Metatron arrived. After all, closing the gates of this depressing place that is Heaven wasn't such a loss. Plus, maybe the angels could actually enjoy living there, like he's always had. He doesn't know why but he's always felt like he belonged there more than in Heaven.

Anyway.

Then he heard they wanted to free Michael, and certainly Lucifer. Apocalypse 2.0. What a great idea. So new. So innovating.

And since he's the last remaining archangel he thought it would be a good idea to kick some common sense in those thick soldier's brains. Well apparently it's not so easy. It's like talking to a crew of Blues Brothers, endlessly repeating "We are on a mission for God".

No, you're not, you fucktard.

Fortunately he managed to save Castiel, maybe the least moronic of the crew. Two other angels, Gadriel -way less self righteous and stubborn than the memory he had of him - and Hannah, a brunette he's never met, but who seems fiercely protective of her "Commander", as she calls him, have sided with him.

_"When I say retreat, it means everyone stops fighting and gets back home. Castiel is out, your other commander is definitely not an archangel... Chain of command soldiers, does that ring a bell?"_

The other angels are a little defiant. Well of course it doesn't help that Dean Winchester is standing beside him with another demon, Meg, was it? Who is holding Castiel like he's the most fragile and precious thing she's ever seen. An angel says

_"Why are you collaborating with demons Gabriel?"_

And here we are. Before he can reply anything, Meg says

_"I'm taking this one away, to safety."_

And Gadriel adds

_"Coming with you."_

Obviously they know each other, though the very visible contemptuous expression on Gadriel's face show that he's not thrilled to go anywhere with her. That doesn't matter, it's one less demon. Another angel, obviously afraid, but still pointing his blade in Dean's direction says

_"You... Winchesters... You're all the same... Demons... "_

Gabriel sees Dean is deeply annoyed, and before he can tell him to calm down they hear people shouting

_"The King is dead! The King is dead!"_

Dean is obviously shocked. He grabs the first angel he sees and growls

_"Who killed him?"_

The angel looks at him with despise and says

_"The demons said it was the Boy King."_

Dean feels suddenly sick

_"Oh God... Sam..."_

What the Hell happened while he was away?

_"So, Knight of Hell, huh? I wonder what Rick would think of that."_

Says Saskia, trying to keep her cool. If there was someone she didn't expect to see again, it was most certainly him. Fucking Logan Atkins. Looking exactly the same, like a ghost coming straight from her past. With his dark hair, dark eyes, and his multiple scars. Guess becoming a high class demon doesn't come with free plastic surgery.

Keep being sarcastic. Keep pushing the emotions away. There's a child inside her who still wants to know why. Why did he hurt her like this, why did he hate her like this when all she had ever wanted was a little love and a little attention. But it's not the time to be weak.

He doesn't answer though, and it doesn't look like him. In the past he would have lashed out for ten percent of what she's just said. After a moment, he says, with a surprisingly calm voice.

_"Let's get it over with."_

Saskia raises an eyebrow

_"You don't wanna fight the demon Logan?"_

He looks at her, and there is... no. Can't be it.

_"Well that's surprising! Unless you're waiting for your buddies to join the party?"_

Logan looks around. Oh fuck. Andras and Agares are outside, trying to force the circle of fire. Not succeeding so far, sending demons after demons to run and burn. Certainly Agares's idea. Though Andras told him not to die on him. Well sorry boy. But there's not going out alive today.

_"I'm not. And I don't. I don't want to fight you. And you're way stronger that I'll ever be Kay."_

Saskia's eyes turn back to yellow and the fire becomes stronger.

_"That's not my name."_

Logan steps back and says

_"Saskia listen..."_

He sees her outraged face and he raises his arms, showing he's not a threat. But a fire ball hits him in the chest and throws him on the ground

_"Give me orders again, I dare you!"_

She hisses, visibly mad. Logan is badly burnt, and he's just heard Andras scream outside. "Attack! Attack!" he's yelling. At him? Or at the demons?

_"I'm sorry..."_

He whispers, fighting the stabbing pain. Saskia's eyes become green again. She says

_"About what? Losing?"_

He tries to get up but cannot move. He breathes in and explains

_"About what I did... to you... I..."_

He's not healing. He knows this is no ordinary fire, he's seen it in action. She burnt him enough to make him suffer until he dies. He tries to breathe again and adds

_"I deserve... everything... that happened to me... burning... and Hell and this but..."_

He makes one last effort to grab her wrist and she doesn't push him away

_"Saskia don't... please don't..._ _let what I did... turn you into someone like me..."_

He coughs and spits some blood

_"You were never a monster... to begin with... And I... wasn't either..."_

Saskia frowns, fighting against something inside her who wants to comfort him. Hi Stockholm, it's been a long time. But she still crouches beside him, and still lets him hold her wrist.

_"I turned into... worse than Rick... I..."_

There's a tear falling from Logan's eye and he hasn't cried since the first night Rick came inside his room. Saskia knows those eyes. He had them sometimes when he was sober, and then it was like he had to kill something inside himself with booze or coke. What does he mean by worse than Rick?

_"I did to you... what he did... to me..."_

Saskia can't hide the emotion surfacing. He holds her wrist stronger, he doesn't have a lot of time left

_"You're better... than that... than me... than him..."_

Saskia can finally talk and move. She holds Logan's hand and says

_"Rick hurt you..."_

Logan nods, and Saskia knows he's not lying. There's hate and sadness filling her body, and she looks at Logan straight in the eyes

_"What would you do if you had a second chance Logan?"_

Logan coughs again, and spits some more blood

_"Whatever you want me to do..."_

He says trying to smile. Yeah. That would be a fine way to redeem. Or at least to try. Doing the right thing for once. But that's definitely not happening in this life.

Saskia smiles back.

_"Good answer."_

She puts her hand on his chest, and the wounds closes. Logan gets up, incredulously looking at his now smooth and healed skin. Saskia looks at him and says

_"I'm the one who gives the orders now. So we're going to fight your team mates, ok?"_

Logan nods again and Saskia adds

_"Try to double cross me and I burn you to ashes."_

The knights laughs and replies

_"I know you will."_


End file.
